The Therapy Crouch: Role Models

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I don't know how I feel about this.

Info out, don't bang, bang, ding, ding, ding.

Leave it.

My arm changed behind that thing

because I've got drive.

I've got determination.

Let me get that.

Can I help you with the dishwasher?

Hello, and welcome to the therapy crouch.

It would be Peter Crouch.

I've got Abby Clancy with me.

Hello, hello, hello.

What are you laughing at?

No, just laughing at our ass.

Oh, OK.

Thanks, Adam.

At him or with him?

I'm not at him, with him.

Oh, OK.

What am I involved?

You are involved.

We just...

Yeah, you're the one I'm laughing at.

Private joke.

Private joke, was it?

It's a private joke.

OK.

It's a family thing.

Oh, no.

Pete hates that one.

So, before we started this, before the cameras were turned on,

you said,

I'll get the cameras on quick

because I can feel pure gold bursting out of me.

So, you've got a lot to live up to on this podcast now.

Well, that's put me under pressure somewhat.

Yeah, well, it has, yeah.

But I don't know, I just feel full of energy, full of life.

I'm happy.

It's the day.

I'm happy.

It's the dog countdown, isn't it?

It's the puppy countdown.

Yeah, so I'm preparing things.

I'm nesting.

I'm nesting.

When is this nesting?

Like, n, no.

You know what I mean?

When have you nested?

What's nesting?

Nesting is a thing that women do before a new arrival.

It's a definite thing.

They did, because just like that home,

they make it like really homely.

You know, when we brought our kids in,

everything had to be perfect, isn't it?

Yeah.

But I feel like it's kind of, we've been together for 17 years.

I feel like it's a continual nesting period.

When do you go, ah, I've nested.

But the thing is, like, do you want to be married to a slob?

Like, it's just so fucking annoying.

Like, just be grateful.

Like, genuinely.

Like, I mean this.

I actually mean this.

Just be grateful.

Sorry, sorry, I'm clean.

Oh, I must try harder to be dirtier.

That'd work.

You know what I mean, though?

It's like, just stop interfering in my things.

In your nesting.

All right, I don't understand it, personally.

Okay, well, I'm going to...

Let me take this cushion, for instance, right?

You've nesting on this couch.

Like, you've brought in a splash of colour today

and with another cushion that we don't need.

We don't need any of them, really.

Well, I just emptied the cinema room

because, and I just thought,

a little splash of colour on the beige couch.

To match my mood.

Colourful.

Okay, all right.

You've actually really offended me.

With what?

Do you know what I'm going to do, genuinely?

I'm just not, I'm just going to not clean for a week.

I'm not going to do an online shop.

I'm not going to pack the kids' bags.

I'm not going to do anything.

And then you will be begging for me to come back.

Stop yawning and put your mouth closed.

No, I was taking a breath for me to say what I think.

Go on.

And what I think is that you couldn't do that.

You couldn't not clean.

I think, you know, we did this every day, don't we?

We sat in the kitchen and we did an ADHD test, didn't we?

It's not something to be laughed at.

I mean, that's a serious, obviously, a serious thing.

I keep getting accused of having ADHD.

But every question was...

I've got some of the questions here, actually.

It's challenging for me to pause and think before acting

when I experience strong emotions.

And what was the box you had to pick?

Strongly agree.

Strongly agree to strongly disagree in everything in between.

Okay, so that one, strongly agree.

My emotions heavily influence my decision-making process,

sometimes leading to impulsive choices.

Strongly agree.

Cap a book.

I often make decisions impulsively,

then often regret them later.

Strongly agree.

Peter Grouch.

I struggle to wait my turn in conversations.

I mean, I struggle to agree twice.

I interrupt others when they are speaking or working.

This is a joke.

I often finish other people's sentences.

Like, seriously?

I have difficulty keeping my thoughts to myself

until it's my turn to speak.

My favourite one I've had is when I'm telling a story.

She'll take that story off of me

and say it, even though she wasn't there.

And it was my story.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Repair it.

Because I've heard it and I can just add a little bit of elastic

and make it more entertaining.

You know, but the thing is, it's like,

I feel like it's something to do with being busy

and having so many things on your mind.

And it's like, I can't enjoy a leisurely chat.

I want it just to be, you know...

You need to just get the info out quick.

Info out, done, bang, gang, ding, ding, ding.

But if you think about people that are the best storytellers,

they take their time and build up the scene

and tell the story and finish it with a strong end.

And people will fucking roll dull.

Do you know what I mean?

I'm just saying, like...

When I read kids, when I read to the kids at night,

like, I'll do the voices and, you know, take my time.

I like that.

But I've just got loads to do.

And like most people, you know, our way of life nowadays

and society, it's very fast-paced

and you've got a million things to do.

And I don't know...

But you always say that.

Like, you always say, I've got so much to do.

Like, but you don't, you just need to just not...

But if we were both like you in the relationship piece,

that just wouldn't work either.

No, I agree with that, but I think that's why we're a good team.

Yeah, I agree.

Because...

But the ADHD thing, I'm going to look into it more, but...

I don't know, I just think it's about, you know, be...

You know, I have heard your stories a lot.

Yeah, but, you know, it's one of those things,

like, I've heard your stories a lot as well.

And you'll tell the story.

But you still like mine.

And sometimes I know that Abby's actually lying.

But I'll let her carry on, you know.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Until I don't say anything, you know what I mean?

I just don't.

I don't.

Whereas if I tell a story and put for a bit of a lestic on it,

I'll go, Dad, it happened.

That's Bollocks, he's lying.

And like blowing me up to the whole table.

Speaking of storytelling, we were in the Penguin building this week.

Recording our audiobook.

I felt quite intimidated going into the Penguin building.

Yeah, why?

Did you?

Because...

Why?

Because here we are.

Yeah, I'm going to set the scene.

When you walk into the Penguin building, you're...

Well, I automatically feel inferior

and less intelligent than everyone else.

Because they read a lot of books.

Yeah.

And write books.

Yeah.

And I know, you know, we've written our book.

You've wrote, you've got three books.

So, you know, you probably don't feel like that.

But I don't think anyone has ever, you know,

played the guess, guess the sex emoji game

in the lobby of the Penguin building.

No, I don't think they have.

I think I was the first for them.

But that is...

That's a positive thing, I think.

You know, there's no book like ours.

No, there's not.

And, you know, that game, actually,

is something I would like to incorporate,

actually, in the podcast.

Because I found it fantastic.

So, the game is, you know, we had to kind of...

We had a series of emojis sent to us

and we had to guess what the sexual pun

or sexual connotation was.

Yeah, there was a screw and a hole.

A helicopter.

Various things.

And we did make...

You know, it was just super,

one of those super intelligent games.

Yeah.

It's not lowbrow at all.

It was one that we could incorporate into this podcast.

But...

I think we traumatized the Penguin people.

Probably.

But, you know what, the book's turned out really well.

And...

And it's fun?

Yeah.

You know, it is not.

And we're proud of it, really proud of it.

You know, if you like the podcast, you'll like the book.

12th of October.

There you go.

God, it's actually a mental experience, isn't it?

You know, obviously, the whole process of the book,

you know, series of interviews,

you know, then we wrote the chapters,

the chapters were written, you know, we'd approve them.

It's only when you're actually reading things you've said out loud,

you're like, I didn't say that the whole time.

I was like, sorry, pause.

I don't think I said this.

No, like, no, you did.

It is the dictaphone record.

It's the dictaphone record.

Like, literally, like, I've done audio books before.

Oh, all right.

But I've not done one with that.

That was an experience.

No, I was in the booth with Darth Vader,

so Pete's sitting opposite me like this.

Down there, and even the guy was like too,

too, like, shy to say to Pete,

can you step away from the mic, sir?

Your breath is off-putting.

Bound Pete's like that in the booth,

having a full round.

What do you want me to do?

Just not breathe?

Do you want me to just not breathe in here and die?

I'm like, but you don't have to breathe into the mic.

And, like, all, you know, sitting opposite you,

because it's not often you sit opposite someone

for a long period of time.

Do you know what I mean?

I've done three audio books before

and not had a one issue, right?

I do one with you, and there was an issue every five minutes.

We had to pause every five minutes.

But you either can't,

I don't understand why you can't hear yourself breathe like that.

Well, I can't, really.

We all know I've got an issue with my nose,

but I can't really.

So I do, unfortunately, have to mouth breathe a little bit.

You know, that causes HDHD.

HDHD?

A-D-H-D.

Come on, imagine the quality on a HDHD.

Oh, my God. Did I tell you about the I'm not a fish thing?

No?

No.

So, now, if you have hiccups

and you say, I'm not a fish,

do you go?

That's actually it.

Honestly?

It did happen.

I watched it firsthand and I've seen it twice.

I've already seen it done twice and it's worked twice.

I'm not a fish.

So when you've got hiccups, you say, I'm not a fish

and your hiccups disappear.

So we were out with some of our friends at the golf clubs the other day

and I had the hiccups and Olivia said,

you need to say, I'm not a fish.

And I said it and he instantly stopped.

This leads me fantastically on to our weekly one.

Here we go, straight in.

You know, because obviously the puppy thing,

puppy gate.

So...

We all know my thoughts on it.

It's just, it's just bedlam ridiculous.

Yeah, but the kids are like also excited and I live my life

for my kids and I want them to be happy

and I also want to make myself happy.

Absolutely, nothing about the children.

Also, you think the stocks are there?

100% in million percent.

You, it's all for you.

So why, why is that such a problem for you?

That's fine.

I want you to do things that you enjoy,

but it just don't involve me in it.

Like, I don't want, it's the same with Jeffery.

I didn't, you know, I didn't want a dog.

You puppy, look at the benefits.

I love him.

Look at the benefits of it.

But this is the problem.

I'm not going to not like the dog.

I'm going to, I'm not an animal hater.

I love animals, but I just don't,

I just don't want another thing to have to worry about and look after.

So we had a bit of a row over this puppy anyway.

First day back in the gym as well, by the way.

So he completely ruined that for me

because I was on the bike in tears.

Oh, that's going too far now.

That's not true.

I was on the bike crying

because Peter were not allowed to have the dog.

And he texts me saying,

I love you, but you are ruining my life.

I want a text.

So I was like, you know,

it's first day back in the gym,

feeling good, full of energy,

and then like just nearly started crying over this text

because I'm ruining my ruining my husband's life.

That was, I mean, I was, I was being serious, actually.

But it was, you know, at least I said I love you.

You are trying to make my life so much harder.

I don't know.

You can love someone that ruins your life.

No, you're just making my life a lot more difficult

than it needs to be all the time.

You're not going to, I swear to you Pete,

you don't have to have anything to do with the puppy.

And then to make it up to me,

he bought the puppy pen, the puppy pads,

the puppy food, the puppy bed.

What a shitbag.

So he does love you.

What a shitbag.

You don't just get worn down by your family.

Like, and I know, because I know a lot of my friends

have had the same problem.

They say no, no, no.

And it's every day, every day.

And you just go, oh, do you know what?

Well, why can't you just say yeah?

Well, it looks like I have now.

Yeah, but look at how much stress you would have saved yourself

if you just said, babe, that's an amazing idea.

You're going to be so happy.

The kids are going to be delighted.

And I'm bang up for it.

But what about me, though?

Everyone else is going to be happy apart from me.

It's five against one.

Because I think you can shit out the garden,

you know, training another puppy.

Training.

Oh, I trained Jeffrey.

All right, Caesar.

I trained Jeffrey, didn't I?

Yeah, you did.

And you loved it.

He used to be like that in the garden,

fill me, fill me.

And you have a little puppy this big in the garden,

sit, fetch, do all the tricks.

Can you film this, babe?

Come and film this.

It was nice because it was listening to me.

And no one else does in this house other than that dog.

And I love him for it.

So would you say you were like Jeffrey's role model?

Yeah, I would say that.

Well, he looks up to me, doesn't he?

Like, he looks at me like I'm his master.

I like that.

When we take him for a walk,

how excited was he this morning?

Yeah.

When I said, get Jeffrey going for a walk.

It's ridiculous.

He jumps in the air like six feet off the ground.

It's like we're going on the same walk

that we go on every single day.

But he doesn't do that with me.

It's like Christmas Day for him every day.

And we just think, look how excited he is.

When I take him for a walk, I'm like,

Jeffrey, come for a walk.

He's like that.

Yeah, because he knows he's like coming in the car,

going the dry cleaners.

He's going to walk around the local village doing jobs.

Yeah, because I'm too scared to walk in the woods on my own.

I'm just not going to do it.

I am petrified.

Like it's my like phobia.

And we don't like doing much on your own, really, do you?

No, no, I am a wuss, but you know, so what?

Audience wise?

Yeah, let's get into the audience.

Did you have a mind for the week?

My wine's the dog.

It revolves around the dog.

Oh, OK.

And I think that, obviously, I know,

I think I've probably said this before, but you know,

that is the main wine I'm thinking about at the moment.

Your wine is me not wanting the dog,

and my wine is you wanting the dog.

No, my wine is that you told me that I was ruining your life.

Yeah, well, you're not ruining it.

I think you enrich it, but you're just making it.

You think?

I just think you're making it harder for me

to get through to navigate it.

What I'm doing, you know, it's a bit, it's a ploy.

It's tactical.

I'm going to get as many animals in here as I possibly can

before we have to sell up and buy the ranch.

The ranch.

You've got a split personality.

Last week, you were like, you can have,

if you, if my girl wants a miniature donkey,

she's having a miniature donkey.

Next minute, I'm getting a bloody puppy,

that the whole of Surrey.

I've got this breed, you know, renowned,

hypoallergenic, doesn't bark, doesn't molt.

Hypoallergenic.

Hypoallergenic.

It doesn't.

It will bark.

I'd say dogs probably bark.

If any of our listeners have got a caviar pill,

can you all tweet Peter and tell them how amazing they are

and that they're not barkers?

No, be honest with me.

Like, I feel like we've built up a nice relationship here

on the therapy crouch.

Be honest with me.

If you think like we should get it, get in touch.

And if you think we shouldn't get it, get in touch.

If you've had one and you think they bark and they're paying us.

For me, it is exhausting.

Like being married to you, like waking up,

like what moods you in?

Does he like animals today?

What moods you in me?

Is he an animal hater?

Is he Cruella or is he Ace Ventura?

Yeah, but imagine me, when you wake up,

I'm like, what animal is she going to get today?

So, talking of animals.

So, this week, the school had a family fun day.

And, you know, it was a great day.

You know, bouncy castles, face painting,

all little stalls that the kids have set up,

you know, little games and stuff.

Buy the ticket, win the lollipop, whatever.

Pony rides, outdoor soft play.

And then they had a kind of reptile section.

Just follow this.

Where you can hold a snake, a bearded dragon, python.

A what bearded dragon?

Lizard.

Yeah, lizard.

A bearded dragon.

A bearded dragon.

Take a lizard.

Yeah, bearded dragon, snake, tarantula.

The queue was ridiculous.

There's so much, I'm standing there

for about half an hour in this queue.

Get to the front of the queue,

turn around, all the kids are gone.

I can see them on the bouncy castle.

So, where's me holding a giant millipede?

A tarantula and a snake on my own.

Do you know what's so funny is that I was going,

she was, she showed me some pictures of the day

because I wasn't there, I was at the football.

And I was going through and I was going,

oh, great day, great day.

And then it was just pictures of ab, right,

with random, like, animals.

And I thought, where are the kids here, babe?

He was just holding, holding animals on their own.

But it turns out these, you know,

do you ever remember those, like,

toothbrushes that were in, like, a little bowl

and you could get them, like-

Oh, yeah, like the chewy ones.

In, like, service station, toilets or whatever.

Oh, yeah.

And it was like a toothbrush and a,

it was like, there was, like,

kind of plastic spindly things.

That's what its little legs were like.

Millipede.

The millipede and it kind of gripped round

and it was such a nice feeling.

Turns out, these giant millipedes are incredible pets.

Oh, that, yeah.

Don't even start, like, come on.

So when you're at-

Millipede's running around the house.

Audience wines.

Audience wines.

Oh, gosh.

Can you read today or not?

Shut up.

Hi, Abby and Pete.

I don't have a wine, but I wanted to give,

in the words of Ross, a weekly shine.

That's so weird.

I was thinking about this today when I was getting ready.

I was like, do you know what?

I'm feeling that positive.

I want to-

Do a weekly shine.

A weekly shine.

It's about my husband and his awesomeness.

It's his 40th birthday, firstly, so he deserves this.

He is honestly perfect in every way.

He came into our lives and instantly loved my two children.

He came into our lives and instantly loved my two children

from a previous marriage.

We now have three kids and life is just perfect.

He is perfect and the kids and I want to say

thank you for everything you do for us.

We love you.

Happy birthday.

Oh, what a lovely message.

That is a lovely message.

That's really nice.

Yeah, really nice.

That time you started saying things like that.

I do think that.

I say to you all the time,

it's only you sends texts like you're ruining my life

over a fucking puppy.

You read that one.

Can you believe that?

Actually-

I love you.

I cried on the bike.

Oh, that is sad.

I had to leave my gym class.

Kids, listen, I do love you, don't I?

Even though you are ruining my life.

Whenever my husband wants to get in shape,

he just won't do it.

He has to make a plan, research,

wait for protein powder to come.

How do I get him to bloody do it?

I can't do this yet.

Excuses, excuses, excuses.

You just got to get up and go.

Do you know, I find that with people,

people who talk the talk

and they're like constantly saying it,

like talking about, oh, you've got to do this,

you've got to do that, that does it.

They're always full of shit.

Yeah.

You know, people who are good at stuff

just get up and do it, I think.

No, I agree, I agree.

But it is, in all fairness to them,

it is hard to get motivated,

especially if you're out of that routine

of going to the gym, eating right,

you know, it's easy to get stuck in a rut,

you know, eat that packet of biscuits,

you know, have that slice of pizza,

not work out.

Yeah.

Once you're in it, you can kind of really enjoy it, don't you?

But it's hard to kind of do that first one.

The first week, by the end of the week,

you're like, yeah, this is great, but the first week.

All right, well, you know,

it's just got to get back into it, isn't it?

I think, I mean, gently just kind of maybe go with him.

Maybe go together.

Do you know what?

That's actually a really good idea.

There's nothing better than a gym, buddy.

Someone to spare you on, someone to hold your hand,

someone to go through the pain together with,

together with, someone to go through that pain with.

We went to gym the other day, didn't we?

Yeah, did you enjoy it?

Couples who train together stay together.

Absolutely do, yeah.

Correct. All right, here's another one.

Hi guys, absolutely love the pod.

My fellow, me and my fellow watch every week.

My whine is that when I tell him something,

like a new fact, for example,

there's a hurricane coming this week,

he acts completely uninterested to what I've just said.

However, later on, I hear him in conversation

with someone else, repeating my facts like they're his.

You do this.

This is exactly what you do.

You do this.

No, but you do this.

You know, it's the worst of this, Robin.

So we'll tell Robin something, a bit of gossip.

A fact, or this is happening.

You know, the train's going on strike tomorrow.

Yeah.

20 minutes later, he'll call us up.

You know, the train's going on strike tomorrow.

You know, she said this, they're splitting up.

The goss.

You told him.

Yeah?

Yeah, yeah.

He's like famous for it, isn't he?

He is, yeah.

I've told him things in the past and, you know,

to not even just a couple of days later,

he'll come over and tell me what I've told him two days ago.

So you must have told that many people

that you forgot where he heard it from.

I'm sure you don't tell anyone, but this has happened.

And you must have told so many people

that he's forgotten what I told him the first time.

So the guy at the rugby club told me this,

and it would be like, well...

I told you that yesterday.

You know, I heard an amazing fact the other day.

Yeah, go on.

Well, you know, the Nobel Prize.

So Alfred Nobel, a Swedish scientist, invented dynamite,

and he had a brother, and his brother died,

and in the papers he printed that it was him,

and all the news stories about him dying was, you know,

he was the creator of war and bombs and this and that.

He's like, you know, caused so much pain and death,

and he was that traumatised about, you know,

that was his legacy.

He decided to flip it all around and every penny he's earned

give it all to incredible causes.

And I just thought that was amazing.

So obviously to change his legacy before, you know,

he would die.

So that's the Nobel Prize.

Did he start the Nobel Peace Prize?

Yeah, so he donated all of his money

and everything to peace causes.

It's amazing, though.

Don't you think that thing...

Yeah.

Did you know that?

I knew that he meant a TNT,

but I didn't know that was what happened with the obituary.

Yeah, and so that's why it's the Nobel Peace Prize.

It's also the best football channel.

What is?

TNT.

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Why don't you get into the pod then?

Talk about role models today.

Obviously, I'm yours.

Why is that?

I would.

Clash, you're one of my...

Obviously, I don't want to say it.

What?

I actually consider myself as a bit of a role model.

To myself.

And I know that might sound strange and narcissistic,

but by that, what I mean is,

you know yourself what's right and wrong

and what's a good thing to do,

and if you live by the right morals and do things correctly.

But you can be your own role model.

Just a few captions from this podcast is,

when you die, you want simply the best of your funeral.

You've said you're always right,

and you're your own role model.

Because I think, you know, you should be your own role model.

You should go, I'm going to do this

because it's the right thing to go.

I'm going to say that because it's kind.

And if you live by them things, you know...

I don't think you'd be a role model.

You have to be a role model for your kids, obviously.

Yeah, a role model for you.

But you're also a role model for yourself

by making the right decisions and doing and saying the right things.

I think you're doing somewhat of me now.

Yeah, but a role model surely is someone

that you look up to, aspire to or inspire you to be better.

So I don't think you can pick yourself.

Who's your role models kind of growing up?

Who did you look to for inspiration?

Or did you have an inspirational teacher?

Madonna.

Madonna.

Yeah, what did you want to be?

Hello, Madonna.

Are you still just watching concerts?

No, for me, I think, you know,

the whole role model thing starts at home, doesn't it?

You learn from your parents.

I like to think that we're good role models for our kids.

Yeah, try to be.

You know, main number one thing, there's a lot of love

and there's a lot of laughter in our house

and that's kind of our main ethos, to love each other, be kind.

And then I think also the kids looking at us working, working hard,

you know, some of the things we teach them,

like never give up, be yourself, you know,

Sophia with the swim and she hates it, doesn't she?

And we make a go.

And I think, you know, that's instilling, you know, a good worth.

I think that's instilling a good worth ethic.

And, you know, our kids are born into a very, very privileged life

and different to what we had.

So I think we need to be extra vigilant when we're kind of,

you know.

Yeah, try and keep them grounded a little bit.

Keep them grounded and.

Yeah, that's important.

That's 100% important.

Listen, as parents, you have to be role models, don't you?

You have to live the correct way that your kids see you living that way

and want to follow suit.

Like I had role models growing up, obviously, with the football.

You know, Mr. Waring, North Eileen Primary School.

You know, Andy Campbell, my first football manager,

my dad, obviously huge influence kind of on my football career.

And then later down the line, when I first started playing for Tottenham,

my dad's bullpen believed in me probably when no one else did.

You know, and then from there, you have managers that believe in you

and you'd say they're role models.

And then there's footballers that I looked up to.

And I suppose being a footballer myself,

then you become a role model to other people

and you try and do things the right way.

That's quite an unusual path that you've had,

you know, because not a lot of people have been in your situation

or, you know, make it as footballers.

And so you have been inspired,

but most people in general, day-to-day life,

they're not going to football camps, they're not going to football training.

They haven't got managers buying them and believing in them, you know.

Yeah, but there's enough to be football.

What I'm saying is that was my industry, but there's enough to be football.

It could be, you know, I want to be in advertising

and I look at an advertising executive or creative

and you think, God, he's the one and even look at the stuff he does.

And, you know, if you want to be a musician, you look at, you know, someone.

Ed Sheeran said he wanted, like, James Blunt's career,

but ten times better and he's got it.

You know, I think it takes a certain individual to have that mentality.

Not everyone has got that to go, you know, pick someone and go,

right, I want to be them, I want to do better than them.

That's not everyone.

Like, you know, Michael Jordan, all of those kind of,

they cannot stop Ronaldo.

They create, like, I reckon Ronaldo would say he was his own role model.

Yeah, but you say, yeah, he probably was.

No, but I still think that those people have inspirations, like,

you know, Michael Jordan might have looked at Magic Johnson and said,

I want to, and then you, whereas you get older, you become your own person.

But I think you do need to be inspired by someone or something.

You know, you can't just, you can't just, I don't think do it.

I think teachers play a huge role in kids' lives as role models and inspirations.

You know, we all, we all had that teacher that we loved.

He was like so much fun.

And I think he gets, you know, if I was a teacher, I'd be Jack Black

in bloody School of Rock.

Imagine him being your music teacher.

Yeah.

Wouldn't that be, you would learn so much because you'd be so exciting,

enthusiastic to get in the cast instead of,

right kids, open your page on, open your book on page 34.

Today we're learning the violin.

How boring is that?

Yeah.

But like, all the best lessons and probably, you know,

the most you've got out of school and the lessons you enjoy and still to this day

are mainly because you've had a good teacher in that lesson, really.

Because if they make it interesting.

No, I, in one of the schools, Sophie has been in, in a course of her life.

She did quite badly in one subject.

I think it was geography.

And how interesting can geography be?

You know, it, no, that's what I was about to say.

No.

Oh yeah, it is interesting.

Yeah.

Geography is so interesting learning about the world.

You know, everything, countries, cultures, you know, rocks, rain.

Oxbow lakes.

Oxbow lakes.

Yeah.

Everything.

I saw, I can't even think of what I'm saying here, but,

and the teacher was like telling me how badly, like she'd done.

And I was like, I've been speaking to you for 10 seconds

and you're fucking boring me to death.

No wonder, no wonder she's done badly in this.

And then I went on to the, and you know, this is over zoom.

And then the next teacher I was speaking to, she,

a star student, fantastic.

100% the teacher, the English teacher was phenomenal.

You know, he lit up the screen full of enthusiasm.

You know, great.

And I thought that is the difference.

Yeah.

You know, and I think, you know, if I owned a school,

that's what I'd be looking out for.

Like inspirational teachers, someone who'd, you know,

get the kids running into the classrooms to like,

what are you laughing at?

No, just the thought that you're running a school.

Sanctions.

I'd be like Mr. Trudgebull.

Get in the cupboard.

You've got a mixture of trunche ball and honey,

but I think that's good.

I am a mixture of trunche ball and honey.

Yeah, which is good.

Trunny.

Ms. Trunny.

Close one.

Nothing.

What do you mean?

Yeah, I think you've got your good mix of both.

And that's what you need in a school.

You know, so if you are, if you do own a school

and you're looking for someone to run it,

Mrs. Clancy or Mrs. Crouch,

which one would you go by?

If you were in a school tomorrow,

would you be Mrs. Clancy or Mrs. Crouch?

Clancy is more Ms. Honey to me,

and Crouch is more Ms. Trunchbull.

I don't like the name Crouch, really.

I don't love it as a word.

As a word.

It's harsher.

Clancy seems more Ms. Clancy, Ms. Honey, Ms. Trunchbull, Ms. Crouch.

I can kind of see what you mean,

but I can't figure out why,

but yeah, it's a bit harsher.

It's just a harsher.

It's just a more of an end, isn't it?

Anything without an E on the end.

That's another thing I was reading up about,

what name to call the dog, Optimus Prime,

so I've got to work.

Why?

Because dogs respond to the E kind of syllable.

Primi.

Primi.

Primi.

Like Charlie, Albie.

Right, okay.

Doggy.

Doggy.

Poppy.

Falkafi.

Gedaudi.

Stay with Yari.

Rihomi.

I love the dog.

I'm going to love it.

It's one of those things.

We're going to have it on the show next week.

No, so role models, do you feel under pressure to be like kids role models?

Because obviously, we're only human.

We like to have a laugh.

You know, have a few drinks or say silly things,

do silly things, and then you think,

oh my God, because I often think that, you know,

when we've had a few drinks and then we put something on Instagram

or whatever, inappropriate,

and then I've got to like go and speak to the headmaster the next day.

And I will, you kind of forget that,

you know, things like Instagram, social media,

like that, everyone can see it.

Yeah, I did feel like I had to make conscious efforts,

like when I was a footballer, like,

only just around like kids and stuff,

because I remember when I met professional footballers,

like around near, you'd be so starstruck.

So I knew how I felt.

So I was like, I would try and make a conscious effort

to try and make them feel special or, you know,

not kind of do anything or say anything wrong around them.

And because I think you do, you do have to be a role model

and you can't be a role model all the time and we're only human.

So you do make mistakes, but I think around the kids and stuff,

like I don't like it now when you see kids kind of around the players

at some time, like when they're coming into the game and they ignore them.

All the young players do that now, like ignore all of the kids.

There's a headphone thing now, isn't there?

They put the headphones on, they try to get away from people.

But they need a bloody blindfold, not headphones.

You can still see them.

I know, I know.

There's a few bad kind of videos like that.

I think you do have to,

because it just means so much to the kids, right?

Doesn't it?

So I do think it's an element of that where you have to be a role model,

but you have to be a role model to young girls.

The amount of young girls when we're around that come up to you and ask you about things.

I feel so funny about that.

Like, I don't feel like worthy, number one,

to be even considered to be a role model whatsoever.

Yeah, but for yourself.

The girls, too.

Apart from for yourself.

Apart from for myself.

No.

Can I just say, can I just, I can't articulate myself very well

what I'm trying to say is people should be the own role model in a way,

like have drive, get up and go, be polite, be well-mannered, be kind.

Yeah, but what, we're talking about your role models or whatever.

You know what I mean?

You can't be your own role model.

That's just being a decent person, isn't it?

That's just setting us some values and living by them.

Exactly.

So why would you pick that from someone else?

You pick it from yourself?

Yeah, but I do think you see those qualities in others and you think,

I'm going to take that on board and that's kind of the role model.

But what if you're born with them qualities?

So you're saying you were born with all those qualities?

No!

I'm born with drive, determination.

Drive, determination.

I just came out and went, what are we doing, Mum?

I didn't say...

I'm going to shoot the stars, yeah?

No, that is not what I'm saying at all.

What I'm saying is you don't have to get...

Leave it, Mum, I'm changing my own napping because I've got drive.

I've got determination.

Let me get that, I'm going to help you with the dishwasher.

You are such an asshole.

I didn't mean that.

I'm saying why would you...

Why would you try and emulate someone else's qualities when you can have them yourself?

I agree, but I just think you do need to get them from someone else.

Okay, I got them from my mum and dad then.

Got it from my momma.

I got it from my momma.

Yeah, you know, my mum was my role model.

There you go then, we got it out finally.

Yeah, but you're just twisting what I was saying.

You said you're your own role model, right?

I didn't say I was my own role model.

I said, well, yeah, in a way, but I should be my own role model.

It's what's inside.

What is she talking about?

It's what's inside.

What are you talking about?

Oh, you don't understand.

I don't.

Fuck off.

Correct, I don't.

Hold on, I don't have a discussion here.

I pulled you off and what I think is incorrect,

and in the end you've just gone, fuck off.

Grow up.

Grow up.

You know exactly what I'm trying to say.

Toe rag.

Toe rag.

You are a toe rag.

Only word to describe you, Peter.

I've learned toe rag for ages, have you?

Toe rag.

God, that's gone out of fashion.

Our kids don't even know what a toe rag is.

Our kids don't even know you two are.

God.

That's the shame that they don't know what a toe rag is.

Toe rag was a good shout.

Do you point to them?

Yeah, it's a good put down.

I've called toe rag many a time.

A little toe rag.

Toe rag.

Scallywag.

Scallywag.

Toe rag.

So yeah, so what about being an inspiration to young girls?

Lord Mother.

You are, babe.

I've lost count around that time.

Young girls come over to you and say, God, you're an inspiration.

Yeah, it's so nice, but it makes me feel scared.

But you're always very good with them.

Because I love kids and people.

Yeah, you know, they do.

You've got to remember that girls do that,

especially with like that bridge, the next model thing.

Like they, girls are aspiring to be models

and they've seen a way to kind of do it

and you've kind of shown them that way because you did it.

Trailblazer.

Trailblazer.

No, do you know what I mean?

You did, didn't you know?

I don't know.

I just, I find it very difficult to, I don't know.

I don't really like talking about myself.

In that way.

Like, I don't like it when you're being serious about me.

Yeah, you don't, do you?

No.

I don't like talking about myself or what I've done or do or...

You get all embarrassed when I say that you're a role model.

Hmm.

I don't like it.

But you are.

Do you want me to change the subject?

That's nice.

Thank you.

That's it, you should get all embarrassed.

I do get embarrassed.

Was there any stand up when you were younger than teachers,

you know, you said Madonna.

But does anyone, do you think back and think,

oh, they were a brilliant teacher.

They inspired me.

You know, a teacher or, you know, even a dance teacher

or a singing coach or...

I've met loads of amazing people throughout my life.

Like, you know, when I used to, you know, go to dance.

And when I was a kid, like Craig and Pat,

and they'd have me singing all amazing songs and, you know,

give me the confidence, like, to get up on stage

and like sing and dance and...

I think that's what it is.

It's like someone that gives you the confidence to be able to do that.

Amazing teachers.

This teacher just thought I was unbelievable.

Like, oh, but I used to just trace everything.

And it was so awkward, like, keeping it up.

Got more difficult.

And there were one load of prizes in school,

and I remember drawing the Lowry.

Lowry, says.

Did you?

And you chased it?

Yeah.

And he just thought I was the bee's knees.

Oh, that's so funny, that.

I respect you for that.

But that's what happened to me, didn't it,

on my Count Duckula.

We've discussed this on the platform.

Where do you want Blue Peter or something?

I've been on Blue Peter a few times.

Have you?

I've been on Blue Peter a few times.

Yeah.

How?

Sure.

The back door.

Yeah, I remember we were, like, I was playing...

England under 18.

Oh, so Blue Peter as a famous person?

I wasn't famous, I was a kid.

You know, he was in the crowd in the Spice Girl movie.

What a big break.

He took his sister along,

because he loved the Spice Girls so much.

Baby Spice loved her.

I like the Spice Girls.

I'm not going to lie, right?

I was a fan of Spice Girls.

You know, as we all were.

You know, they don't pretend.

They don't pretend.

And they were filming Spice World, the movie, right?

And it was at the Royal Albert Hall.

And somehow, well, going in the ballot,

I got tickets for it.

And obviously, I couldn't take my mates.

So I thought, I'll take my sister.

She's only, like, young.

And I was about 17.

I think I was at Tottenham at the time.

I thought, well, I can't go on.

Well, I can't go on, you know.

Anyway, Sarah asked Sarah with me.

She was, like, the decoy.

So who's the Spice Girls, then?

Who's the Spice Girls, then?

Got to take my sister.

Is that the Spice Girls?

She goes, what's this, Dad?

I was like, you would enjoy it.

I said, sit there and don't ruin my experience.

Pete's like that to all his mates.

Got to take our Sarah to the Spice World tonight, didn't I?

I mean, bloody nightmare.

Really good brother.

Anyway, I took her and I said, shut up.

I'm listening.

Shut up, I'm perving.

I was giving it all the tunes and everything.

I was fully involved.

What was your favourite Spice Girls, then?

Caw.

I think they only did one, because it was part of the...

They only did once.

Yeah, because it was just film, so it was like they just kept...

I think it might have been Spice Up Your Life.

And, yeah, you can see me on the film.

No, you can't.

You've just made that bit up.

I did make that bit up, yeah.

But, again, this is what I'm saying.

Like, I made up a story there, you know.

You should have just had my back.

Talking about Blue Peter.

Yeah, Blue Peter. How did you get on Blue Peter?

I was on Blue Peter, you know, we were under 18s with England,

and they came down and watched us train.

And I remember he joined in.

So, yeah, when the presenter joined in,

I remember he wasn't very good.

I can't imagine Blue Peter presenters being good at...

Being sporty, though.

Do you know what I mean?

Can't imagine being like 20, keep you ups on the back.

No, when we joined in, it was...

We did take the mic out of him a bit.

But it was a great experience, and I got a little Blue Peter badge.

Have you still got it?

Yeah, I've got a collection of badges.

Boring.

No, I used to collect badges and key rings,

and I've got add-millions.

Boring.

My dad collects badges.

I loved it. I had some great ones, you know.

I remember...

41's when you used to go to the game.

It's all over, like, no, not just 31's.

Like, all like Chess and World Adventures,

all the towers, Isle of Wight, Blackang Chine.

Blackang Chine?

Yeah, yeah, Blackang Chine.

What is that?

It's like the Alton Towers in Isle of Wight.

Spectacular.

London Dungeons, places like that.

You know, I'd always buy a little key ring.

Moment of the day.

I have that sense of the year, memory box.

Like the wristbands from festivals and stuff like that.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Good times.

Thank you, then.

Not Blue Peter badges, though.

Do you have any kind of role models now?

There's so many people who are inspiring me,

like our friends, John and Caroline.

Like, she is so clever and so intelligent,

and she just makes me want to do more with my life.

So many of our friends like that, you know,

Andrew Martin Martin, you know, he's, you know,

traveled the world, he's so intelligent,

you know, he's so, got so much style and great taste and

can turn, can make any little thing look fantastic.

Yeah, so, like you inspire me, like you work so hard,

and, you know, everyone loves you, and you're an amazing dad.

You know, for me to be inspired,

it doesn't mean you have to be like a multi-billionaire,

or this or that, you know, it's, you know,

just having these qualities.

Someone who can make someone laugh in a room,

like make everyone feel good around them,

that they're considered role models to me,

or inspire me to be like a better,

I think for me, a role model is someone who you can look at,

kind of pinch ideas from, if you like, and improve yourself.

Yeah, make you a better person.

Make you a better person.

And I think that's it, like, definitely,

like, there's qualities that you've got that I have tried to instill in me,

genuinely.

Like what?

And I think, I think hopefully the same way.

No, like, no, because you're, you're kind of really proactive.

You're like, you know, you're a go-getter,

you know, you don't take any shit,

you know, like, there's things that I need to improve on that you've got.

These are all the qualities that genuinely yesterday you said you hate in me.

No, they can be a pain in the ass as well.

But like, no, no, no, they're good qualities,

but they're different to what I am.

So they're like, they're things I can improve on,

whereas there's things maybe that I have that you can improve on.

Your zen.

Yeah, a bit, yeah.

Yeah.

That's one of them.

That's for me.

Because in all honesty, it doesn't matter,

like, you can be a go-getter and you can be like, you know,

obviously really focused and dedicated.

I'm not a go-getter for me, though.

But what?

I'm definitely not a go-getter for myself.

No, I think you are, I think you're just, I think you're on it.

But I haven't said that, you know, you can be...

My ideas are for everyone else.

I can never think of anything for myself to do.

No.

Do I?

The only thing I want to do is ride my horse.

No, I do.

That's like the main thing that makes me happy,

as a hobby, if you like.

You're on it with everything else, aren't you?

You are on it.

And what I'm saying is that,

but if you don't have that kind of balance of like,

it's like, where are you going?

Like, why are you trying to do all these things

and trying to work, work, work, work, work?

And like, if you don't have that balance of like,

actually, is that making you happy?

Yeah.

I think sometimes you can go, you can tilt it too far,

but you have to get that.

You have to, yeah, because you have to be proactive.

But that's just poor diary management.

Is it?

Yeah.

What is?

Talk about the tilt.

The tilt is.

Because you can do stuff you love,

but if you do too much of your love

and it becomes stressful, then the tilt becomes...

Which is kind of what we're in now.

What I'm trying to say is like,

you need to bring up the happiness time.

Pete, but that's what a puppy does.

It balances that scale.

No, that does.

It masks.

That's what it does.

It masks the scale.

I don't know what you're talking about.

You're happy.

I am happy.

Psychoanalyzing, you know.

I know.

Stop.

Getting it totally wrong, you freak.

Some of your language to your husband

is an absolute disgrace.

What am I going to say?

It's a toerack.

A fucking toerack.

Freak.

Freak.

Agony abs, all right?

Hi, guys.

Who's your skim, brother?

Hey, guys.

Love the pod so much.

It's my husband's 40th in jam,

and I really want to plan a nice surprise for him.

What date?

That's ours.

Do we know what date?

No.

What are you going to do?

Are you going to do something for him?

No, because then we could say,

oh my God, that's the same day as us.

Okay.

We're all January now, family.

Well, three of us are.

Yep.

The other three are June, March.

Cool story, bro.

The problem is, he's incredible at surprise trips

and buying gifts, which is lovely,

but I have a lot to live up to.

In the past, I planned trips away,

surprised as he finds out and changes the plans

or upgrades them.

This is lovely, but I want to pull this off on my own.

Any ideas are welcome.

We have two little boys,

so although I'd love to go child-free,

it can only be for two, three nights,

max, thanks, and non.

Any ideas?

Two or three nights?

Got a lot to live up to.

Two or three nights is all you need.

It's all you need.

We've been trying to get these two nights for six months.

It's tough.

So, you know, I think a little Paris, a little Rome.

The Yoruba style here from King's Trust,

they're easy to do.

Exactly.

They're cheap as well.

A little Amsterdam, a little Barcelona.

A little Damwon, yeah.

Yeah, those little city breaks are just unreal.

We used to beat them a lot.

Yeah, we did.

Rome was a belt, I want to...

Florence.

Florence.

Capri.

Yeah, good, good times.

I picked my destination on the food.

You guess I've got deals in January as well, don't you?

Italy's up there, like the food's just unreal.

Oh, you just can't beat it.

Like so many...

Watching that Judge Rinder show, have you seen that?

No.

So good about all the amazing hotels, and they were in Puglia.

We've been desperate to go to Puglia all summer.

That sounds amazing, didn't it?

Oh, my God.

I love Judge Rinder, actually.

Anyway, Rome.

You can't beat Rome.

Oh, just everywhere you go.

Like, when we said...

We said that I was a guide,

and he was showing us bits and pieces and things like that.

It was amazing, like the Coliseum and...

Do you remember that?

And I was like, oh, my God, what's that?

And he went, that's just the post office.

And I was like, wow, it's incredible.

Like, literally...

Everything's beautiful.

Everything's beautiful.

You know, from...

I want to go to Berlin.

Yeah, I'd like to go to Berlin.

Or Porto.

It's supposed to be amazing.

So, you know, we need to start our little weekend trip again,

because obviously we did our Dublin.

And, you know, I said to my dad,

we should make this like a regular thing.

Yeah.

You know, going on our little two-day trips.

Just walking out of the hotel, do you remember?

We'd just go for like a walk.

That's just a great thing to do, isn't it?

It's just epic, isn't it?

We're in Florence, we stayed right in the mix.

Get the salamones on.

Get out there.

You know where's nice?

Bilbao.

Have you been to Bilbao?

No.

Bilbao's, really.

It's actually in northern Spain.

A bit like Liverpool, almost remind me of a little bit.

Quite industrial, like Amsterdam.

Basque.

Guggenheim, they're the food's amazing.

Basque?

Can't be.

Yeah, yeah.

He's Basque.

Yeah, so where could you...

Yeah, so, Rome?

I think Rome's the...

I just think you can't go wrong, really.

No.

Or the staycation.

Yeah.

Somewhere in the UK, maybe.

Oh, yeah.

Yeah, where's nice, UK-wise.

Get down to Cornwall, something, can you?

I've never been to Cornwall.

Oh, it's lovely.

I've never been.

It's nice down there.

I've had York's nice as well.

I've been to York.

No.

Rambles, what's it called?

The...

What's it called on streets?

Yeah.

The Shambles.

Bath was quite nice, wasn't it?

Bath was beautiful.

Brighton's quite good fun.

Yeah.

Erm...

Loads of options there, I think.

Definitely.

There's no place like Rome.

It's funny as well, aren't you?

Thanks, Wombley.

How do I make my husband of 23 years understand

that when I say I don't want anything for...

I don't want anything for Christmas or birthdays, etc.

I don't mean it.

Why?

What is this?

His default should be to go...

Should be to go to the list of things I've mentioned

over the last six months.

Please tell me I don't have to tell him what to buy

or I think we may as well throw the towel in.

If the element of surprise is gone, is it over?

Do I expect too much?

How do we do this?

Example.

I said, let's just spend £10 on each other.

This Christmas as we don't need anything.

Not for one minute did I think you would stick to this.

He went mad with...

I went mad with beautiful gifts.

I got shitty wool and gloves.

You get my drift.

Yeah.

I've been there, done there.

I said to Pete a couple of Christmases ago,

let's not get each other any presents.

And then I thought, he's not going to expect anything.

Now I'm going to get loads of lovely things

and I didn't get one.

To your own fault.

I don't get it.

Do you?

What?

Why say?

I don't want to say.

I want a Chanel bag.

I want three Chanel bags.

I want a diamond bracelet.

I want a Bentley and a puppy.

I don't really want to say that.

It makes me sound like I'm spoiled to a bit of a brat.

Just don't say anything then.

Just say, can't wait for Christmas this year.

What are you going to get me?

You know, like, don't say it.

You make a point of saying,

let's not do presents this year.

And then not mean it.

It doesn't make any sense.

Saying this silly girl as well.

Same thing.

If you said as well, let's do a £10 spend limit.

That to me is explicitly...

That's like, you've set the ground rules there.

And that, I think that'd be good.

Like, if you could do a thoughtful gift for a 10-on.

Sorry, we're not doing the £10 present.

You can shove that up your arse.

It's all, you know, I don't want any sentiment this year.

I've had 18 years of sentiment.

I just want to be spoiled rotten.

Well, at least that's pretty crystal clear.

You know what I mean?

Like, I'd rather that than saying something in a leaner.

You think I might be joking?

I mean that.

No, I know you do.

So, I can't wait for Christmas.

I just don't get it.

I'll never get that.

He's bought...

Would you be sad if you didn't get a Christmas present now?

Not if we said not to.

You like a little gift.

Obviously everyone does.

It's nice, you know what I mean?

It's like, it's nice to get a gift.

And that's what Christmas is about.

It's about, you know, it's about giving.

It's about being thoughtful.

Hi, both.

A girl I work with is on a health kick,

but the food she eats doesn't react well with her bowels.

When she comes into our small site cabin...

When she comes into our small site cabin office once a week,

I work on construction sites.

The place stinks of farts.

It's obviously hair.

Sorry, it's small.

When she comes into the...

When she comes into our small site cabin office for once a week,

we work on a construction site.

The place stinks of farts.

It's obviously hair, as it's only when she's about.

Is it acceptable to ask a wear colleague to stop farting,

or is this too rude?

I'm a fella, so the fact a man would be asking a woman

to stop stinking the gaff out seems inappropriate,

although it's needed from a nun,

and I know she listens to this.

Oh, my God, he's a nun there.

He's a nun.

She listens.

I hate that, though, when it's obvious that,

you know, if there's like two of you in a room,

and you know, you haven't done something yourself,

and it's obvious that it's them.

Oh, my God, but she's listening to this now,

that she probably knows.

She's going to die.

Unless she's dropping them for the sheer fun of it.

If he goes in, I'm going to just drop a bomb

on these lads and walk out, see what they say.

As if, as if, I don't think anyone in the history of...

She must have something about her, if she's, you know what I mean?

Site cab, yeah, construction site.

She's probably, she must be dealing with fellas all the time.

No, she's obviously the boss.

Yeah, but she must be dealing with like these, you know,

childish lads, lock out and on the building site, isn't it?

Yeah, I walked in, didn't I?

She's going, I'm going to drop this bomb on them,

and like, it's great, man, if she is, if she's not,

and she's listening to this, she's going to be very embarrassed.

I don't think that's a great, Benz, I think it's disgusting.

It is funny.

Pete, no one deliberately farts.

Well, I think you do.

Oh my God, that is disgusting.

The timing, the timing.

How is that even possible?

I would just squeeze that one out.

Wow.

I don't know if you did that.

I'd literally dump you instantly.

Instant, that'd be an instant.

An instant, you're getting dumped.

See, I can't even, I don't find that funny.

Ah, so funny.

It's like Pete last night, he was-

It's not funny.

You said, but I don't know, I don't think anyone farts on purpose,

and he's just dropped one.

Pete was like this in bed last night,

hysterically laughing at this video that my dad sent him,

of men doing like-

Trick shots.

Trick shots?

Yeah, it was sick.

It was funny, it was sick.

It was just the worst thing I've never seen, am I?

What I did wrong was Shabab.

She went like-

Pete was crying, laughing in bed.

I was like, what is this?

I thought it was brilliant.

Ah, God, that's ticklish.

That was a good message.

Babe, this is not the Peter Crouch podcast today, you know?

I didn't do it.

I just, you know, I don't know when farts are.

Can you do that on demand?

No, no, no.

I don't know, probably.

Do you want to read this last one?

I've got to get this off my chest.

My wife is amazing, and I do love her, but her lack of effort

and complete negligence towards stacking the dishwasher properly

is proper grinding on me.

We've been together nearly 15 years, married nine,

and it's getting progressively worse.

I joke about it, hoping she might take the hint,

but I'm getting nowhere.

It's pointless using the dishwasher

as we end up having to hand wash them as soon as,

hand wash them as soon as it's finished,

or fire them on another cycle,

which obviously costs more money.

It's going to end in tears sooner rather than later.

Ooh, dishwasher problems.

Ryan from Scotland.

Ryan.

I do like, I've just got to shut you in.

I think he should have emptied the, uh,

stack the dishwasher himself.

It's that much of a problem.

I thought that when I read the book.

So how dare you complain?

Do it yourself.

If this was a female writing this in, would you have said that?

No.

I would have said teach him,

give him a tutorial on how to stack the dishwasher properly.

Yeah, I don't know, I feel about this.

It's a difficult one to kind of rectify, isn't it?

I would just say to her, like, we're doing dishwasher.

Yeah, but you don't, you don't come near the dishwasher.

I do stack the dishwasher.

If I went away or something.

No, but that's the, like, I don't,

I don't do loads around the house, but I do do that.

But I won't.

Why do I keep singing all the time today?

Get rid of her, Ryan.

She sounds like, all right.

She sounds like a right pain in the ass.

Get rid, useless.

What do you think of today's pod?

Enjoy it.

Yeah, I think it's a bit random, as usual.

Always the best, always the best.

But I enjoyed it.

What's this?

You're my wrong model.

Thanks.

Now, you are, I joke about it,

but you are, you've got some great colleagues

that I try and aspire to.

I mean that.

Do you?

Yes, I do mean that.

And some of them, they are, some of them are hard at times,

but they've got a little flow on you.

But you are, you're inspirational to a lot of people

and to our children and to me.

Well, I hope we're good role models.

I like to think our children look up to us and go,

you know, my mum and dad are great.

They're in love, they're fun, they love us,

they work hard to give us everything we've got and, you know.

I'd love to think that.

But I don't think they probably do.

Which is a shame.

I think the little ones would.

The older one.

Deep down, I think they would.

Yeah.

Deep down.

All right.

All right, love on down, babe.

See you next week.

See you next week.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.