Les Grosses Têtes: PÉPITE - Les blagues de Jean-Marie Bigard à Châlons

This Labor Day at the Home Depot we're rolling out store-wide savings like a new lower price of

$99 on the Ryobi OnePlus 18 volt two-tool kit because we see long weekends as an opportunity to power up your projects

With the OnePlus battery system that works on over 280 products and counting

All driving you to do more this Labor Day at the Home Depot

Get the Ryobi OnePlus 18 volt two-tool kit for a new low price of $99 the Home Depot

How doers get more done?

Monsieur Bigard, you're impatient to tell us a new story

No, but I wanted to talk a little bit about the drink because we're still in the corner, we're talking about the champagne and everything

And there's a guy who comes in a bar and he's pretty happy and says to the boss

When you call the boss, he says I'm called Pierre

He says to me I'm called Gerard

So you put a barrel to Pierre, you put a barrel to Gerard

And you put a barrel to everyone in the bar, the general tour

The bell and everything, everyone drinks a cup

They're almost done, he addresses his new boss and says you're paying already

He says he's always called Pierre

He says to me I'm called Gerard

So you put a barrel to Pierre, you put a barrel to Gerard

And you put a barrel to everyone in the bar, yeah

In the bistro, he's acclaimed after they've finished their glass

He addresses his new boss and says how do you call the boss?

He says you're kidding me, I'm called Pierre

He says to me I'm always called Gerard

So you know what you're going to do

You put a barrel to Pierre, a barrel to Gerard

And you put a barrel to everyone

At the end of the 8th general tour

There's Pierre who worries a little bit, you see he's going to see Gerard

He says Gerard, well we're friends now

But you know you owe me 990 euros

And the other one says you'll excuse me Pierre

But I know I'm going to disappoint you, but I don't have a barrel

Nothing, you can fool me all the time

He's in fury, he catches Gerard, he puts his head down

He's in fury, he's in fury, he's in fury

He's in fury, he's in fury

He's in fury, he's in fury, he's in fury

He's in fury, he's in fury

And 3 months go by

And Gerard comes back to the bistro

And he addresses the guy

He says how do you call the boss?

The other guy says my name is Pierre

And he says my name is Gerard

So you're going to put a barrel to Gerard

And a barrel to everyone in the bar

And Pierre is in fury, he says

And I put my head down and he says

No, but you, when you're drunk, you're bad

History, Jean-Marie

He's a guy who's drunk, he's drunk

He's a faithful husband, he's all drunk

But fortunately, in the car lights, he sees a woman

Who's in front of her car's wheel, who's manifestly dead

And he stops, because he's a good guy

And he says let me help you

He changes the car's wheel, she's sublime

The girl says, I don't know how to thank you

If you want, I'll offer you a glass at home

He looks at his watch, he says OK, why not

But not for a long time, he goes home

She's going to wear a transparent dress

And all, and she sits next to him

And she starts to...

Slowly, he...

You know, he's a little bit shabby

He wears a lot of clothes

He's in love with a banquet, he's in the bedroom

And all of a sudden, he looks at his watch

And it's two o'clock in the morning

What am I going to say?

He says, fuck my wife

And he says, what can I do for you?

He says, give me a piece of blue chalk

And he puts a little bit of it on his shoulders

A little bit on the sleeves of his suit

And his wife, he's in the bathroom

Two o'clock in the morning, he doesn't give a shit

What have you done?

Well, he says, listen

I'm not going to lie to you, I went home

There was a sublime woman

Who had just died with her bath

I didn't expect anything at all

I never saw my life, my life at home

She comes back half naked

She throws herself on me

I think it's a real story

And his wife, she looks at her

She says, stop your bullshit, you idiot

You were still making a beer with your friends

That's it

But I'm not going to lie to you

I'm not going to lie to you

Ah!

Thank you, I want Marie to have kissed me

It's the guy who says, I'm sick

You see, he can't find it

I'm on his feet, as he says

He says, go ahead, let's start from the beginning

You start, what do you like about a woman?

He says, big breasts

I love, I love big breasts

No, but he says, the doctor says

To have a serious relationship, you see

With a durable relationship

With a woman, he says, big breasts

Big breasts

Big breasts

I love big breasts

You see, tell me

The doctor said, he said a little

He thought to me

Saying that a woman who would make you

Children, you see

And with whom you could spend

The rest of your life

He said, spend the rest of my life

No woman

Has these big breasts

She's finished

She's finished

Wait, I turn the page

I think she's finished

That's funny

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.