ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 5th September 2023

Kia ora koutou katoa. Blaise here from Burnett Foundation Aotearoa.

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Good morning. Welcome to the show, Fletch, Vaughan and Hailey.

Two minutes past six. Hailey joins us from a, I believe, a Wellington studio.

Yes, indeed, a studio with a beautiful king bed behind it.

Wouldn't that be nice in our studio?

A king bed, just for naps.

For a little lion.

Yeah.

I don't know, I see all these new podcasts, everybody's sitting on a couch.

I don't know why we're still sitting beside this hard-formed Micodesk.

We should be on couches.

Yeah, I think we can evolve as a show.

No, I think we get up too early. I'd snoot.

You need to be a Rectus at this time.

But I am and I'm in Wellington.

I had a great show at the Michael Fowler last night, one of my favourite venues.

You were on the Seven Days Tour in Invercargill tonight?

Invercargill tonight. Good morning to our Invercargill listeners.

Can't wait to be there.

Hope you've got your puffy jacket. It's going to be gold.

Yeah, I do. I've got my sheepskin-lined guy.

She's ready. She's prepared.

Was that your leather jacket?

Yes. Yeah, I didn't bring a puffer.

Not enough suitcase room.

Well, the high today is 15 degrees in Invercargill.

What?

Tomorrow it's going to be 17.

Oh, that's all good.

Absolutely fine.

That's barmy. That's tropical.

Yeah. Oh, currently two degrees.

Yeah.

This is going on here in Invercargill.

Soon on the show, the top six.

Yeah, the top six signs that the Ford Ranger was the best new-selling car in August.

It was apparently a pretty slow month for new car sales.

Right.

But the obnoxious Ford Ranger was the top.

Why don't you like those? I think they're cool.

I'd have one of those.

I think they're cool too.

I think they're cool.

I think they're cool.

I just think it's the sort of person that drives ones.

Probably more of the problem than the vehicles.

OK.

It sounds like someone's jealous they don't have a Ford.

When there's an asshole, it's 85% chance it's a Ford Ranger doing the activity.

Yeah, but that's only because Jimneys that you drive, the Suzuki Jimney,

doesn't go past 85.

Well, I get out of the way.

I get out of the way.

It's got to be deep.

Don't get out of the way though, Vaughan.

We know you don't.

Well, I can't get out of the way.

You've spent the fast lane too long.

You're so far up my arse and the person on the left lane,

they're going the same speed as me.

I literally have nowhere to go because you're so close behind me.

I can't drop in behind the person behind me.

Don't start in the fast lane.

Get out from the start lane.

That's my only chance.

That's my only chance.

Well, the top six, what is this dealing with?

The top six?

Well, I've already told you.

I won't say it again.

No, what?

I already told you.

I mean, he wasn't clear enough, was he?

No.

What is the top six?

It was the top six signs that the Ford Ranger was the best-selling car in August.

I said it right at the top.

No, he said it was the best-selling car in August,

but then he didn't say what the top six was.

No, I said the top six signs it was the best-selling car in August.

I said it, check the taste.

He wasn't clear.

He wasn't clear.

Check the taste.

Check the taste.

You guys have got to listen.

He wasn't clear.

Losing your minds.

Well, now that it's been cleared up,

this would happen if we were sitting in a couch comfortably relaxing

and listening to our friend talk.

Taylor Swift tickets again today.

It's your last week, the last few days,

so make sure you're listening at eight,

midday, and four for those Taylor Swift songs to be in to win.

Next on the show, a woman's gone viral

for something she's done at a supermarket.

This is in America.

I think this is genius.

I'll say it now, genius,

but I think it's shoplifting.

Do you?

I think it's shoplifting.

Interesting.

Well, a woman in the USA has caused a bit of controversy.

She's gone viral on TikTok.

She is at a Walmart,

which is like for those that don't know,

like I guess being at the warehouse or K-Mart.

K-Mart or a warehouse?

They sell groceries.

They sell lots of things.

They sell guns.

Everything you can.

Have you been into a Walmart?

Yeah, that's where you got your Dolly Parton T-shirt from.

Yeah, I got an eight dollar Dolly Parton T-shirt

from Do Not Put It In The Dryer.

Is that an excuse?

No, no, no, no, no.

It's the minute you pick the material up,

you're like, oh, this is eight dollars for a reason.

This must never see the dryer.

Yeah, okay.

Yo, don't wash it, Vaughan.

Don't wash, yeah.

Don't wash.

Don't wash it either.

Wash it in a river on some rocks.

Yeah, they're wild places.

Now, the TikTok that's gone viral shows a woman

with like a big container of liquid soap,

the kind of soap you'd put into a fancy ASOP container.

Yeah, right, palm oil.

Yeah, I was going to say, is it cheap soap?

Yeah, it looks like cheap soap.

Dorn.

Now, she's trying.

Dorn is a great.

That is a phenomenal dish soap.

Do we have this here?

A phenomenal dish soap.

And it makes the best bubbles.

Like if you were going to put it in a bubble wand,

it makes phenomenal bubbles.

I feel like it'll really aggravate my eczema

inbetween my fingers.

It probably will.

You know, it's got that vibe.

It'll strip the skin.

Yeah, well, it's very pink, this stuff that I'm looking at.

So, she claims this woman that she's getting ripped off

buying a giant bottle,

which looks like maybe a litre and a half,

a litre of soap.

And there's a big, like maybe an inch and a half gap at the top.

So, she opens another bottle

and pours in the liquid soap to the tippity top,

puts the lid on and then buys that bottle.

I know, I don't think you're going to do that.

Yeah, mate, do it.

Why not?

You are not.

It is 100% shoplifting.

I don't think that's it.

Because as people are pointing out on the comment section,

like you, there's an air gap for a reason.

Like there's a reason.

What's the reason?

In case you take it on an airplane?

No, because apparently during like transportation,

the air kind of helps it.

Otherwise, they just pop and bubble everywhere.

Yeah, a bit, yeah, too much.

People saying you're paying for the volume.

They fill it and weigh it.

So, whatever the liquid or the volume is,

they say on the container, that's what you're getting.

Yes.

The machine at the factory pumps the right amount in.

Sometimes.

Sometimes I don't think I'm getting my 400 ml, you know?

Yeah, but are you measuring?

Are you checking?

I guess we don't check, do we?

I've got a way more exciting life than measuring my liquids.

I'll be honest.

Yeah, and I mean, she's probably doing it

to get what, like 20, 30 cents more soap.

Couple of pumps though.

That's a couple of washes.

That's a couple of big pot washes.

It is. It's a couple of washes.

Like, yes, yeah.

Good for her.

But I would say do not do this.

So, she put the video of herself doing this online

and wasn't somebody else's video doing it.

And she's like, check out this woman.

Yeah, she's literally,

she knows what she's doing.

She's doing this to a crime.

Criminated herself.

Yeah, she's contentious.

Wow.

I mean, because the only thing,

the only problem is that it leaves someone shorthand it.

Right?

We get the next person,

what are they going to buy a bottle with an inch less size?

It's just, it's a ripple effect

because they'll have to top up from another bottle

and then another bottle, another bottle.

And there's wastage each time you do it.

So, I get that it's not good.

Yeah.

All right.

I'm inspired.

Twelve past six.

I'm inspired by it.

Soon on the show, the top six, but not next.

Yeah.

Soon on the show.

I don't know.

I just need to remind you

because you both, I told you three times last time.

Well, you weren't clear about.

What's he doing again?

Something about plants.

Yeah, he's doing something about plants.

Something about plants.

That's about the Ford Ranger.

It's the Ford Ranger was the best-selling new Claren.

He just wasn't clear.

Was a slow knife for new cars.

Okay.

Right.

The top six signs of wars.

I still feel like I'm not clear on what it is.

Okay.

Well, it's coming up apparently.

Yeah.

Some, some, they will say something.

Now, apparently up next, a lot of people,

the cost of living is impacting a lot of people

and it's coming for our love lives.

I believe lots of dating apps do this.

Bumble definitely does.

They do their sex index every year.

We've definitely talked about it before, haven't we?

They do stats of like, well, how are we dating

and who are we dating and how's it going and whatnot.

Great stats.

Perhaps I'll scatter them throughout the week.

Okay.

Because one of the things they looked at,

I love the single and kind of Ford to mingle,

is how the cost of living is impacting our dating life.

And the obvious one, right, is like,

we don't have as much money because life costs more

and so we can't afford to go on nice big lavish dinner dates

anymore.

So people are doing boring things like walks in the park.

Like, you know, so be yoga classes and all that kind of.

Yeah.

Possess.

I don't need to see,

people don't need to be seeing me sweaty

and stretching in a park doing yoga.

There.

I really don't.

No.

Yeah.

They really, really don't.

They really.

Not really on.

No.

You save that.

But there are a few of them.

You save the sweetness.

Yeah.

It's not even sexy, sweaty.

It's just manki.

Like pungi, sweaty.

But some of the other stats are really, really interesting,

like how the cost of living is affecting dating.

One of the stats said 65% of young singles

can't afford to move out of their family home,

which obviously has resulted in a

far less exciting and vigorous sex life.

Because if you meet someone and you want to go home with them,

you can't.

Absolutely.

At least your appearance are okay with you bringing people home.

Did you guys ever,

I mean, because I didn't date, so to speak,

when I was still living under my parents' roof.

No, never.

So I never had to bring someone home.

Were you allowed to bring people back to the caravan form?

I didn't ask.

I didn't ask.

You didn't ask.

I just took them home, man.

Oh, you're a bad boy.

He's a bad guy.

Yeah.

Another side of it is the psychological

impact of the cost of living.

So people more strained, more stressed,

and the biggest psychological killer of arousal is stress.

Yeah, right.

So people are just not getting down to Funky Town

because they're just like,

oh my God, I've got to think about them all.

I've got to have this.

Like, nothing sexy about having a conversation

with your partner about how you're going to pay rent that week.

Yeah, you're not going to get straight into it after that, are you?

Although maybe your solution to how you're going to pay rent

is finally launching that only fans you've been talking about.

And then your partner could be like,

oh, this is a bit sexy.

They could be a photographer.

Yeah, OK.

Yeah, right.

Well, you know I've been thinking about it.

You just know I've been thinking about it.

Well, you've got those sexy feet, don't you?

I do, do a lot of times.

And then another one is that people in long-term relationships

are having more strain on their sex life and their dating life

because people are losing their jobs.

And so they're going, oh, now I've got to cover you

a little bit more.

And that's leaving me financially strained

and I can't do my fun activities

that I like to do on my own that don't involve you.

Yeah.

And it's just put a lot of strain on us in general.

You basically also just described having children.

Oh, my God.

I would say this to Josh Thompson yesterday

because he was just in a real loving moment with his kids.

And his kids are so cute.

He's kept being like, look at that.

That's so cute.

I was like, yeah, cute.

I was like, are they annoying though?

He's like, oh, yeah.

Very expensive.

It was really annoying.

And when they pulled the sheet,

you certainly wouldn't put up with many friends.

Oh, thank God they're cute.

If your friends behave like your children,

you'd definitely need new friends.

Oh, no need convincing me.

Hello there.

New car sales are a little slower in August.

That's because no one's got any money.

Yeah, that's that.

That's basically it, isn't it?

Yeah.

Well, at the top of the list is the Ford Ranger, the ute.

Despite the fact that this month also saw the Ford Ranger

recalled over a sudden stop issue.

That's right.

The word just suddenly stops.

So the Ford Ranger and the Ford Everest,

which is an SUV version of the Ranger basically,

there's a battery issue.

And if it's, if you're going at like walking pace,

it'll just jam it.

It'll just pop itself into park.

Oh, I hate that.

Oh, wow.

Okay.

Yeah.

At some battery,

if a battery drops below some critical threshold,

it will just be like, oh, I need to be in park,

blop, drop you into park.

And you can be like, if you're interested.

Too smart for its own good.

Sometimes these cars,

it's like the ones that like yank you back into the lane.

You're like, leave me alone.

Oh yeah, sometimes that's a little.

I didn't want to indicate.

Yeah, I want to drive off the road.

Calm down.

Yeah.

I'm a free woman.

I can do what I want.

Don't tell me what to do.

I was driving into a garage the other day

and the car was like, avoid crash

and just slammed on the brakes.

I was just slowly going into the garage.

Everybody just needs to calm down.

So first was Ford Ranger.

Second was RAV4,

the Toyota RAV4,

crazy the RAV4 back in the top 10.

Then the Hilux was third.

Right.

Then the Outlander,

the Mitsubishi Outlander,

the Eclipse Cross,

the Ford Everest for your mum

that also wants to be a bit adventurous.

Pump other cars in the car park.

The Celtos, the Swift, yeah.

But the, I've got the top six signs

that the Ford Ranger was the highest selling new car this month.

Number six on the list,

there's literally one up your arse right now.

Check your review mirror.

Yeah.

If you're in your car,

one is following you so closely,

you can't even see it's number plate.

It is classic.

Right up there.

If you slam in your brakes,

it's going to cut you in half.

Number five on the list of the top six signs

the Ford Ranger was the highest selling new car last month.

Check the next mobility park parking spot you see.

There'll be one in there.

No label to say they need to park there,

but they'll be parked there.

Why don't you wrongly...

Am I?

Tarnishing all...

Prove it.

Prove it.

Number four on the list of the top six signs

the Ford Ranger was a high selling new car last month.

The Trady that shows up late,

if he shows up at all,

is driving a shiny new one.

Oh yeah.

That hurts.

You know when a Trady has a brand new van or you,

you're just like, you charge too much.

Do you know that is literally like,

in small towns,

like the painter,

who has been painting forever,

who drives a 1983 Mitsubishi Delica,

covered in paint,

gets a new van,

everyone's like, no, you pay,

don't hire him, he charges too much.

So the guys had the same van for 30, 40 years,

finally upgrades,

worked hard, deserves that,

everyone's like, no, no, he's obviously charging too much.

Yeah, you better just have a work van.

She old van have a nice car at home

that not only sees you drive.

Number three on the list of the top six signs

the Ford Ranger is the highest selling new car last month.

If you're on a bike,

there's one behind you,

there's one in front of you,

and there's one on each side of you,

they're all screaming at you,

and you're in the bike lane.

That's happening right now

at every major city in the country.

I'll put money on it.

I'll put money on it.

Yeah.

Number two on the list of the top six signs

the Ford Ranger was a highest selling new car last month.

There's one in your supermarket car park,

parked on an angle,

taking up two spaces

when there's no other park.

They're good things sometimes.

No, he's on an angle.

No, they fit in the lines.

They fit in the lines.

They fit in the lines.

They fit in the lines.

They're going to breath you on that one.

But they're just like,

ah, blech, blech.

And number one on the list of the top six signs

the Ford Ranger was the highest selling new car last month.

Your farmer mate just upgraded to a new one,

and you said to him,

didn't you just get a new one?

And he said,

oh, I just upgraded because it made sense tax-wise.

Tax-wise.

Right.

A lot of things make sense.

Tax-wise when you're a farmer.

It's tax-wise.

That's today's top six.

He's something but miserable for you,

and I do apologise in advance.

Yep.

Apparently, according to a survey,

46% of us are bored at work

at least three days of the work week.

Totally bored, monotony.

Right.

They're just over it.

I mean, I think we're quite lucky

because we work short.

I don't speak to me.

I'm bored now.

OK, right.

I've been bored three days of the working week

so far, and we're only up to Tuesday.

Are you bored?

I'm bored.

Well, if I was there,

I've got a solution.

I came up with a really great game yesterday.

Right.

This is going to solve workplace boredom.

Yeah.

OK.

So, because as you know,

I'm on the Seven Days Live Tour

with a bunch of great Kiwi comedians,

and I was sitting at the desk next to Paul Ego,

and I had some chips because I was hungry.

Snack of Changies.

Oh, god, they're the best.

Which one, though?

She would have gone sour cream and chocolate.

No, I didn't get to choose

because it's on the rider.

It was just really salted.

I know, but I was hungry for chips.

Snack of Changies should have made

a hard stand against really salted.

Yeah.

And we've just not done one.

Yeah, good.

Controversial.

Anyway, so the game is Pick Up Chips,

and you will remember the great childhood game

of Pick Up Sticks

in which you tip out some sticks

and you've got to pick up a stick

without moving any of the other sticks.

Same theory.

You pour yourself a nice handful of chips,

and then one by one you each take a chip.

If you get the chip without the other chips moving,

you get to eat the chip.

But then what if you don't?

If you move the other chips,

you have to put it back.

Yeah, you've got to take your fingers off of it.

You've got to wash your hands first.

So everyone has to wash their hands.

Everyone's had a little finger on the chip, but that's—

Yeah, I don't know.

Everyone's finger on the chips.

It's just a game you play amongst friends.

Shouldn't it be on a plate?

Not your hand?

My hand's the plate.

We were born with these plates.

Yeah, but then everyone's—

These beautiful plates at the end of our arms.

We were born with plates in cutlery.

I have also found your chest is a pretty good plate

when you're lying on your back.

Oh, yeah, okay.

You can put things on your chest.

No, but I've got big baps in the way.

You can put them between.

No, that's going to be a sweaty chip now.

That's going to be a sweaty chip.

I don't know if you've thought this game through.

I really think it's a good game.

We've played it for a long time

because when we do sound check,

it gets a bit boring.

Right.

So we just play pick-up chips.

See, this could be the way to solve boredom at work.

It's not the way I've solved it.

You bored at work, you get yourself a nice bag of chips.

I thought a better way to cure boredom at work

would have been as soon as you've finished your work,

you can go home.

Yes.

Oh, my God.

Imagine how efficient

if all you had to do was prove that you were done your day,

you were finished your day, you'd done your work.

And then you could go.

Any compulsory business

had to happen between the hours of 9 and 11.

Well, that was what I was going to say.

You're always waiting for someone else

at work to do their thing

before you can do the next thing.

Meetings, everything compulsory.

What a great idea.

Or like phone calls.

I mean, maybe it gets diverted to your cell phone

so you can still deal with stuff,

but you don't have to be there.

Yeah, right.

You get your work so hard.

It wouldn't matter if we could deliver

the same amount of entertainment

in 30 minutes

then we could in this three hour show.

Man, we're just jammed.

At that 30, we'll be out of here.

Three hours.

I'm exhausted.

We would literally just talk.

Talk for 30 minutes.

Not put in any songs.

Right, and then just go home.

Just talk.

We'd be like, oh, this lady's filled up liquid soap.

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Have you guys heard

young people can't afford to date anymore?

Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Top six reasons.

It's a bit much.

Signs that would be hard for songs.

Never stop.

Never stop.

Never stop.

Never stop.

Never stop.

And then we'd be done by like 7.30, I reckon.

But then what's going to happen in call centres?

When we're all home for the day

and we need to call insurance

or the airline or whoever.

They've all gone home.

They come between the hours of 9-11.

It has to be there for 9-11.

We've sorted the work week.

I'm working.

Squeeze it in.

Don't do it in the airdbreak.

You'll be alright.

Yeah, between 9 and 5 anyway.

This is just a smaller window.

Silly, silly, silly.

That's a silly little poll.

Silly little poll.

Silly little poll.

Silly little poll.

Silly little poll.

Silly little poll.

Paid for your wedding.

Options.

My partner and I.

The parents or a combination of both.

OK.

Where do you want to start?

The lowest results?

Yep.

The parents.

8% of people.

Yeah, it's...

That's sort of...

Had the parents say for the wedding.

It's quite an old-fashioned thing now, isn't it?

That the father of the bride pays.

Was how tradition originally went?

37%.

So the second most popular is my partner and I.

But the most popular is a combination of the both.

54%.

Oh, OK.

There was money chucked in from a bit of everybody.

Yeah, right.

So, yeah, that's how we did it.

I would have thought a lot more from the parents.

OK.

You would have thought more people.

Yeah, yeah, maybe.

Maybe, maybe it is.

But it's like those stories in the New Zealand Herald

about a young couple buying a home with no help,

and then you get to the third paragraph

and you realise they had like $180,000 inheritance from somewhere.

Yeah, yeah.

And they're like, we did it on our own.

It's like...

Yeah, well, did you?

It was hard.

I feel like my parents...

My parents even wouldn't pay for my wedding

when the time comes.

So, we never did that, maybe.

But definitely, I feel like they chip in in ways, you know, like...

Yeah.

That help out.

But they've already said that Vaughan and I can stay at their house

when you're wedding time.

And then, why are you talking to them?

We haven't settled on the guest list.

It's going to be very small.

Now, Patsy is excited.

Patsy and Craig are excited.

I thought it was very nice for Patsy to say

Indian Orgas could be flower girls.

Yes, that was lovely.

Because I said, I think they were a bit old,

and she said, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Yeah.

No, no, it's no kids.

Oh, no, because they were bringing

a couple of friends each as well.

No kids.

To really pack out the life.

No kids.

I'm with Haley on this.

No kids.

No kids.

No kids.

No kids.

Yeah.

Ah, OK, some feedback.

Ashley said, I haven't been married yet.

It's not till February 2025,

but yeah, my partner and I are paying for it all.

Yeah, good.

OK.

Lisa.

Is this Grumpy Lisa?

Is this Grumpy Lisa?

What I know, is the message Grumpy?

Is she?

I write?

You know what?

I think it's Grumpy Lisa.

It's Grumpy Lisa.

It's Grumpy Lisa.

Married in the lounge.

Justin and the kids's witness is $220 all up.

It's Grumpy Lisa.

Yeah, I love that.

I think it's Grumpy Lisa.

It's Grumpy Lisa.

I love that.

Who cares?

How much you spend?

Yeah, that's good stuff.

Yeah.

Let's go.

I hope you just ran the vacuum around, though.

I reckon you'd probably want a vacuum and dust.

I reckon you'd even.

Put on a playlist or something on the UE Boom.

Yeah, put the UE Boom on.

We paid for the things we wanted.

Mum and Dad for the things they wanted.

Ah, this is Georgia.

What did they want, though?

I don't care what my parents want.

No, you see it in brackets.

IE bubbles and canapes are after the ceremony.

Oh, OK.

Well, you need bubbles and canapes.

Canapes.

Canapes.

Yeah, it's actually canapes.

It's canapes.

I do apologise.

Isn't it?

I've got to have been saying it wrong my whole life.

Yeah, yeah.

Jamie said half of the people come into their wedding

are our parents' friends.

The parents in-laws and us are all going thirds.

OK.

So there you go.

Your parents' friends.

Yeah, they like to show it off.

And if they're chipping in equally, you go.

When the parents are like,

we're inviting 20 or 30 of people we want there,

you're like, OK, well, you're paying for them.

Strong no from me.

Yeah, my parents said, how many people are we allowed?

And then when he said, you're allowed this many,

and they filled it up.

Yeah, I paid for my own.

We had separate receptions.

My parents sort of the after-party for our family

and his mum paid for his reception.

His what?

They had separate receptions.

Just family knock it on.

I've got to run the own Juliet situation.

He made it.

Yeah.

Mal said, I did.

Should have been a red flag from the start.

The bill for the wedding lasted longer than the marriage itself.

Yeah.

Mal, I'm sorry to hear that.

Yeah, Mal paid for the wedding.

Yeah, you and the majority of other people though.

I wanted a cheap budget wedding

and my mum wanted to throw the event of the century.

To this day, I have no idea of the cost

and I don't want to know,

so I don't feel guilty of how much money was spent,

even though it wasn't my choice

and it was what she wanted.

Epic day, but it was definitely more over the top

than I would have chosen to do it.

How interesting.

Is that because do you think mum

didn't get the wedding she wanted?

Maybe, maybe their financial situation had changed

and mum didn't get the wedding she wanted

and now she could afford to sort of like splash out on it.

Yeah.

Jessica, Hubs and I intend to pay for both

and both these appearance wanted to pay thirds with us.

For both?

Wanted to pay for both?

More than one wedding.

I don't know.

Maybe reception and ceremony or something like that.

But both these appearance wanted to pay thirds with us.

I meant we had to invite a bunch of their friends

but it also meant we didn't have to completely

clarify our house savings to do it.

Yeah, small price to pay.

Carly says weddings are a scam.

Not wrong.

Yeah.

There's a story there.

It sounds like there's some hurt.

A story there.

It sounds like someone's been hurt.

Yeah.

There you go.

Haley, people are getting married.

That wasn't the point of this, was it?

Apart from Carly.

Apart from Carly.

She's standing strong on the fact that weddings are a scam.

But you are going to need to sort your wedding

because Maureen and I have non-refundable flights.

I don't have flights.

Well, you want to get those sort of love.

You want to knock on any cheaper.

This has been brought to our attention

by Shannon at the Social Media Desk

who was perusing TikTok.

She's a lolly lover.

She's a lolly lover.

She loves a lolly.

And a TikTok time spender.

So she found this and we're on board

because NZ Gems, a TikTok user, said

they cater to all demographics

and that's why I love this store so much.

Bro's allergic to inflation.

Here are the prices at Arotatuna Food Mart in Hamilton.

And it's this massive wall of lollies.

And I tell you what, very well-priced lollies.

And the selection is insane.

All right.

So we've found a place that has cheap lollies.

Yes.

This is great news.

Yeah.

And these times.

What are warheads?

Warheads.

They were like salad, super salad lollies.

I loved warheads.

Yeah.

So there's just this massive wall of lollies

and it's all like a lot of them are 50 cents.

There's bags of lollies.

Oh, how much is this chubba chups?

He's doing a big chubba chups for 30 cents.

That's pretty good for 2023 chubba chups.

Yeah.

Because remember like it used to be 50 cents for a mix

and then it was a dollar and then it was a dollar

and now it's $2 minimum for F all.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Second grade.

These ones actually look all right though.

I've got the address here for Arotatuna Food Mart.

It's just around the corner from my mate,

Mike's mum's place.

Oh, people will be so stoked about that.

Yeah.

About Mike's mum.

About Mike's mum's probably just pumping around

for a bag of lollies.

Right.

The Arotatuna Food Mart is at 412 Hookanui Road,

Arotatuna Hamilton.

Now I am Charmai Chairman.

It used to be bloody farmland when I was a kid.

Yeah.

That's progress for your vulnerable.

That's what happens.

Urban sprawl, mate.

Urban bloody sprawl.

Good news is that-

This is like a big dairy.

Oh, it's a food mart.

Yeah, it's a food mart.

I'm all for urban sprawl

if there are cheap lollies involved.

You'll go on record to say you're okay with fertile ground

being taken up with residential,

I'll say, at substandard housing.

We're going to have to start growing our salads in-

At vertical farms.

Vertical farms.

Vertical farms.

We've got a pro-urban sprawl over here.

If you're going down the new State Highway 1-

Yep.

That around Hamilton,

just you can get off at a price of there.

I mean, I don't know if it would save us money

given the price of gas to drive all the way down there

for cheap lollies,

but if you're passing through-

Yeah, give it a go.

I'll drive far for a cheap lol.

I'll tell you.

I love lollies.

What's your favourite?

I love a dairy that really commits to a lollie.

Fizzy Coke Bottles is my favourite.

Yeah, you love it.

Do you like the giant Fizzy Coke Bottles or are they-

No, no, no, no.

I like to pick at the smaller ones.

Okay, yeah, right.

After dinner when I'm in the mood for a sweet treat

because I've been a good boy.

Yeah.

Yeah, you have been a good boy.

Lollies never do it for me.

It's got to be a bit of trucking.

Yeah, it's got to be trucking.

No, it's got to be a bit of a trucking.

A bit of a pud.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Always a lolly.

I could go a lol right now.

Really?

No, I'm not.

I'm not.

But maybe if I'm in a car or a little lolly,

maybe in the movies, a little lolly.

Yeah, it's good stuff.

But no, I'm not.

Certainly not picking lollies over.

If there was cake, I'd go cake over lollies.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, no, cake is last.

Cake is last for me.

Lollies forever.

Sweet treat.

She's a lolly girl, right?

Yep.

If you're in Hamilton,

I wrote to turn a food mart.

Cheap lollies.

All right, Dan.

Right now, there is a sort of a trend or a theory, I guess,

doing the rounds on the social meds

of the fact that all of us are either wet or dry people.

Now, when I read this, I was like,

I'm a dry person.

We know this.

I'm ex-marie.

I've got very dry skin and the winter I dry out.

Got dry hair, dry everything.

I'm dry.

Yep.

Because I went on Roacotane.

And that is what saps you dry, doesn't it?

Wheelie was your oil.

So, pre-Roacotane, you were oily?

No, I've never been oily.

OK.

Never been oily.

Always dry.

I mean, the sprouts were dry.

OK, you're a dry people.

So, then I saw this.

Are you wet or dry?

I'm dry.

And then I read it.

I was like, no, I'm a wet girl.

Sorry, sorry.

It's the way I see it.

It's the way I see it.

It is the way you see it.

Yeah.

But the theory of the word...

Explain yourself.

The theory of whether or not you're a wet or dry person

is not about your skin.

It's about how you need to live life.

So, if you need to constantly have a full water bottle

that you're sipping on at all times,

like you're sort of microdosing a plant,

a house plant,

and when there's food,

you know, you've got to have a lot of ketchup.

You've got to keep the food wet.

And you...

Oh, yeah.

You know, yeah, I love a lot of condiments.

You know, I love my packet,

goop sources and a stir-fry.

It's got to be a goopy wet stir-fry.

If it's not wet enough, I'll add water.

You know what I mean?

If my stir-fry gets too dry, I'm adding water.

If it's frying, you'll just let, no, no, no, no, no.

I want you part-boiled, part-steamed.

Yeah.

Where's the goop?

What if we all be wet people then?

No, because some people don't.

Like, I used to live with a dry guy

and he would just get to the end of the day

and be like, God, I didn't drink any water today.

Yeah.

I was like with him.

I know a few people like that.

Yeah, a couple of dry guys.

Build, like, I would say tradies.

They're all dry guys.

No, but they'll have a sloppy mince and cheese pie

and a vee for breakfast.

Yeah, but where's the water?

Yeah, but I'd say pies.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Not a lot of liquid.

They don't put sauce on the pie.

Too busy.

They're dry guys.

OK.

Because I'll go out and I'll be like, man, you haven't peed

and you've got like no water around you.

And you work all day outside.

Yeah, my dad's a dry guy.

He will just forget to drink water

and then he'll say to my, God, I gotta hit that.

And she'll be like, have you drunk water?

And he's like, oh, no, no, no.

Dad will be it.

Make us up some cordial.

Yeah, my dad's a cordial.

My dad doesn't drink water.

He doesn't like it at all.

Really?

And we just pacemaker put it in there

like you've got to drink more water

and he was like, I don't.

I just got to say I don't like it.

So he's back on the cordials, is he?

He's back on the cordial.

Oh, bless.

Yeah, well, he's a dry guy.

I think my dad's a dry guy.

Like, I don't see him drinking heaps of water.

Yeah.

I remember when I used to work for my dad

and we'd get to like two o'clock in the afternoon.

I was like, do you want a glass of water?

He'd be like, oh, yeah.

He'd be like, no, it's by the way.

I never thought about it being a wet or a dry.

Yeah, but you know, like, I'm the same.

Like when there's a meal, if there's some kind of

like arancini balls, right?

I love arancini, but it's got to have a dip

and it's got to be moist in size.

Oh, yeah.

You know, it's got to have enough cheese in it

so that it's still wet.

Every food's better with the sauce.

Yeah, every food's better with the sauce.

I reckon a true test if you're a wet person,

if you know when you are out and you get a glass

of like a beer or a wine and then you look at it

and it's empty and you're like, how'd that happen?

I reckon that's a bit of a why.

Because you're a wet boy.

You just open the mouth and pour it in

and you just forget you've had it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because you're just craving wetness all the time.

Yeah, just wetness.

I think the three of us are wet boys.

I think we're all wet boys.

Yeah, well, you're a wet girl.

Yeah, I know.

Do you know what I mean?

I think I'm going to go with wet boys.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Fair enough.

Yeah, all right.

Let's just leave that there.

We're all weties.

Play ZDM's Fletch Vauna Naeli.

Play ZDM.

Oh, yeah, but it's small town news, isn't it?

Wow, a $10 million lotto win

in a town of four and a half thousand people.

Big news.

Big news.

Wairoa, Northern Hawks Bay.

Well, you know, I'll say it as well.

Been through the ring of the area.

Yeah, has.

This year, been through the ring.

Yeah, man.

So good to see a lotto win going to the area.

But we need...

Got no small numbers.

Got no small towns.

Whenever there was a lotto winner,

you'd all know the house.

Yeah.

Because my mum's from Dargaville,

and there was always one house.

I was like, they won lotto one year.

You're like, oh, yeah, that's a nice house.

Bold of them to stay in Dargaville.

Yeah.

Still work.

Hey, what?

Nothing wrong with Dargaville.

Still got a car on blocks in the front yard.

Weird.

We're in projects.

Just call space.

Just call space.

You don't allow projects.

Yeah, exactly.

So we want you to break the small...

The big news in your small town.

Uh-huh.

We love this segment.

Let's get it.

It's been a while.

We're also going to need you to sign off at the end.

Oh, yeah.

This is Jessica for...

I'm just as an example,

because we've got Jessica joining us now.

Just a small town for time.

A small town for time.

Big news.

Yeah, OK.

Good morning, Jessica.

Hi.

Now, I've got some breaking news

and introduction for you.

This is breaking news.

Yeah, we've got breaking news.

We're going to Jessica on the scene now.

Jessica, where are you reporting from?

Cambridge in the Waikato.

Oh, beautiful.

Stunning.

Great trees.

Beautiful, beautiful.

Great trees.

For a given spring,

you begin your blossoms.

Great trees.

Great trees.

The trees are 10 out of 10.

They still got that speed camera

right at the start.

Oh, yeah.

Out by the old Pratama village.

Yeah.

I donate to that every year.

No, I probably do too,

without knowing.

Yeah.

What's the small town big news?

Cambridge opened their first chemist.

We have, last week.

Oh, you've got to go get Dan Carter's perfume.

Yeah, I love the chemist.

You always wander in there for a thing of vitamin C.

You come out with $100 over this year.

10 tubs of lube in a new condition.

Great happy prices.

Great happy prices.

Yeah.

OK, well, fantastic news.

Could you sign off, Jessica?

This is Jessica from Cambridge.

Yeah, thank you, Jessica.

Thank you, Jessica.

Back to the studio.

This is breaking news.

I believe we've got breaking news.

Corinne's on the phone.

Where are you calling from, Corinne?

Calling from Lawrenceville.

Oh, hello!

Born's Hometown.

Born's Hometown.

What's the big news there?

So, David's Street School

have their during your production on

for the next three days.

So, it's like the five, six, seven-year-olds

and they're doing Back to the Future.

Oh, fantastic.

Five, six, seven-year-olds were born

30 whatever years

after the original Back to the Future came out

and it's a complicated timeline,

time travel structure.

Do they have any idea

what exactly's going on

in the intricacies

of Marty McFly's relationship

with his mother?

Yeah.

Not really,

but my daughter's definitely loving

the 80s music, she says.

Right.

Who's your daughter in the production?

Oh, she's just a...

Chorus line, you know?

Yeah, that's all right.

I was just a chorus line in a tree.

And look at you now.

And look at me now, flourishing.

Yeah.

Like the trees in Cambridge.

Thank you very much.

Do you want to sign off, Corinne?

Yep, sign it off from Lawrenceville.

Yeah, thank you, Corinne.

Thank you, Corinne.

This is Breaking News.

Breaking News.

Oliver's on the phone.

Where are you calling from, Oliver?

I'm calling from Fodafoda.

Fodafoda.

Oh, OK.

Between Hamilton and Raglan?

Yes.

Yep, just there.

What's the big news there, Oliver?

Oh, we just got a new town hall.

What?

A new town hall.

I thought we only built town halls

after World War II.

Yeah.

How did this not make the 1 o'clock news?

The 1pm...

Press conference.

Yeah.

That's beautiful.

Whereabouts in Fodafoda, is it?

It's just behind the Village Café.

Right.

And what's it got?

Just a big venue.

Oh, yeah.

It's just a massive venue, pretty much.

You'll be having your 21st there one day, Oliver.

One?

You'll be having your 21st there one day.

Oh, one day, one day.

One day.

Good boy.

There we go, there we go.

Oliver, could you sign off, Oliver?

Can you sign off, please?

Oh, this is Oliver's from Fodafoda.

Thank you, Oliver.

Killed it.

Go through some text messages here.

This is breaking news.

Napier scandal.

Local bar has cancelled a knitting group's booking.

And the knitting group, the knitters are livid.

Are they?

Yeah.

They're pretty good at spending their money.

I wouldn't imagine so many tatoes.

Sit on a lemonade the whole time.

Oh, the entire time.

Huge news here from Porongia.

Mate, we're getting a lot of action

from the Waikato today.

Yeah, well, it's a big lot of news.

Porongia is having its monthly

and its annual market on the same weekend.

Now, this is causing...

Are they combining?

No.

That is two separate organisations.

Oh, dear.

This sounds like it could be problematic.

Yeah.

Some other messages.

Little Mangafai just opened their new

Broadway over the water.

If you're up north of Auckland there.

Okay.

So, more Waikato news.

It's all happening in my beautiful home province.

Potaruru just got a coffee cart for the first time.

Great news.

Well, now we just need a decent supermarket.

Shots fired.

At the supermarket.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I'm not reading your silly joke out from Pada Padaumu.

I saw I read the whole text

before I'm going to read it out in here.

Or I won't say it.

What were they saying?

I won't say it.

Oh, okay.

It was silly.

It was...

It was detrimental.

What about this beautiful news from Te Poi Waikato,

the first man-on-man gay couple, as described by them.

Man-on-man gay couple have bought a lifestyle block.

That's big.

That is big.

That's big news.

That's big news.

That's big news.

That's big news.

That's big.

That's big.

Te Poi Waikato.

The local team.

And thank you for clarifying that it's man-on-man.

I reckon the Leesmen's would have been in there years ago.

Oh, Leesmen's.

Oh, years ago.

Leesmen's actual city of Te Poi.

It's Māori for Leesmen's.

Is that okay?

Yeah.

They've got a round pool table at the pub there.

Do they?

Wow.

What?

Wow, dude.

Wow.

We used to stop every time we were on the way to the mountain

for a day trip for a game of round pool.

It's like playing mini golf, but on a pool table.

Yeah.

Yeah, that is for off my game.

Yeah.

And Featherston Community Patrol are fundraising for a new car,

so there's going to be a garden ramble.

They love a garden ramble.

And Featherston...

Ramble.

Bunch of locals are getting people to check out their gardens.

So if you want to get involved in that,

tickets are $25 each for a ramble.

See, that sounds more like community news than breaking news.

That's, yeah, you're right actually there.

That's small town, small news.

It is.

All right, we've got to bring this back.

I love it.

I've missed this segment I really have.

Next on the show, how did you get your nickname?

Oh my god, the story behind this is so bad.

Guys, okay.

There is a reddit thread that was sharing the bizarre ways

that you got your nickname, right?

Like some of them, one of them, someone they worked with a guy

they called the Sniper's Nightmare.

And everyone was like, how did he get the name Sniper's Nightmare?

And it's because he had one leg shorter than the other,

which made his head bobble to the side.

So his head kind of went like that when he walked.

If tradies put as much evidence of finishing their job

that they were working on as they do,

ragged on their mates, productivity best through the roof.

Yeah.

Oh my god, that's so funny.

You'd take a shot and you'd...

Yeah.

Oh my god.

Whip, whip, whip.

Running is exact.

That's so good.

Sniper's Nightmare is really great.

There's another guy whose name legitimately was Wayne Bruce.

So they called him Manbat.

Like Manbat was his go-to.

Oh my god.

Oh yeah, brilliant.

That's so good.

And then, right, this is the one that caught my attention.

There was a guy who all of his mates knew him as sample.

Like now he's just sample, right?

Everyone's like, how did he get that?

Is he a DJ?

Is he a DJ?

No, he's no.

He's not a DJ.

So this guy went into the doctors and they asked him for a sample

and they gave him a little urine jar.

Yep.

And they're like, you know, we need to take a sample.

So you go in and he went into the bathroom

and he came back and he handed it to them

and he had ejaculated in the jar.

He thought they wanted a sperm sample,

not a urine sample.

Oh no.

So when they handed over the nurse,

it was like, no, a urine sample.

And he'd literally been in the bathroom

like getting a sample out.

So then he tells all his friends

and they're like, oh my god, it's sample now.

I love this.

I love this.

I know.

So I wondered if we could take some calls

and get some text in of your nickname

or a nickname of a friend and how they got it.

Yes.

So we've already had a text now.

This needs explanation.

I went to a wedding in Nazia a few years back.

The groomsmen were called Fraggle, Fish and Moisty.

Now, those are great nicknames,

but we need to know why we want it.

Why is he called Fraggle?

Yeah.

Why is he called Moisty?

Why is he called Fish?

Wait, they didn't say why?

No, they just said those were their nicknames.

So we need to know.

No, I want to know how you got it

because it's usually something absolutely terrible.

How did you get your nickname?

I'll 800 dahls at him.

Let's take some calls.

Text her as well.

9, 6, 9, 6.

Already some great messages coming through.

Yeah, maybe you could tell us your nickname

and we'll try to guess how you got it.

Sample.

Yes.

I mean, obviously, stories have to be OK if you're on air.

Yeah, no.

OK, so on air, please.

The lads, lads, lads are coming in thick and fine.

I bet they are.

I bet they are.

Some of them are not fit for Brawlcourt.

We're wanting to know what your nickname is

and more importantly, how you got it

because there is a guy who goes by the name Sample

because when he was asked to give a urine sample,

he accidentally gave a semen sample.

Very different sample.

Yeah, that's why when you go to lab tests,

they really explain it to you.

Wait, you're quite dumb.

What about the time that I got asked to do a stall sample

but they didn't tell me it had to be split up in three

so then I had to go into the bathroom

with my one stall sample and split it into thirds?

Now, that was a dark day.

That was a dark day for you.

Brawlcourt joins us or Yam joins us.

Good morning, Yam.

Hello.

And a Yam.

OK, how did Yam get to Nickname?

Nickname.

Oh, she's wrinkly.

Oh, Yam.

Oh, close.

Oh, close.

So, how did you get it?

When I was a baby, my auntie looked at my toes

and apparently they were the wrinkliest toes she's ever seen

so the Nickname Yam toes came out.

Cos babies do look a bit Yammy-a.

They are a Yam.

Yeah, they are.

They haven't filled out.

And then I'm 28 now and Yam is still stuck.

Like, my mum calls me Yam family.

Just cos you had wrinkly toes.

When I was a baby, yeah.

Oh, but you don't have wrinkly toes now.

I don't think so.

Yeah, OK.

You've filled out.

You've filled them out.

Filled them out.

With adultness.

Ah, Brawlc, Yam, thank you.

Thanks, Yam.

It's the messages in.

My Nickname was Pom Pom or Mushroom

because my mum gave me a haircut

and it left me with a bob

that puffed up like I'm into a mushroom shape.

So, yeah, people would call me Pom Pom or Mushroom.

I didn't even stuck after the haircut.

This is the thing about a Nickname.

A good Nickname sticks even after you've solved the issue.

And if you don't like it, if you don't like it,

you don't react at the time.

That's another way to get out of it, Nickname.

Yeah.

We had a mate who always had grey hair

since we were kids.

Like, at intermediate, he had grey hair.

Wow.

So, he got called Lammington

cos it looked like he'd been dipped in coconut.

Aw.

We're talking about your Nicknames

and how you got them.

Every good Nickname has a good origin story.

Some of these are so inappropriate

and we'll never see the light of day.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Mario joins us. Good morning, Mario.

How you going?

Good. What's your Nickname?

Well, that's just my Nickname.

I've got a real name,

but everyone knows me by Mario.

Mario.

Because of the Nintendo game.

Well, I guess, sort of,

cos when I was playing rugby back in the day,

every time I'd go to a breakdown

on a scrum or wherever I'd go down,

if I was on the ground,

as I got up, my arse crack would be hanging out.

And so one of my good mates said,

well, that's Mario the plumber,

and so then I became Mario a butt crack

was my name Mario a butt crack,

but now I'm just Mario.

He's got your name to Mario.

Oh, my God.

I prefer Mario to Mario a butt crack to be fair.

Yeah, right, yeah.

And do you still now in your adult life

get the butt crack out?

Oh, absolutely.

It's just part of life.

Yeah, that's all right.

What caused it a short shoot

or a nice shapely bottom?

Well, just like,

I guess a big stomach and the pants

wouldn't go over this.

Yeah, boy.

Everything was everything with the shape in.

So, yeah, it's there.

But anyway, I was pretty happy

with that sort of a nickname.

So yeah, okay.

Mario, amazing.

Thank you.

Some messages in.

My nickname was noodles

because I had a perm and used most

to scrunch up my curls.

So it was dry

and it felt like uncooked,

terminate noodles.

So people call me noodles.

Like Justin Timberlake.

Yeah, yeah.

Has would have been crunchy to touch.

There's ramen here.

It looked bouncy,

but it never moved.

My son's nickname is Mitch

after the Michelin man

because his body had lots

of chubby wrinkles.

We still call him Mitch.

My nickname at school

in South Africa was chicken

because my Christian name was

in Afrikaans, was Hendrick,

which literally translates

to the act of a chicken

pushing out an egg.

Oh, my God.

My friend, my bestie,

still calls me Queenie.

One of her third formers,

I was just walking up,

paying attention,

and I strutted right through

the middle of a cricket game

at lunchtime without even noticing,

and the game came to an abrupt halt

while I made my way

through the field

and I looked like the Queen.

Amazing.

That's what the game for.

A Spaglio.

Go on.

Yes, no.

I was just reading it.

Spaglio won.

It really made me laugh.

Spaglio Italian for mistake.

I'm the youngest of six kids.

Still get called Spaglio to the day.

There's always a bonus.

Yeah, lots of really inappropriate ones.

Yeah, I love.

Thank you for the ones

that Texan's saying,

hey, not for broadcast,

just for you.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Thank you.

Those are some good ones.

Appreciate that.

Man, so many.

A couple.

Some horrendous nicknames

that I feel sorry for people

living without there.

Yeah.

Adds Taylor Swift.

Wildest Dreams.

Taylor's version.

Taylor's version.

That's the song

that you've got to remember

along with the song

at midday

and then the song at four

if you want to win those tickets

to see it live in Sydney.

You've got to be the first

caller through when that four

o'clock song plays as well.

Now, yesterday on a little bit

of pod, our secondary podcast,

it was discussed that Fletch had

had a moment in nature.

Please recount for us now

the story told.

Oh, come on.

It's too good not to share.

I know, but it was different

on the podcast

because that's, you know,

it's not nationwide radio.

We're a bit loose.

I don't know, man.

More people listen to the podcast

and listen to the show.

I'm just going to say.

We get a bit loose

on the podcast.

Looser than Uranus in the bush.

It felt a bit more intimate.

I don't know.

So at the weekend,

some friends of mine,

we went up and did the pinnacles

in the Coromandel.

So a little day at day high.

And Thames, just out of Thames.

Beautiful spot.

Weather wasn't too great,

but I'm notoriously a fast walker.

So I...

So fast.

I am a fast walker

and I run to keep up with you.

Yeah.

And I've given up keeping up

with either of them.

Born to be around the block.

We've been hiking together

and I never...

I never...

Oh, no.

Sometimes I've gone ahead.

But you're pretty fast as well.

So this is what I can't believe

is that you would go,

you would organise a social hike

and then your friends would walk

so slow that you just ditch them

and went ahead.

No, but there was four of them.

And so there was enough.

He did the same thing

when he did the Wanganui River.

He was in a julek hike

with my mate, Callum,

who famously loves a chat.

And Fletcher's like,

paddle, paddle, paddle.

And Callum's like not paddling actively.

Oh, my God.

Slow the pine down

so we can talk to him.

But Fletcher's just like,

ah!

We're carrying him down the bloody Wanganui River.

What are you doing?

We've got to get to the hut.

For what?

Chill out, dude.

So I know,

like on the way up,

I got to the hut maybe like 40 minutes

before my friends.

And that was fine, just chill.

And then we went up to the summit

and then we were coming...

40 minutes.

I'm training.

You need to calm down.

For what?

For what?

So and we've got to the summit

and we had a nice little time

chilling out there

and then I was like,

I'm coming down.

I'll see you guys at the hut.

They're slow,

faffin about.

And there's a couple of ladders

on the pinnacles

because it's actually quite steep

in some parts.

So they've got these...

So it's a red wall.

Yeah, got these metal ladders

that are like screwed into the cliff.

So you're coming down

and it was the second ladder.

I came down and I was like all alone.

I ditched my friends.

It was like foggy

and there was cloud all around.

It was quite nice.

It was very calm.

And I got off the last ladder

and just as I stepped down,

I let out a giant fart.

Oh, yeah.

Like...

What are we talking?

Are we a wet slapper

or just a classic like...

Like a comedy sounding...

Yeah, great.

I think you've been walking

so there's a bit of

yeah,

smooth back of the air.

And it was a very like full

sounding and kind of,

you know, in the...

Robust.

In the surrounding valley.

It kind of echoed a tiny bit.

And I was like,

well, that's fine.

And by myself,

my friends are like way out the top still.

I take one step

and turn around

and there's this lady

right next to me.

And I didn't see her.

She came from nowhere.

Just magically appeared.

And I was just like,

oh my God,

in my head,

I've just lit up the biggest,

most embarrassing fart.

And I was just like,

hi.

And because I had my hood over,

it was raining.

So I had my jacket

and my hood over.

I was like,

she's not going to know who I am.

That's fine.

I'm never going to see this woman again.

Ai, you don't tend to remember

people who fart right in your face.

Yeah.

Not like you'd be like,

especially when they work

in the media.

So embarrassing.

It's always just like...

And because you don't wear sunglasses.

No, no.

So you just would have

been this little...

No, but there was very little

of my face to say.

I was like,

I've got away with this.

It's fine.

She's not going to know

who farted right in front of her

until I get later that day a message

on the way back.

We're driving back to Auckland

from the Coromandel.

And I get a message from a woman

called Briar

who's replying to my story

of me at the top of the pinnacles.

It reads,

Thanks for the really loud fart

on your way down the ladder

when you thought no one was there.

Oh, my God.

So she knew.

She knew.

She worked it out.

She knew.

So she put two and two together.

Yeah.

And then I was like,

oh, my God, I'm so sorry.

And I thought,

yeah, I wondered if you'd recognise me

and I'm so sorry about that.

And she said my friends

were talking about me.

And that's how she...

Oh, so your friends that you left behind

Yeah.

were talking about how you'd rushed ahead.

Yep.

She puts two and two together

and now she can say

it was you

which from the radio

Yes.

Very embarrassing.

And it was loud.

It was loud too.

How could it be more embarrassing?

Well, can't.

Can I?

You've just talked about

on National Radio.

Line three, Briar joins us.

Good morning, Briar.

Good morning, Briar.

Tell us about this fart.

Oh, I was, you know,

it's lovely rainy day.

And I knew he hadn't noticed me

and I didn't want to go in the flight.

That was my worst fart.

Well, because I was coming down the ladder.

I didn't see anyone.

Oh, I knew he didn't notice me

and then he just met one.

Right.

And I was like,

I can't remember.

I was just saying hello

and he was coming.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry, Briar.

I'm so sorry.

I didn't see you there.

I would have held it in

if I'd seen someone.

Oh, I was playing in his spot.

Slip.

I was like, no.

That was a fart.

Yeah.

The way that you fart

when you think you're in private

is so different to the way you fart

if you let one slip in public.

Oh, it was loud.

Like I think the whole valley heard it.

Yeah.

How do you go?

Yeah, dude.

This is so embarrassing right now.

Oh, no.

There you go.

Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry, Briar.

I thought I'd go to way with it too.

I was like, I'm never going to see this woman again.

I kind of like the voice.

Like I recognise the voice of it

and I was like, no, no idea who that is.

And now we're talking about

a old fletch around her head to the hut

and I'm like fletched.

And I'm like, hang on.

That's the fata.

That's the fata.

I mean, I'm masked.

Yeah.

How many people, Briar,

have you told that you saw fletch

from radio in the bush

and you did a whopping fart

right in front of you?

I did when I got back into research.

I did a bit of a snapchat story out.

Did you?

I mentioned a radio...

No, don't you dare.

You've been e-vast.

No, you can't do that.

There's no way there's an unknown radio

host four times over the drink driving limit

and poor Hailey gets accused

because she's got an alcohol problem.

It's not me.

It wasn't her.

I don't drive.

Oh, no.

Yeah.

And obviously it was me

because all over my story

it was me hiking at the pinnacle.

Hiking at the pinnacle.

I was like, gosh.

I'm glad that you've joined us

this morning, Briar,

because I do apologise.

I would have not done it

if I'd seen you.

Oh, that's OK.

OK, fan.

Is it lovely?

It's a lovely hike, though, wasn't it?

Oh, it was done.

The views are amazing.

Lovely.

If only someone didn't spoil it

by farting right in your face.

After that long walk,

you were just about at the summit.

OK, yeah.

Yeah.

I'm apologies.

Apologies.

OK.

Thanks for joining us, Briar.

No, you're welcome.

You're welcome to be on the show.

Yeah.

Thank you, Briar.

This is one of my favourite threads

on Reddit,

which is like,

Am I the arsehole, basically?

Oh, yes.

So good, eh?

They go on and they say,

Hey, this happened.

Like, am I in the wrong here?

Or are you with me?

So the story that they shared

is a man

and him and his wife

were going to visit their daughter

who had just started university.

OK.

And so this is an American

they were flying,

you know, long flights,

all this kind of stuff.

And they got to the airport

and it was really, really busy.

Checked in,

got through security,

got to the gate

with 15 minutes to spare

before their flight

was going to commence boarding, right?

OK, so then they were nice and early.

Yeah.

Nice and early enough.

50 minutes is not enough for me.

But they're there.

Then his wife says,

Oh, God, now we're here.

I just quickly want to get a coffee.

And he was like,

Well, that's OK.

There's a little cart,

you know,

like a small little store

that does hot food and coffee.

Grab one there.

I'll go,

I'll get one for you.

And she's like,

No, I want Starbucks.

And then he was like,

But Starbucks is a,

is a train,

like a rail ride away.

It's one of those big airports.

OK, so it's got a little air shuttle.

Yeah, like an internal

shuttle thing.

And she's like,

Now we've got plenty of time.

15 minutes till it starts boarding.

There's all these people on this flight.

I'll make it back.

Oh, no, she's,

this has given me a big anxiety.

I'm already upset.

And so then she just totals off without him.

And he's like,

Oh my God.

OK, fine.

15 minutes goes by.

Nowhere to be seen.

The plane starts boarding.

So he starts ringing his wife

being like,

Hey, hey, hey, hey,

where are you?

Where are you three times?

No answer.

Finally, she answers.

She's like,

Yeah, I'm nearly there.

I'm nearly there.

But the line is like tapering off.

And it's coming time

that he's going to need to board

or they're going to lock him off the flight.

So he gets on the flight.

And she misses it.

She missed the flight.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

But the question is,

everyone's like,

Oh my God,

you should have waited.

And he's like,

No, but I said to her,

you don't have enough time for this coffee.

You don't.

You just get one from that place there.

And then,

you know,

they were going to miss his flight

to see the daughter.

So we just got on it.

Could he have not have said to the gate staff

like she's just round the corner?

Yeah, but they don't care.

I'm sure he did.

I mean, they don't give a crap.

I've got rules.

They have to,

that has to be shut at a certain time.

Yeah.

Okay.

So look at that.

I'm big apart.

It says there in rates the pivotal moment

when a flight attendant was announcing

the gate is closing.

He said he pleaded with her.

Can you just wait a couple of minutes?

My wife's there.

They said,

We've got to go.

So he's like,

I got on.

So would you rather stay

and then you've got to buy two flights

for you and your wife

or you get on

and then you've just got to buy one flight?

No, I wouldn't buy this.

I'd be so annoyed at my partner though.

She just misses the weekend away with the

Would you do this to you?

I would.

I would.

I'm the type of person that if there's a

mat, if you get to the gate

and there's a massive line,

I'm going to be like,

I'm just going to go get a coffee from over here.

But I full well know the risk of doing that.

Yeah.

And I'm not going to ask anybody to feel sorry for me

if I miss it.

Yeah.

You know, so that's just,

that's just how we roll, baby.

That's how us loose units roll.

We have to be expected to be left behind.

Oh, whereas I'm with Hailey,

I'm like, you've got to be really early.

Yeah.

I can't stand it otherwise.

I cannot stand it.

But I'm sort of on board with him.

Like he's in the article.

He goes, it's like a three page.

He's having a big rant.

He goes on to be like,

she's always dilly dallying.

She's always been delayed.

She's a nice buggeroo.

She's a Vaughan.

Yeah.

But I'm okay with it.

Like I wouldn't expect Shade to wait for me,

but she won't get on the plane without me.

And I'm just like, get on.

She's like, no, not till you get here or whatever.

And I'll just be like, just do it.

Do it.

I know, but it's a night there.

Yeah.

Would you get on the plane without Aaron?

If he was dilly dallying and getting a coffee?

I would.

I don't have a dilly dallyer though.

Because I don't know.

I mean, I say in my, I'm like,

yeah, man, stuff him.

I'd probably weigh.

I'd feel weird.

And then I'd be so annoyed and so grumpy.

And I'd make him pay for it.

If that was the flight,

you'd totally have a right to be grumpy.

But if they get on, that's fine.

That's me.

Oh, no.

If they're like, Mr, we're waiting on passenger Smith.

I'll be like, oh, hey, that's me.

And they're like, yeah, cheeky boy.

And I'll be like, ha, ha, he, he, he.

You just work your charm.

Yeah.

What about this message from a friend in the group chat?

Their partner will leave them for an upgrade.

So they've got a thousand grades.

Yeah, yeah.

And they, they, they came back on a recent trip in business

and left them in economy

because they had like a free airline upgrade.

When me and Aaron fly together,

we'll always, we'll always prepay for exit row seats

because he's so tall.

And I'm like, well, I'll be, oh, you know,

so I can sit next to you.

And he's always like, oh, we could save the money.

And you could go, you know, cram into just normal seats.

Yep.

It's a good call.

It's a good call, actually.

You know, you don't need to leave.

You'll ditch me for a little bit of legroom.

Yeah, I don't need it like he does.

I like it.

If I get upgraded to business,

it's my personal reward for getting up at four o'clock in the morning.

That's a man that did get upgraded once

and his wife was not.

I like to look at this as my personal reward.

Wow.

Yeah.

The holiday is something we've worked towards together,

but this will be my personal reward.

That was out of your control.

They just did it.

Yeah, you know, you're on my side.

I'm on your side.

Please, please, please.

I'm with you, babe.

Please, babe.

You are, daddy works hard.

Oh, business is nice too.

I could keep in touch with the plebs down there.

Couldn't I?

I could message them.

There was a seat message thing.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Play Zodians, Fletch, Vaughan and Haley.

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's honey badger fact of the day,

day two of honey badger week.

This is a pretty great fact.

Honey badgers are part of the weasel family.

So they are related to otters, ferrets, badgers and skunks.

Oh, I don't like ferrets.

Oh, you never care.

No, I'm not a huge fan of ferrets.

No, yuck.

They've been having a good chat about ferrets lately

because about pests, stones, weasels, ferrets, yuck, etc.

Get rid of all of them.

Get rid of all of them out of this beautiful country of ours.

But they are of that same family.

And much like skunks can produce a smelly odour.

Honey badgers.

Yeah, honey badgers.

From the butt.

From the butt.

So a skunk sprays, they spray organic sulphur liquid.

But a honey badger doesn't.

It's sulphur, is it?

It's a sulphury.

Easily end up smelling like ototorua.

Yeah, like rotten eggs and spoiled food and stuff.

Yuck.

It's called a, yeah, it's a,

the skunk sprays made of organic sulphur containing files.

And so, but, but honey badgers don't spray it.

They don't squirt it.

Okay.

They literally dump a stink bomb.

They turn when you went to the shop and got a stink bomb.

And set it off.

They turn their, they've got glands just above their bum under their tail

and it literally turns itself inside out and goes boom.

And like a prolapses.

Yeah, it pops out.

It pops out like a yogurt container.

And it just, it's called a stink bomb, not a spray.

They don't spray it.

They don't propel it.

They literally just go, it's just out.

And it just goes, now if you've ever been to the vet

because your dog's had a blocked anal gland.

No thing.

Or a vet who does one.

You'll know that that smell is ungodly.

Yeah, sounds like a reason not to get a dog.

Horrible, horrible, horrible.

But it works in the same way.

Except they can voluntarily choose to dump theirs.

Now you might be thinking, Vaughn, what do they do it for?

Because I know skunks do it when they're being hunted or predators after them.

Yeah.

Or they're scared.

But yesterday you told us that honey badgers

are the most fearless creature in the world.

Yeah.

Yeah, you did.

Well, they do it for a multitude of reasons.

They do it to mark their territory to almost sort of like aggressively

taunt people that are hunting them.

Like if a lion's hunting them, apparently it's not an affair.

It's just like, yeah, come get it.

Like that.

And they also believe it may because the honey badger eats honey.

Loves honey so much that's where it got its name from.

Honey eater of the cape.

The cape being the South African cape.

They believe it may have a sleeping effect on bees.

The sting claw.

Oh my god.

They make the bees knock some out.

You know how you smoke out a bee, honey?

It chills them all out and they relax.

So the honey beaver can get in there and eat all the honey badger.

The honey badger, sorry.

Please don't move the doors of the honey beaver.

So the honey badger can get in there and eat all the honey.

Yeah.

And the bees are just like, boo.

Yeah.

Honey man, tick my honey man.

Mark the territory.

Impress fellow honey badgers because apparently the smellier the better.

So a honey badger comes in and they're like, whoa, whoa.

We got a big dog in the house.

Right.

OK.

And you know, impress predators who are hunting them to be like, oh,

here you come and get some.

And it has a sleepy effect on bees.

It calms them down.

So they're less likely to attack them whilst they are raiding there.

Are you worried that you're going to run out of honey badger effects?

I've had so many honey badger effects.

OK, good.

Because it is a honey badger week.

I don't want to stand right at it.

So it's a honey badger week.

So it's to know about my ever, you know,

they're up there now with the Tasmanian devil for me.

Are they?

They're favourite animals.

OK.

OK.

It's wild.

I love it.

An absolute little, little character.

A little monster, a little terror, a little chaotic unit.

So today's fact of the day is the honey badger.

Like it's cousin the skunk,

can produce a very, very smelly liquid.

It's time now for the impossible phone and topic.

A phone and topic we think will be near impossible.

Or quite hard to get calls for.

Now there is a man in Manhattan.

His name is Daniel Levine.

He woke up Maroon 5.

Not Maroon 5, no.

He has recently woken up to, you know,

in the morning checked his bank.

Now, you know, you do that.

Sit on the toilet.

Sit on the toilet.

You check your apps.

So much money you got.

Social media, you open the banking app.

And that's when he realized

that he had in his bank account

a deposit of $89,912 dollars.

Oh, wow.

Now, don't go spending that

because the bank's going to want that back.

Well, yes.

So this had actually been transferred

by an e-trade corporation.

So some kind of financial corporation

had accidentally put it in his account.

18 million million.

And he, unlike most people,

wasn't like, free money,

I'm going to go start spending this.

He obviously got in touch with them.

Oh, they'll always get it back.

Yeah, 100%.

Always get it back.

Yeah, but wouldn't you just go and buy

like our nice dress?

Do you know what I mean?

And just for your troubles?

I would expect some sort of trouble money.

Yeah.

Pop into moochie, get a glass of champagne.

Yeah.

He put me out.

I'm going to need a percentage.

Could you, how much interest could you make

even if you didn't tell them for like a week?

I could just put it in a high interest on.

Is that even a thing?

Can you do that?

Well, no, you could just have it as a savings account.

I mean, you wouldn't have time to turn and deposit it

because they'd want it out.

But even if you just had it in a savings account

with a smaller amount of interest for a week,

it would be good stuff.

But a lot of savings,

because have you ever seen those savings terms

and conditions?

It's like $1,000 to, I don't know,

$1 million or something or what.

But it would never give you interest on $89 million.

No.

This also happened to a guy in Australia recently.

He had $68,000,

which was a mistake in the numbering,

the bank account numbers.

Someone had meant to deposit $68,000

into someone else's account.

He got it.

OK.

And this is—

But then if it's happened,

I think our impossible phone has got to be

when a bank error happened in your favour.

No give-backs.

No give-backs?

No give-backs.

When it was a mistake in your favour, no give-backs.

It's impossible, right?

But this could also include when ATMs go

about haywire and they chuck out a bit of cash,

and they can generally—

because if it was your card was the last one in there

and it says you took $400 but $5,000 spat out,

they might be like,

hey, did you get it?

We've got you on camera getting it.

But maybe before that.

Yeah, maybe.

Before they had their technology.

Maybe.

Because I think it's too probable that there's been—

I think it's always going to give-back, so.

But this is worse.

What makes it the impossible phone?

Oh, my God.

We've got to try a little bit harder

to find one with no give-backs.

So have you had a bank error in your favour

but you kept the money?

But they didn't pick up more.

So it could even be—

You could call anonymously.

It could even be like $100

from a wrong trade-me account or something.

Yeah, it did.

And you kept it.

And they didn't—

Oh, yeah, okay.

They didn't come looking.

Okay.

The person that paid the $100 just paid another $100

this time into the right account

so they considered it was their error.

Someone would write off that

before they wrote off like $89 million.

Yeah, totally.

I would be quicker to write off $100 and $89 million personally.

I'm no mathematician, but I don't believe—

That stacks.

Okay, well, the impossible phone-in topic.

Give us a call.

I'll 800 dahls at Amazon number.

You can text through 96696.

When has there been a bank error in your favour

that didn't have to be paid back?

Yeah, you kept it.

Yeah, you got it.

The impossible phone-in topic.

Have you had a bank error in your favour

but you kept it?

You didn't have to give it back.

A man was accidentally deposited $89 million.

Yeah, ridiculous.

He obviously sorted that out

and had to give that back

because nobody's missing $89 million.

He's proved because he's a little B

and he wasn't brave enough to just take it, run.

You would have gone on a small shopping spree.

I would have shaved off my hair.

I would have got a whole bunch of tattoos.

I would have left.

Yeah.

Well, a lot of people messaging in.

They've been on the wrong end

of an unreversible bank mistake.

Oh, okay.

For example, the person who went camping

and their friend paid for all the camping fees.

Yep.

They said they'd pay them back

and they did.

They made a bank transfer

but they put in a silly particulars, didn't they?

We all put in silly particulars

all the time.

Princess Des was very embarrassing,

very silly, very adult.

And then they accidentally got one number wrong

and deposited into somebody else's bank account.

Then they were too embarrassed to ring the bank

and say, I made a mistake.

Can you get that money back?

Because the bank would have to look at the particulars.

So I've got them twice.

That's pretty good.

Leanne, you've got a bank here in your favour.

You've got to keep it.

Yes, I did.

It was about 30 years ago.

I was an assistant manager in a clothing store.

Yep.

And I had got another job as a manager

in another store.

So I handed in my notice and left that.

And then for a month after I'd finished

and been paid out all holiday pay and stuff,

I got paid for an extra month every week.

Oh!

And you didn't tell them?

No.

Or they rang me about it and I just said, oh, OK.

And but there was nothing legally they could do.

So they were a bit of an ass off the company to work for.

So I...

So you just took that as their ass off the bank.

Yes.

So but that was...

I like this.

That's an era in your favour.

I love it.

Thank you, Leanne.

Keep your techs coming in.

9-6-9-6.

Yes, someone transferred $500 into my account

and I left the money sitting there waiting

because I was told that they'd always come for it back.

Yeah.

After two years...

I took it at my spending.

Now, see, after two weeks, I would have spent it.

Yes.

Oh, two minutes.

Keep your techs coming in.

The impossible fine-in topic.

A man had $89 million deposited into his account.

Accidentally, he...

Had to give it back.

He gave it back.

We want to know when you've had a bank here in your favour

and you didn't give it back.

You didn't have to.

Yeah.

Andrew says, I had 25,000 rand deposited into my bank account

when I was in South Africa and I contacted the bank

about it and said, I don't know where this has come from.

They said, no, no, it's meant to be there.

And he said, oh, I don't know about that.

And they were like, no, no, it's correct.

How much is producer Jared?

How much is 25,000 rand?

No, I can't hear you.

How about now?

I think he said grand.

I think that's about two and a half rand.

For free in his bank.

And he didn't give it back.

Yes, that's nice.

For free in your bank.

Oh, that's a good bank here in your favour.

Still have to account that to the IRD, though.

Do you?

Do you?

Do you?

No, only if it's been put into your business account.

No, only if it's not in your business, your personal account.

No, he said it was his business account.

Oh, only if they ask.

Oh, they're not looking in there yet.

Only if they ask.

I'm not sure they have it.

No, that's how tax works.

Now, I don't know that.

No, Hailey told me that's how tax works.

Only if they ask.

Yeah, you pay if they ask for it.

Right, they have to ask for it.

Well, they don't often ask.

Yeah.

Right.

Please don't come fishing.

Yeah, they will.

How's this?

This person hasn't messaged us the last part of this message.

The producers have tried to call.

In 1998, Westpac accidentally deposited $9.999 billion into my account.

This isn't the...

No, that was $10 million.

Someone messaged in as well saying,

don't call me because I don't want to talk.

But my friend was the one that had $10 million deposited in their Westpac account.

They did a runner and they ended up getting caught after an international manhunt.

I was 21 years old at the time

and I had no idea what was going on.

I biked down to the ATM because back in the day,

you had phone banking.

That's how I found out.

I had $9 billion in my account.

I mean to think you were got the...

That is like you have $9 billion.

So I needed to see it written down.

So I went down to the ATM,

got three printouts from the ATM showing the balance.

I still have all of these showing $9.9 billion.

What a story.

Using the ATM, I transferred $80,000 to my savings account

just to see if I could.

It worked.

Oh my God.

I'll teach you the rest of the story soon.

I'm just dropping the kids off at school.

No!

Screw the kids.

We need to know what happened.

I also need them to email or...

A picture of the...

A picture of the ATM receipt was $9 billion.

He's won an excellent incredible story that is.

You just look at it all day.

You just be looking at your bank balance late.

Oh my God, I need the rest.

Producers try calling because what is it?

Oh, it's the end of the show.

I know that's why.

Do you think we come back tomorrow and finish the rest of the story?

Could do an update.

Maybe they could join us.

I mean, they might have just dropped.

They might be walking out now.

They might be about...

Yeah.

They could be getting on the phone.

I could read a couple of other ones on here.

If not, I think part two tomorrow could be a real...

This is what they do on Shortland Street, isn't it?

They do that.

Din, din, din, din, din, din, din.

The clip came out.

Yeah.

Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum.

Ah, somebody else said,

the bank deposited $6,800 into my account.

Yeah.

I was like, fantastic.

And I spent half of it

on one weekend having a blast,

but knowing what I was doing was wrong.

Turns out my mum had taken out a personal loan.

Yeah.

And they had mistakenly put it into my account

instead of hers,

which just had a different suffix.

Half of mum's money.

They threatened to charge her with a criminal offence,

which never happened.

However, I did get taken to Bay Corp,

and my financial situation was incredibly difficult.

So, Vance, you didn't get away with that.

No, you didn't get away with that.

You didn't get away with that.

And possible finalists to see end of the day.

Now, I believe we have...

Sarah has called through.

Good morning, Sarah.

What?

You were the person

that had $9 billion in their bank account.

Yeah, correct.

Oh, my God.

So, where we left the story is...

You transferred $80,000 into your savings account,

and it worked.

Now, what happened?

And it worked.

Then what happened?

Yeah.

So, it was a bit crazy.

I was like a student, 21.

I was sitting in my flat,

and kind of like in the morning,

I jumped onto phone banking

and, you know,

ticked my balance after the big weekend.

And it sees $9 billion.

$900 million.

$1 million.

A lot of that.

And I was like, what?

And I was at the flat,

mates were all crowding around me.

So, I was like, no,

I hung up,

rung back,

no, same balance.

So, I got on my bike

and like bumped down to the ATM,

ticked it,

and I've gone,

you know, back then,

you could get some printouts.

Yep.

Anyway, so I got three of them

because I still didn't believe it.

And then I went back home

and I said,

so, what do you think I should do?

And they're like, okay,

see if you can transfer some money out.

So, I had a savings account.

So, I put,

I don't know why I chose $80 million.

I mean $80,000.

So, I put $80,000 into my savings account

just to see if it could work.

And it did.

So, I think I was like,

the flat mates and I

remember just driving around that day,

thinking, oh my God,

what could I do with all this money?

No, you could save the world.

I don't think I thought of that at 21.

No, no, I'd be like,

this drink's on me.

Yeah, yeah,

that's a lot of sight of back in the day.

Yeah, and so,

then I think it lasted probably a week

before the bank contacted me.

How did that phone call go?

Disappointing, eh?

But yeah, it was very relaxed.

They weren't angry.

I think they were laughed about it.

I'm pretty sure.

I don't,

I think because they would have been

interest,

but very minimal on 80,

you know,

that interest rate was better back then.

But yeah,

and they just,

they apologised to me

for the inconvenience or whatever.

Yeah.

I thought it was better.

Yeah, but they ended up taking it all back

and I just went back to my normal balance.

But it was an amazing few days

and I just rode around thinking that I was...

So you have been a billionaire?

I have.

You were a 21-year-old billionaire.

Wow, wow.

Did you spend any of it?

Like did you extra,

you know,

just did you buy anything above and beyond?

No.

My nickname is St. Sarah.

So transfer into 80,000

was probably the,

yeah,

that's the most I've ever done.

They didn't give you any reward

for the fact that you didn't just,

this is the sort of way.

They could have, aye.

But no, no, they didn't.

This could have been like massive news as well.

Totally.

I know if it had been,

well, no, the funny thing was that most people,

it was in the news,

but most people had had huge amounts taken out

of their Westpac accounts,

not deposited in.

Right.

God, they really had a problem

back in the day, didn't they?

They didn't have a problem.

Someone was willy-nilly, weren't they?

They were willy-nilly with their deposits

and with them.

Wow.

But if it had been now,

you know, with social media,

it would have been all over everything.

Yeah, yeah, great story.

It would have been,

I would have had to call the newspaper,

which, yeah.

Yeah, it wasn't happening.

Incredible story, Sarah.

Formerly a billionaire,

but not anymore.

We're going to argue it with our caller of the week.

Yes.

A $50 Mick Cafe voucher.

Thanks to our friends at Mick Cafe.

A $9 billion Mick Cafe voucher.

We will call you in a week and rectify that.

Well done, Sarah.

Amazing.

See you, see you later.

Actually, I'm going to have to stop you there.

That's copyrighted.

Sue's case was a very good friend of mine.

She's already sued me twice,

so if you could maybe get her to drop her litigious action.

That would be great.

Tell her I'll review her five stars.

Yeah.

If she does the same for this podcast.

Yeah, yeah.

And then she tells all her friends.

And if you're listening,

maybe give it five stars as well.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.