ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Lil Bitta Pod - 26th October 2023

Welcome to A Little Bit of Pod.

Now last night, long time listeners to the show will know that over the years, I have

provided Hayley Jane Sproul with a lot of Hydro-Cortisone cream.

Yep, I'm always a rashie.

I get rashie, man.

Yeah, because a long time ago I had a prescription prescription prescription prescription prescription

pre-scription.

Yeah, it's before the prescription.

So it's a pre-scription.

I had a pre-scription for a lot of it and it just sat in a drawer and then you got,

you get quite rashie.

I was back in the thigh rash and we were going out and I was like hon and then you gave me

some expired cream and you cleared it up.

And then just at the weekend, I was cleaning out that drawer, you know where you put all

the prescriptions and the pills and ointments and plasters and I had a lot of tubes of

Hydro-Cortisone and they were expired by like six months.

I was like, I'm not, I don't need these.

I'm chucking them out.

Hayley's good.

She's got her creams.

She's got her own stuff.

And then yesterday, I took my watch off and it was itchy and I was like, I've got a rash.

Look, Vaughn.

Oh no, he basically died.

That's where my watch goes.

That's where my watch goes.

Do you want to do the eulogy?

Vaughn, or should I do it?

I could die.

I'll sing.

You sing Sarah McLaughlin, Angels.

In the arms of the angel.

Okay.

I'm actually...

He was a grumpy old prick.

I was wanting some nice things.

Scabby.

Scabby.

He was a scabby old bastard.

He was a scabby old piece of shit.

Scabby old prick.

It's from Sweeting Under Your Apple Watch.

Yeah.

Yeah, so what I've done is I'm...

You don't want a flesh-eating bacteria getting in there.

Well, you know, so I've put my watch on my other hand and it's fucking weird.

Oh, I'm a right-hand guy.

I'm a right-hand guy.

And it is weird going to left.

Because no, but I'm weird on my left because I'm right-handed.

But to your left-handed, you wear it on the right.

You should...

I'm right-handed and I wear it on my right.

Do you know Vaughn's MBDX stress?

Not for everything.

Not for writing, but for everything.

Do you mix it up when you...

Predominantly on the right.

Even though you're left-handed?

Yeah.

Me too.

Predominantly left-handed even though I'm right.

So weird, eh?

And if I try with the left, I'm like, what's up?

Do you think that's purely just like the first way you ever play with yourself is from hence

forth out how you play with yourself?

I don't know.

Yeah, I'd like to know that.

It just feels the right way.

Mix it up, guys.

Mix it up.

You mix it up.

It feels like a stranger's doing it if you do it with your other hand.

Mix it up.

Yeah, okay.

But anyway, this bitch...

She brings in some...

And I do appreciate you bringing in some...

That's exactly how I...

That's exactly how I...

That's exactly how I pre-word any appreciation.

You know the...

Ah, this bitch!

My mother!

What a woman!

What a woman!

Raise me to the man I am.

This bitch!

I messaged her last night and I'm like, can you bring in some Hydro-Cortisone cream?

I get it.

And I...

You know, you have to squint to get the expiry date on...

Oh shit, how old is that?

21!

April 21!

Yeah.

Oh yeah.

This isn't gonna fucking work!

It's not gonna work!

I've got like five tubes of these and I just grabbed one of them.

So this will be one of the oldest ones.

I'll bring you a new one, Hon.

No, I'll just buy it.

No, fuck, take this.

It's fine.

You can buy that at the pharmacy.

You can use this.

I thought that you needed a pre-scription.

Hon, this is October 18.

No, look at the other side.

As in...

The top.

It expires April the 20...

Year 21.

Oh, you can use it.

So we said it was a manky tube.

I actually gave it a bit of a wipe before I gave it to him.

Because the ointment of the hydrocortisone really collects like bag crumbs.

Yeah, right.

And often you'll unscrew it and it'll be like dust and...

Go on to a handbag.

Yeah.

It's a manky handbag.

It's a blue tobacco leaves and God knows what else.

Do you know Haley's got a secret compartment where she keeps a pack of sickies?

Disgusting!

What?

Dis-batch!

I was about to ask what brand, but I don't even want to know.

So minty-methyl.

Minty-methyl.

Minty-methyl.

Minty-methyl.

Minty-methyl.

I meant the old to avoid a minty-b.

If ever I'm having a little bubble and cusp of a minty-b and I'm gonna come...

Fuck you.

I'm allowed to do what I want.

Smoke some chewing gum.

Yeah.

Just smoke a bit of cheddar.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.