ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 8th September 2023

Welcome to today's A Little Bit of Pod. Today's following pod are mentions.

Don't say it because there's a what you're getting now. This is technically the warning for the warning.

This has happened before. It's too much. So we're only doing...

But I can use a technical term. Genitals.

There's genital chat. Yeah. And sexual actions towards those genitals.

But not seeing the sexual nature. It is screamed.

Yeah. It's an aggressive screaming of a genital nature.

So the next warning and the following pod cast is not suitable for young ears.

Or sensitive ears or prudes.

Welcome to today's A Little Bit of Pod. Now a slight warning.

We've just recorded it. Now we've come back to the start.

And we do want to warn you that there is mention of sucking balls.

Oh no, no, no, no. We always do this.

Now we've got to put a warning in front of the warning.

Our warnings always need a warning.

I would just say that there's... Okay, we'll go.

Okay, so now if you're hearing this, we're about to go back and do the first ever one you heard.

Okay. Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod.

Gaze. Gaze. I had a celebrity sighting.

Not both of us, but go on.

Multiple. Multiple celebrity sightings.

Gaze. Gaze. Gaze.

So I was in Invercargill, right? And I got there.

And the woman, we'd had separate flights.

So Dye Henwood and Ben Hurley, they went early, right?

And then we turned up the rest of us.

And the woman goes, oh my God, it's celebrity day here at Invercargill Airport.

And we were like, stop, stop, stop, stop.

And then she got photos of us, Jeremy Corbett, Paul Ego, me, da, da, da, da.

Very exciting.

Nick Minut, Rhys Darby turns up in Invercargill Airport.

For overseas pod cast, this is Flight of the Concords.

Flight of the Concords.

He's Murray.

Yeah.

He's Murray.

One of our proudest exports.

Yeah.

He's the same person in everything you've seen him in.

Same character.

Oh, don't scream your face.

Oh, no.

Shots fired.

Shots fired.

Anyway, Rhys Darby turns up and we're like, oh, hello.

And he comes to say hello because he's friends of lots of comedians I'm hanging out with.

And so, you know, celebrity sighting.

Oh my God, that's weird.

Invercargill Airport, again for our international listeners, Invercargill sucks.

It's like the bottom of New Zealand.

Who wheezes?

It's shit.

It's shit.

Who called it the asshole of New Zealand?

No, that was Gore.

No, John Cleese from Palmerston North.

Rolling Stones called Mick Jagger.

Mick Jagger called it the asshole of the world.

It's surrounded by beauty.

It is surrounded by beauty.

You know, there are some incredible beaches and walks and stuff.

Yeah, but what do you like about Invercargill itself?

Wide roads.

They predicted the future.

They predicted the future.

No, it's not shit.

They really built themselves up for a boomer.

Invercargill is...

And it's got a...

Instant coffee was invented there.

No, it wasn't.

It was free-dried.

It was free-dried.

Instant coffee was invented in Invercargill.

Bullshit.

Fuck you both.

Where was instant coffee invented?

Invercargill, New Zealand.

You both can suck my cock and my balls.

Wait, you want us to suck your balls?

Let my asshole.

It's on the balls.

I don't want the balls.

Oh, tongue the balls.

I'm not sucking the balls.

Suck the balls.

No, I'll suck the cock.

I won't do the balls.

Suck the balls.

I'm not doing the balls.

Come on.

Don't suck them hard, but suck the balls.

This is...

Has this been effective today?

It really should be.

It has been.

Thanks for listening.

Fuck you.

Maybe we need coffee week for...

Look, the fact that we don't know...

That would actually be really interesting.

So instant or soluble coffee was invented and patented in 1890 by David Strang of Invercargill,

New Zealand under the patent number blah, blah, blah.

Under the trading name Strang's Coffee, citing the patented dry hot air process.

We apologize.

What the actual if?

We apologize.

Are you kidding me?

How is there not a coffee museum down there?

How is there not like a thing?

How is it not a thing?

Because there's nothing down there.

That's what I was trying to say.

There's not much happening in Invercargill.

And they are the but of many guys.

Our podcast listeners from Invercargill, we welcome you.

And I know...

I think down there is...

It's beautiful.

It's wild, man.

Like to a topri where we put a sausage up.

And then we went down to that beach on the south and it was just like everything was being hammered.

Like, yeah.

We're a really wild place to visit.

And I really want to get to Stewart Island.

Stewart Island rules.

Stewart Island is an Invercargill.

That's the point.

The actual township of Invercargill is a bit boring.

And I know that's where Rhys Darby was.

So this is where Rhys Darby was.

We're in Invercargill.

And then all these comedians, celebrities are in Invercargill, right?

So that everyone's fizzing.

Guess who else is in fucking Invercargill Airport?

Where coffee was invented.

David Hasselhoff.

The hoff.

The hoff is there.

For overseas listeners, imagine like a regional airport in the middle of nowhere.

That's like...

That's Invercargill Airport's life.

It's not a hub.

It's not a hub.

It's a tiny airport.

It might see like three or four flights a day.

Yeah, totally.

Regional flights.

Maybe the odd jet flight.

But yeah, it's small.

And so Rhys Darby and David Hasselhoff.

David Hasselhoff.

So I've heard rumors that the hoff has been in Stewart Island.

So they've come up from there, right?

Yeah.

And he's been hanging out with Rhys Darby.

So that makes sense.

Are they like scouting a movie?

Or are they just friends in their own holiday?

Well, I know, but I can't say.

I know, but I can't say.

Can I turn the mics off and you just tell Vaughn and I?

Yeah.

Oh.

No, that's what I...

That was my guess.

Really?

That's what I thought.

Okay, right.

Yeah.

Okay.

Wow.

So that's my idea.

Anyway, David Hasselhoff.

Also for $5 on PayPal.

Oh, if you message me on Instagram, I will tell you what Rhys Darby and...

No, because now they know that I'm the source.

David Hasselhoff.

What they were doing there.

I'll tell you.

All right.

So you're saying...

Well, should I go $4.99?

Yeah, it makes it seem more like it's $4, even though it's definitely $5.

Even though it's $5.

Okay, for $4.99, I'll tell you what they were doing.

Can I also just apologize for screaming suck my dick and my balls?

No, don't apologize for wanting to have your balls sucked.

Yeah, things got a bit wild.

They got wild.

They got wild.

I just felt like you really pooped me.

And literally, what we was instant coffee invented at Invercargo was in bold at the top.

Yeah.

There's no question about it.

We'll go now as we wrap up this little bit of pot and make an intro.

I think we should.

Because there's a lot of sucking balls.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Which I gotta say has never been my thing.

Sucking on the balls.

No, no, when the balls...

You just don't do that.

You just suck on the balls.

I'll play with the balls.

I'm not gonna suck them.

Well, that's a whole area.

It's its own area.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.