ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 9th September 2023

At Pennzoil, we have one job.

Pioneering a motor oil so advanced,

you don't have to think about your motor oil.

Instead, you can think about how your engine sounds,

how your stomach feels as the RPMs build,

how your wheels hug the curves,

and how, with the Pennzoil Platinum up to 15-year,

500,000 mile protection guarantee,

your adventures will be many.

Pennzoil, long may we drive.

Find it at Firestone Complete AutoCare.

Enrollment required. Keep your receipts.

Other conditions applied.

See Pennzoil.com slash warranty for full details.

The ZM Podcast Network.

Fleshworn and Haley's Little Bit of Pod.

Treat yourself to McCafe coffee with my Mac's rewards.

Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod.

Now, Vaughn Smith's got no time for bullshit,

counseled bullshit.

Hattus Crowell's got no time for that bullshit either.

Yeah, well, as you're doing renovations, you...

But see, I'm nearly through the wall.

Been there doing that. Yeah.

Yeah, there are a lot of counsel inspections

when you do renovations and buildings and...

I understand why there must be inspections,

because, you know...

Keep us safe.

And if something happens, then I've given it the tick,

and then you get the insurance payout and stuff,

all that jazz.

But, I mean, anyone that's lived in a leaky home

and dealt with builders in the past that have cut corners,

wishes there were more...

Wishes there were checks.

You've got a resource management act situation

on your hands there.

It's got its goods and its bads.

Now, we did our bathrooms, going back a little bit.

Renaud, yeah.

Easily towards the start of last year.

We got something in the mail a little while ago saying,

hey, you've never got the final code of compliance sign-off

for your bathroom.

So, we've just been rocking around

in the uninsurable bathrooms.

Goodness me.

Basically. Yeah, right.

And so, a little while ago, someone came out and they said,

oh, there was an inspection, and they said,

the only thing you fail on is that you're hot.

What is coming out of the tap too hot?

Too hot. Oh, yeah.

It could be 55 degrees. Yeah.

And you're at 62.

Now, somebody then said, and then months later,

we got another one saying,

we want to repeat and revisit this hot water tap,

and we need all of the paperwork in triplicate.

Now, this is the paperwork issued by the council.

You would think they, as the issuers,

would have access to the paperwork,

but they want us to print it out at our own expense

on A3 in triplicate.

In A3.

Now, you're taking a trip to Bloody Warehouse Station.

Now, you've not just been able to jam that

in the diskjet, A-speech, B-diskjet.

So, unless you do two A4s and salitate them together.

Well, that's true.

They always feel a little white margin as well.

Yeah, you're going to trim it.

They didn't tell us about the triplicate.

Okay.

And so they arrived, I'd turned the water right down.

Wait, had they told you about the triplicate,

but you didn't read it? No, no, no.

They hadn't told us about the triplicate.

They told the people who had made the bathrooms

about the triplicate, who told us they were coming.

We didn't know about the triplicate.

So then they show up, a lady shows up,

and Shade said, I don't know, she'd had a bad day.

She wasn't like, she'd never smile on her face.

She wasn't loving work that day.

She was a bitch.

Yep.

I'll say it.

She was a bitch.

I feel like I might know this bitch.

Everyone knows our bitch like this bitch.

And a bastard like this bastard.

Oh, of course.

This is not a gender specific situation.

If you've got a prick as an inspector,

you've got a prick as an inspector.

Yeah.

Now, so this one turns up and she said,

where's your paperwork and triplicate?

To what Shade's like, I'm not sure of where that is.

And the woman's like, well, we need it.

And Shade said, well, that's your paperwork.

Could you access it?

And she was like, no.

Shade's like, okay, I'm going to ring the bathroom,

people all get this all sorted.

And to which they say, it needs to be printed off.

And Shade's like, I can print it off.

And they said an A3.

And Shade said, I cannot print on A3.

And the lady said, that's fine.

I can see the paperwork later.

But also your water is half a degree too hot.

Half a degree.

Wow.

Yeah, it's got to be 55 or under.

It's got no room for error.

To which Shade calls me and I said,

lean up in the cupboard now and there's a dial

and just crank it left.

It'll drop by 20 degrees.

But that's all you need to pass.

It doesn't matter if it's 25 degrees

coming out of the tap, as long as it's under 55,

there's no minimum.

And we'll crank it back up.

Because there's a hot water cylinder at 60,

we'll crank it back up later.

But there should be a minimum

because of Legionnaires disease.

Well, there's a minimum of the water

that's sitting in that hot water cylinder,

which is always at 60, by default.

Right.

So I said, and Shade said,

I'm just going to crank this dial

and the lady says, I'm sorry, no.

And you have failed.

Well, I'll say it again.

She sounds like a bitch.

So that was frustrating to say the least.

Now, it's a come and we get another date

for another check.

So I literally the night before crank the cold water,

crank the hot water down.

It is now sitting at about 28 degrees.

That's lukewarm.

Yeah.

That's tepid.

Yeah.

That's swimming pools get hotter than then summer.

Yeah.

It's awfully cold.

So and Shade has made a special trip

to get triplicate printouts.

Oh, lovely.

Of the paperwork.

Yeah.

And the guy, he's like, I'm sorry.

I'm running early.

It's eight o'clock still OK.

And Shade's like, that's fine.

That actually works better

because I could take the kids to school afterwards.

And then she gets out of A3s.

She gets to A3s really.

Yeah.

That's nice.

Water at not even hot.

Yeah, good.

Ready for the inspector.

You guys, I got a feeling you guys are passing at this.

You're saying I'm getting a good feeling here.

He comes to the door, knock at knock, knock.

Yeah.

And Shade says hello.

Oh, he's a bitch, isn't he?

No.

Oh.

He says hello, good morning.

And she's like, oh, this is a friendly man.

Yeah.

Not a bastard.

Not a bastard.

And she's holding the paper and he's like,

what have you got there?

And she said, copies and triplicate.

He's like, I don't need to see that.

Oh, I'm human.

I'm human.

We've got all that on file.

Yes, I know you do.

I know you do.

I know.

I know.

Hey, you're fucking papers.

Of course, you've got them on file.

And so he said, oh, so I see here last time,

the water was a bit hot.

And Shade said, yes.

And he's like, that then turned down.

And Shade said, yeah, my husband turned it down

in the hot water cup.

And he's like, I don't see any reason I even need to come in.

Oh, for God's sake.

You're absolutely.

Sign, blip, blip, blip.

You'll get an email soon.

You've got a good guy.

You've got a good guy.

Yeah, I know, but when was he the first time?

When was he the first time?

Where's the consistency?

And I want the consistency to be like him, not like her.

Also, having printed lots of A3 stuff for building inspections

and for builders and stuff, it's not cheap.

No.

For some reason, you double the paper, double the price.

By the way, you can do it at work.

Oh.

Wow.

When I say you can do it at work,

if you've got the file, you send it to Shannon and ask her

nicely to do it.

Yeah, Shannon, she's good.

She's a good bitch.

Yeah, she's a good bitch.

Yeah, she's a good bitch.

Because then, Shannon said, I work the printer.

When they look at who's printing the most,

Shannon gets in trouble.

Well, she's also a producer.

She prints out all of the stuff.

Yeah, she's printing out.

Listen to all this paper.

She's printing this morning.

Yeah, all the reading stuff.

She's pretty, but she's got no respect for the truth.

Read this ad.

Read this ad.

So how about that?

Nothing.

I mean, I'd rather it went this way, to be honest.

Yeah, yeah.

Because everything else has been signed off.

It's over now.

It's just the fact that the water was a little bit too hot.

A little bit too hot.

So I've cranked it, and fuck is that hot water.

You're just going to notice those burns on your arms.

Yeah, I'm good.

Love hot water.

Yeah, you do too.

I'm going to burn my kuchy in your shower before.

It's too hot for the kuchy.

I always said you should turn the shower on with the removable

shower head and get it to the temperature.

You just put it right in front of your vagina,

and you're like, it's like a game of Russian relics.

Don't go straight to the kuchy without testing the water first.

Yeah, you're right.

That's where I stuffed up.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.