ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 29th September 2023

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The ZM Podcast Network. The Fleece Vaughn and Haley Big Pod. Treat yourself to

McCafe coffee with my MACAs rewards. Good morning, welcome to the show Fleece Vaughn

and Haley, it's two minutes past six. Well, as you heard Sam mention, a lot of beaches closed

because of stormwater, sewerage in the Auckland Harbour. You're going to deal with this in the

top six today on the show Vaughn. Yes, because Auckland famously loves a shut beach or a beach

not safe to swim in over summer. I've got the top six. Other reasons Auckland beaches will be

shut this summer. God. Now, also on the show today, we've all got our kettles in.

Those table full of kettles. This started yesterday. You said you got a new jug and it's really fast.

Yeah, do you know what? And now that I'm here to walk the walk, I'm like, shoot, it better be as

fast as I thought. Fat bottomed girl. Now this fat bottomed girl, this belongs to Shannon,

which I believe is a second hand find. Yeah, that's a Tony Street hand me down.

So I reckon it'll be nice. That'll be really nice. We just saw Tony Street in the lift.

She seems to have blown out her calf muscle. She can't have the walk. She was following along.

Vaughn held the lift for her and we instantly regretted it.

And there was that thing where she took so long to hurry.

Oh, right. We were like, well, don't hurry.

And then she said she did it playing basketball,

but it was way more like a drive-by shooting. Yeah, way more like a drive-by shooting.

So we're going to put your kettle to the test, old Hayley Sproul. We've got the fastest kettle.

Yeah, I reckon I do. Look at that soft. Oh, wait, Vaughn, you missed this. Hang on, ready?

Oh, it softly opens. Yeah, that's why they call it soft.

And also, speaking of a bunch of bubbling spouts, I had a hot pot for dinner last night,

and my gut is... You've got a bubbling spout.

Well, you sought out your bubbling spout. We're going to do the great Kiwi Kettle off

after Aegon the show this morning and see how fast Hayley's kettle is.

Coming up on the show, you've got a new pet. I got two new pets.

God. I got two new pets. Four mouths to feed on the farm.

Add more to them. No, I got them because I had something to feed them.

Right. Okay. But I've never had this animal before as a pet, so this is a first for me.

Next on the show, though, an absolute trauma online. Oh. This is beefing.

I'm really looking forward to seeing the resolution of this beef.

Play Zedem's Fletchworn and Hayley.

Let's just scroll on the grandness of that.

Peruzin. This is wild. Must have been about four o'clock in the afternoon,

and I see a post from the warehouse where everyone gets a bargain.

Yep, correct. I think they think it's something. I don't know if that's sticking.

So it had a picture of a box of wheat bricks,

which claims to be New Zealand's number one breakfast cereal.

But over that, it had a big crying face. Yeah. And I thought,

that was enough for me to be like, that doesn't look like a way to sell a product.

No. Capsion reads, sanitarium have decided to cut off our Weepix supply,

sad crying face, and we need your help. We sell the 1.2 kg family pack for six dollars.

JP, you take Countdown, Karwen, you take New World, Shannon, you take Pack and Save,

and tell me how much those guys are selling a 1.2 kg Weepix for.

Thank you very much, research on the fly. Do you want me to take Faro's?

I could do Faro's or a more Wilson's. You do more for Faro's, should I?

I don't know if the Faro's do. I'll do a borrach organic food market.

Just maybe to see how much roasted muesli, toasted muesli is there.

Well, I know, save you. I'm telling you, you're not getting 1.2 kgs for six dollars.

With coconut flakes. Oh, you toasted coconut flakes.

We sell the 1.2 kg family packs for six dollars. New World, $9.29.

Okay. Let's just keep that in mind. New World selling them for $9.29.

Thank you, Ko. And you win. Oh, no, Gerard might have got it first. No. New World, $9.29.

Pack and save $7.79 and count down $8.20 currently on sale for $7.

The warehouse was selling that same Weepix product for $6 flat. Right.

Not on special, flat. And soon you'll have to go to the supermarket and pay more.

Think that that's not okay. Us too, sick of groceries costing too much.

Us too, sheer thoughts to help us bring Weepix back.

Now, just as an alternative, we could get a 400 gram of pure delish crunchy musli with

coconut flakes. That's going to be $14. Jesus.

$14.99. Now, that's for 400 grams. That's 400 grams.

So times that by three, we're looking at a $45 alternative. Just for our bougie listers and

good morning to them. When you sent this post from the warehouse to the group chat, I was like,

I know your thoughts on sanitarium. Church owned property. If you're not familiar with

the church owned property. It's called a creative accounting that means they don't pay tax on

property. Well, they just don't have to pay tax. I'm all for a little local church not paying tax.

That's fine to me. That runs things like, exactly. That runs things like

Meals on Wheels, getting old people around, all of that. Absolutely. And some churches do.

I'll say it, the Lord's work. They do. And if they own a multimillion dollar business

and they're not paying tax, and then obviously my guess is, and this is purely a guess, the

warehouse buy so many wheat books and sell them at next to zero profit as a price later to get

you to come into the warehouse. And when you're in getting your way to buy other stuff, that's

how it works. This would 100% be what they call a loss leader, a loss leader, a loss leader. So

that gets you into the store. Even if they make no money on it, you're gonna, you're like you say,

you're gonna get a week. So then do you think the supermarkets have gone to sanitarium and said,

it's not fair. Maybe more weeks off you than yeah, maybe the warehouse doesn't. We'll stop selling

them. If you don't do something about this, they're selling them cheaper and it's costing us

a few, few thousand dollars in the scheme of our billion dollar profits. I love the comments on

this post because everyone's laying into sanitarium like, hey, some tax. Oh, come on.

It's very disappointing. This sums it up. Someone called Megan said this sums it up.

I'll just say it's she summed it up. It's so disappointing at a time where people are struggling

to put food on the table. It's especially stinking to take away a staple for so many

from a retailer selling it at the lowest price. It needs to be more affordable sources for Kai,

not less. I agree. I can't believe they posted it. Like no one in the news has picked this up.

Yeah, they have. Have they? Yeah. It's all started happening. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I'm here for this.

It's all been picked up this morning. TVNZ have got stories on it. Stuff, Herald, spin off. Good,

good, good. We love a little public beef. You know, I love watching this drama unfold.

It's just stuff.

I've finally seen something on TikTok and done, not TikTok, Instagram,

Reels, old person TikTok and been like, me, I'm doing it and I did it. You know,

I watch all those restoration videos and I'm like, when I, did you fill in a hole with noodles and

then plaster it over and paint it? Oh my God. Did you buff out a piece of furniture with a walnut?

No. I've actually done two things I saw on TikTok. You've seen it?

Seen it. I've seen it and done it. It's done. You've done it? I've done it. I did it. What have you

done? The first one was I used a car jack to get a post out of the ground. Have you seen that one?

No. You know how it's so hard, like a wooden pole post, like fence post is in the ground and it's

really hard to get out of the ground. You can use like machinery and stuff, but who's got machinery?

How do you get under it to jack it? So what you do is you get another bit of wood and you put

some screws through the bit of wood on the side and put it to the side of the post and then you

put your car jack under that, but you've screwed on and crank, crank, crank, crank, crank. And it

pops out. You're so masculine sometimes. Yeah, I'm actually really horny now. Shaday was very

impressed with that one. She's like, there's no way this is going to work. The car jack's just

going to sink into the ground. Wow. And thanks Instagram reel. Thanks Instagram reel. I've

removed three posts that were annoying me and had been for five years, but I finally did something

about it. So the other thing was this, I could do that with street lights. Yeah, because they do

give it a go. Yeah, good. Okay, we'll screw something into them. Can't see anything wrong with

this plan. Well, what's the second thing you did? The second thing was I followed this like guy in

America who owns this farm. Yeah. And he's like, I finally done it. I finally, I finally got some

goldfish. Oh yeah. For my horse trough. Oh, to keep it fresh. And this is what I remember when I

was a kid, my granddad used to have this because he had horses. Yeah. And they, the goldfish just

live in the trough and eat all like the weed and stuff that grows the slime. And it means you

don't have to clean out your trough. Because the goat's trough, my trough for the goats, it's, I

don't know, I think it's because it's under trees and stuff drops in off the trees. And then it gets

grimy. Your fish aren't going to eat the leaves. How do the goats not eat the fish when they're

supping from the water? The fish, it's quite a deep trough, but it would be

must be nice. Must be nice to have a deep one. I've got a shallow trough at my place.

I'm going to brag it's a deep trough. Yeah. So yeah, I went to a pet store. Yeah. And

there was really fancy goldfish. I was like, no, no, no, I want like a, I want a bog standard.

Like a nemo? Did you get a nemo cup? No, because you got to heat their water. I want a bog

standard invasive species goldfish. A quick up. Yeah. It's a fair way from a waterway. I'm back in

the fact that they'll get eaten by birds before they slip slide out and get into the waterways.

But yeah. And the guy was like, oh, yeah, no, they're out here and took me out and he was like,

yeah, this is the one you want. And I was like, what about that big one over there? He's like,

that little one will become that big one. But I felt like a dick. I was like, oh,

but what, I want a little bit of a big one pointing to a cat and wanting to buy a kitten.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What about a big one? Yeah. Do you do big kittens?

So he's like, yeah, that one will become that. And I was like, Jesus, that's going to get real

big. So what did you do when you introduced him to the trough? Well, I also saw the guy you put,

and I remember this just from other people who had fish, you have to acclimatize them to the pond.

Good. This was a test. That was a trick question. You remember when you bought them as a kid,

you put them in a bag, then you put the bag in the water. Yes, that's what I did. Yeah.

In the trough, I put the bag in the trough. And then how long for an hour?

There's a bog standard, mate. These aren't, these aren't, we'll see. These are the same species that

have invaded our waterways. There'll be fine. There's no stopping them. Yeah. No, whoops.

Okay. And then did you take them out of the bag and they're fine? They swam down to the bottom and

that was the last I saw of them. And then they floated to the top. It was so weird. I will be

cheeky. But also the chickens drink out of this trough. So I'm imagining if there is a dead one

on the surface, the chickens will probably eat that. Oh, nice. Before I see it. So I'll never

know if that's still there. I don't want your fishy eggs. How many fish? Two. Oh, you need more,

I reckon. For a start. Yeah, to start. But no, but that's what the guys said. You don't put more

in because... No, because remember they become big cats. Yeah, they do become big cats. You want

them to just keep it at bay. You don't want to have to feed them. Right. Oh, yeah, of course,

because you don't want to have to go out there and sprinkle some flakes. No, and then you say,

it's not good because then they poop more and then you need to defeat the purpose because then

you need to clean the trough anyway. Look at you go. You can't wait to meet your manky fish.

Yeah, manky little. I want to help you. And then name them. You have to. You name all your pets.

Yeah, I know. No, I don't know. Not yet. Fish fingers. If they survive. Fish and fingers.

Fish and fingers. What's the sea? Well, sea lord and what's the other fish fingers breed?

Tellies to tellies. Tellies fish. I don't know if they've got a... I don't know.

Do we tellies or fish fingers? Fish fingers. Fish fingers NZ one moment caller.

Get some names. Sea lord. We've got shore marina birds eye. Birds eye. Birds eye and sea lord. That's

what I'm calling. Yeah. Okay. I like that. Yeah. Good stuff. Top six is next. Speaking of polluted

waterways. Yep. I've got the top six. Other reasons Auckland beaches will be shut this summer.

Currently shut because of a sinkhole that led to a whole lot of people from

Parnell's poos going on the water. And it's like rich poos. Rich poos. Rich poos.

Oh, I might go for a swim. Get some of that rich rubbing off on me. It's disgusting.

Play ZM's Fletchvorn and Ailey. From the panoramic ZM sink tank. This is the top six.

Hello there. Sinkhole formed. Auckland sewer collapse. Beach closed. I'd bullet pointed.

Yeah. Bullet pointed the story I want to talk about. You've hit the main points there.

Basically everything. Everything that falls in the Waitamata harbour. Don't swim in there.

It's my house. Yeah, dude. You're at the end of it. You're at the end of it. I'm coastal, aren't I?

Yeah. Currently Auckland to the council. Yep. And they're, uh, yeah. They're incessant. They're

boarding me. They're born for you to use stainless steel fixtures, even though that's severely overkill.

And then, I mean, your classic Naranek shut on the shore. Yeah. Naranek's kind of always shut,

so I don't know if it could be blamed for the poos, but all the way out Mission Bay, you won't be

able to get on your bicycle. Well, you know, I love a beach in summer. Go for a bicycle out there.

Yeah. Goodness me. Part of an Auckland central sewer line. 2.1 diameter. Rich people's poos.

So, uh, 13 metres underground says large part of Auckland and where's the collapsed poos.

There's a massive sinkhole. Yeah. So the top six today. The top six are other reasons, not

sinkhole related, uh, that we'll see Auckland beaches closed this summer as we love a close

beach. Okay. Number six on the list. Instagram shoot and you don't meet the aesthetic, my horn.

Yeah. Sorry, hon. Sorry, hon. You don't meet it. We're doing a big shoot. Yeah. And it's all

like sort of neutral. You take the photo. No, yeah, you can take the photo. Then I'll take a photo

of you. I forgot. Number five on the list of the top six are other reasons Auckland beaches will

be shut this summer are jellyfish and they're not nearly as delicious as chocolate fish, trust me.

Yeah, they're not. Yeah. They'll sting you and they're hard to get in your mouth unless you're

stingray. I like a jelly tip. Yeah. Love a jelly tip. And I like chocolate fish.

Just the tip of the jelly. Turkish delights. Yeah. Have you had those because you love Turkish

delights? It does. It's that company that does, they're like drops. They're in like a cardboard

box kind of thing. They're real, they're real yum. You'd love them. Oh, yes, I have. Turkish delights.

Yeah. I haven't.

Donovans do good stuff though. Yeah, they do. I won't eat their Turkish delights,

but they do. Everything else they're throwing out there. Number four on the list of the top

six are the reasons Auckland beaches will be shut this summer are a wild pack of Chihuahua

Bijon Maltese crosses. Yeah. They're wild and they're a very dangerous, dangerous dog and they're

also just doing poops everywhere. Aucklanders love those dogs. Oh, they love. Be careful.

Any visitors, stupid little crossbred march, don't they? Number three on the list of the

top six are the reasons Auckland beaches will be shut this summer. No, Mr. Whippy will service the

area. We might as well shut the beach. Yeah. If Mr. Whippy's not going to pull up at some stage

throughout the day and give us the, they don't want to be near the poops. Ding, ding, ding, ding,

ding, ding, then I'm done here. Oh, yeah. Number two on the list of the top six are the reasons

Auckland beaches will be shut this summer. A dangerous amount of rips in dude's pants from

all the lunges and squats and tight pants. Yeah, bro. Crossfit on the beach, bro. Yeah, yeah,

yeah. Beach fitness, man. Fitness is not just for indoor, in gyms. It's outside. Fitness,

never-quitness. Wow. That's, we should start a gym. Fitness, never-quitness. Yeah, cool. Fitness,

fitness, never-quitness. Yeah. And number one on the list of the top six reasons Auckland beaches

will be shut this summer. Serious game of backyard crooked underway. Shit's getting pretty wild.

It started like pretty like casual, but some competitive dudes. Someone stormed off. I'm

very competitive. Yeah, someone threw a bat at somebody else. They ducked. One of my favorite

things in summer at the beach is seeing people get hit by a rogue rugby ball or a tennis ball.

Same. It's so good. Especially like a chick's like trying to play cool. Yeah. It's like a soccer ball

of the head. You're like, or a vortex mega howler coming. Yeah. And you're like,

because that pointed like a missile. That's the most substance.

Do you know what's great is you see his albums out three weeks from today and he's

here. It's so good. It's so good. Yeah, it is two weeks today. Two weeks today. Yeah. I love this.

Now Courtney Shields in the US. She's a, I guess an influencer of sorts. Okay. A person who

shares a life on the talk and she has shared the three quote unquote mean one liners she uses to

humble men get under their skin and make them obsessed with you. What? So she's negging guys

and they are lapping it up. Yeah. Now I will say it's not the only thing that's getting the guys.

Oh, she's hot. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. No. Yeah. I mean, yeah. Yeah. What do you mean? Yeah.

Like she's like, she's British. US. Oh, US. American. Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

Bit much. That puts me off. Really? Bit much. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. The, the accent you've got to be

super hot for me to put out there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. So here's what she uses and she's sort

of framed them to, she's like tailored them depending on the people that she's on a date with.

You try, try the first one on Vaughn. Okay. So this is one that I'd use on a gym bra, right?

You love the gym. I always go no gym bra. No, you gym like almost every day.

So you're a gym bra? You're a gym bra. Just impressive. So she says you got to use this

on someone who's very athletic. Looks like he cares about his appearance.

Appearance. Yeah. And he's a bit sporty. He cares about his parents. He cares about his parents.

Mow him down. Make him feel like a piece of shit for it. So I would look at you on a date

and then I'd look at your body and I'd be like, you look like a big pickleball guy.

Like a ping-a-pong or table tennis. No. No, pickleball is more competitive than that,

but not as competitive as squash. It's padded tennis basically what we always call padded

tennis. Yeah. And it's an embarrassing sport. It's become huge in America. Yeah. It's huge in

America, but it's silly. But not one guy who rates himself as a bit of a gym bra.

Like a muscley gym bra. I'd be like, do you play pickleball? You look like you play pickleball.

He's like, oh my God. Absolutely throwing me back with that one. And the next one,

she is tailored for the player. Now this is someone with a bit of, I might just throw this one to

Fletch. Okay. Just, you know, it's my turn. It's your turn. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Best

suited for someone with a reputation of being a bit of a player. Yeah. If you want them to view

you differently, you don't need to play hard to get. You need to actually be hard to get. Yeah.

So I would see that you would be playing all your techniques, right? Try to get me because

you're a player and you know how to get a woman into the sack. Does he want? Does I want? In the

middle of him talking, you're doing all your techniques. Just go, this is going to be very hard

for you. Okay. Challenge accepted. That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Yeah. Yeah. She's like,

you're just going to throw him because he's just so used to just getting what he wants.

You mean what's going to be hard for me? This. Getting what you want? Yeah. Wow. Okay. Yeah.

Now the third one's for a tall guy. Now if Aaron was here, I would throw this to him. She said

anyone over six foot. To Vaughn because Vaughn's what, six to? Yeah. Okay. Vaughn, back to you.

And with his Timberlands on. Okay. Six, three almost. Yeah. So this is probably, I guess you'd

have to do this maybe on a second date that we're having. She says, don't do this to someone short

because it's just going to come out as rude. And we're just trying to be playful for this.

Yeah. So you're clearly very tall. And I'd say, guys, remember you being a bit taller.

Wow. That is really going to put a tall person in this place, isn't it?

She sees that men drive themselves crazy with this because he's already like,

I'm tall. That's one of my best features. Yeah. People are loving this.

She's like, playfully neg them and then that'll get them wanting you.

Yeah. And the girls are hopping on and saying, I used this. I used the height one last weekend.

He was so offended. He took out his ID to confirm he's six foot tall. I suppose in America,

they've got their height on it. Yeah. Yeah. I used to do it. Like, but I'd do it to females,

obviously. I'd say things like, I remember your boobs being bigger. See how it doesn't feel good

when it's coming back the other way. I see how it doesn't feel good. Also, my boobs have never been

bigger. That's why.

That's silly little poll. Silly little poll. Silly little poll. Silly little poll.

Today's silly little poll. I would like to preempt today's silly little poll by we are not

encouraging shoplifting. We don't want to hear that we've encouraged shoplifting. We are huge

fans of the retail sector. The thing is when people shoplift, it puts all of our prices up.

Yeah. And prices are already up. I don't know if you guys noticed. No one supports the retail

sector quite like me. You are a champion. I am an absolute advocate. You are. But there is an

article that's come out about the typical shoplifter. This is from the UK. Yes. Middle-aged women are

doing it for the thrill of it. Studies found more people than ever are committing petty

theft because of the thrill of it. And we asked, be honest, have you? Yeah. 15% of people said yes.

85% said no. So that's good. An overwhelming majority saying no. Remember that time I was

with you and you accidentally shoplifted an avocado? Well, it was one of those times you

go to the supermarket and you're like, I don't need a basket. And then you get a bachelor's

handbag, a couple of rolls, a couple of bits and pieces. And then you're like, avocado,

put that in the hoodie pocket, full arms on the thing. Well, you didn't self-serve that day,

did you? I can't remember. And then got out was walking up. I've been looking over my shoulder

ever since. Yeah, I know. Because you don't know when they're going to come. You don't want to hang

out with the bad sort. Statutes of the limitations. That's not a thing in New Zealand. No, let's

hear from some people that. Okay, Vicky, I tried once for the supermarket as a teenager,

but I was not subtle at all and got caught. That's the thing. When I'm going around the

supermarket, I see people shoplifting and I'm like, Jesus, like bees calm about it. It's all real,

like, anxious, jaggedy, looking around, body language is all cooked. Yeah. But yeah, not that

I'm trying to teach them to be a bit of a shock. And I love going up to the information desk. Oh,

you've knocked, haven't you? Yeah, multiple times. Yeah, I would. Hi. They're like, hi. I'm like,

I'm that person over there's just rammed a steak up their skirt. Which one is the one walking?

The one walking funny. The one walking like she's got a steak up her. The steak juice dribbling

down the leg. Brianna said, I clicked no, then I remember I used to eat grapes around the supermarket

before checking out. And there was this one time in Australia where I decided I'd had enough grapes

at that point. I actually went and put the rest back. Oh, my God. So that's a soft shop lift.

No, that yeah, that's naughty. Soft shop. Ham. I wonder as a kid, you get those free bread rolls

at the supermarket. I'd hollow out the inside, fill them up with pick and mix lollies, close it up

and eat the lollies when I got home. Oh, you little shit. He has a rogue subclass thief amongst us.

You just go up, scoop it in and shove it. Slowing it into a bloody, oh my God. You think he dug

out the bread and dumped it in a breadcrumbs, Hansel and Gretel situation around the supermarket?

What do you think? He just compacted the bread. Oh, either would work. I would. But if you hollowed

it out, you'd eat a lot more lollies in there. You're totally, you know, that's a great idea.

Like a Trojan bun. Emily said, I haven't yet, but I have intrusive thoughts about it all the time.

Just take it. You've got to say no to your intrusive thoughts.

Pop in your pocket. It's so weird. It's a weird thrill. Yeah. You could go and do something free

that's legal and thrilling, but you don't. You want a shop lift. It's bizarre. Moana said,

I'm 30 now, but when I was 14, I stole a $3 Shrek ornament from my local supermarket to see what

it felt like. Well, it still eats me up. She's looking over her shoulder every day. I've never

walked out of there so quickly. My God. Damn life thinking I was going to jail. If I got caught,

scared me shitless. Never again. Safe to say my criminal days are well behind me.

You know, that's a little lesson, isn't it? It's a learning lesson. Daniel said drunk

Daniel steals things. Uh-oh. And then sober Daniel has to return them the next day. Oh,

sober Daniel is going to get in trouble one day. Yeah. So we're going to get a punch in the face

meant for drunk Daniel embarrassing going back though. Yeah. Hey, I stole the does getting

an online beauty loop one day, then going into the store the next day and getting a second beauty

loop counters as petty theft. If so, I don't understand. What is that? No, it doesn't. What is

that? Mecca Beauty Mecca Cosmetica. Yeah. If the more you're in these loops and every sort of

season you get a box. I've done this before when they've they've sent me one online and then I've

gone into the store. They're like, here's your beauty loop. And you're like, thank you freebies

and samples and talked to each other quick enough. Yeah. Excuse me. Bless you, child.

I won't really came from nowhere. I'll be worried about you sneezing that hard to be honest.

So hard before the sneeze came out. Um, so there you go. Fiona Stollen, uh,

Neve, who spells her name Neon said, I stole a capsicum the other day. Just wanted to make

for heater part pasta. I was missing a capsicum, but no bloody way. I was paying $5.50 for a capsicum.

Not going to lie. It was a little bit thrilling and dinner was yummy. You've got to get the frozen

capsicums. Get a massive pack for like the cost of one single capsicum frozen capsicums. Yeah,

like little chopped up bits of capsicums. Oh, I love that. Best thing which is making fajitas.

Yeah. You put them in the max and they go. Slice. Slice. No. Fajitas sizzling fajita

bladder. You've got to have fresh crunch. It's better than going to prison. I am not saying

what she did was right, but I'm also saying, so you stand by this thief and solidarity. Well,

only because it's only for $5.50 capsicums. Okay, we have chocolate news. Yummy. Yummy.

A segment of the show where we take a look at new food products, new food items,

the shelves, rumours. Hello, chocolate lovers. I just want to say,

moments ago, Hayley said, so what are you, what are your words? It's so much fun having no respect

for yourself, as Hayley said. I ate hot pot last night. First time a hot pot. Well overdid it,

have been to the toilet multiple times. Talk about that later in the show. We've just got cheese scones,

not Fletch, because he's being a good boy. We've just got cheese scones. And then when you

said we're doing this yummy yummy and it's about chocolate, I said, where is this goddamn chocolate?

My stomach, my whole system's collapsing. And I'm like, put more in, more in, more in, more in.

It's like there's a sinkhole in Panela and that is my guts. And I'm just trying to fill it with more

sinkhole stuff. Yeah. Wow. Sinkhole away, baby. I'll be right by your side. Now,

Whittaker's has done a, oh no, it's been released early. Oh no, it's a leak. Oh my God, someone's

leaked this. You guys heard about that? No. It is a new block. Whittaker's is that girl that always

was like, I'm going to fail this exam. Whittaker's is that girl, I'm in hospital. Yeah. I'm not telling

you why. So what happened? I was like, I hadn't grown hair. Yeah. Okay. No, but we love them. God,

they're delicious. We love them. So Whittaker's chocolate seemed to mark it before it was officially

meant to be. The company has said. Oh, accidental. A shop in Australia spotted this. It is a candy cane

block. So this is a Whittaker's chocolate block with peppermint candy cane pieces in their 33%

cocoa cream milk chocolate. No, I don't know. I'm not a candy cane. It's mint. I'm candy cane. I'm

candy cane. I'm candy cane. It's mint and it's hard bits in a chocolate. Yeah. No, it's a no from

because last year they did the gingerbread block for the festive season. This is their 2023 version.

Oh, I'm just scrolling through this article. It's my boyfriend, Greg Grover from Nova.

Is it an ad? Hello. Yep. Good placement. So they said while we had planned to keep this under wraps

until closer to Christmas, it's not possible anymore. Of course it's not. God, I mark it too early.

So I'm going to buy that. I definitely have a little bit of that. And then in other chocolate

news, we move away from chocolate lovers because we head to the world of Mars. That's the company

that does bounty. I think so. Yeah. So we usually do what's our one party favourites. The favourites.

Party favourites. Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. And then there's the other brand's version of it, which is

celebrations. Yes. Which is mostly in the UK. Right. Celebration box. We don't have it as much.

It's got a little mini Malteser, a Snickers, rather than we've got a Morro.

Yes, we've got Morro. No, that's Capri. That's in the favourites. The Morro.

Yes, we've got Morro. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. But this has Mars and Snickers.

Right. Okay. You know. Yep. And they've got the bounty. And now a lot of people try to

sign a petition to remove the bounty, saying that it's feral.

So the bounty is to the celebration box, what Turkish delight or cheery ripers to the favourites.

I won't hear a bad word about you. No, neither, because I love both of them.

Yeah. But yes, it's like most people are like, ooh. So then what they've done

has released a all bounty celebrations box. Oh, I would eat it. Where it's all just the

mini bounties. I would love that. I love bounty bars. I like bounty bars if they're deep fried

at the local fish and chip shop. Do you remember those? Do you know how they used to,

our local, they had deep fried Mars bars? I remember deep fried Mars bars. But if you went

next door to the dairy, you could buy any bar. My mum used to buy bounty bars. Because they

like BYO bars, coconut BYO bars. How much did they charge you to take it back? It was like

a dollar or something to fry it. That's pretty good. Man, the 90s rule day. Yeah, it was loose.

You ever try a crunchy bar? That wouldn't work. I wouldn't be good because all the

pokey would melt. Just a suggestion. I mean, this is delicious. And then there's now a petition

as well to bring back the dark bounty because they were removing it because they're like,

it didn't really sell. And everyone's like, no, it's delicious. Did they do a cherry bounty

for a while? I feel like that was the thing once. It's a cherry ripe, isn't it? Yeah, it's a cherry

ripe. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I'm going to wrap my lips around this one because one day,

because it sounds delicious. Next on the show, scientists have recreated what they call the

scariest noise in the world, the Aztec Death Whistle. Sounds like this.

It's a 41 year old man making that noise. That's the scariest noise in the world.

And I'm as disgusted as you are. I'm going to come out of my mouth. I'm going to play you this

noise next. Play it. Get it in, switchboard and hilly. Well, the Aztec Death Whistle has been

recreated with Aztec corn chips made the natural way.

When you said Aztec, because I was immediately taken natural way,

they're in your store. No, that's a 90s advertising. That was for a brand of corn

chip that took on CCs. And the ad was Aztec corn chips made the natural way. And then a person,

I'm guessing a white voiceover artist doing a Mexican voice and saying,

they're in your store today. That's right. That's right. Problematic. Problematic. So they

found this Aztec Death Whistle in 1999. Now it was found in the hand of a headless skeleton

during the excavation of an Aztec temple in Mexico City. And at first they were like, oh,

it's just a toy. And that's, it wasn't until later, 15 years later, for some reason,

they just say for some reason, one of the scientists blew into the hole like a whistle.

And that is when this noise came out, which they are calling the scariest sound in the world.

Okay. Now apparently they would use this whistle to,

what do you, when you throw someone to the gods? Sacrifice. Yes. That was the word I was looking

for. He says so casually like he does the most. I believe you're talking about a blood sacrifice.

Okay. Yes. Into the volcano. I believe so. And then you'd give this little whistle a tooth. Yes.

Great. Let's hear it. The god of wind.

So that's what they were sacrificing for. Yeah. Okay. Are you ready? Now you can't

unhear this noise. It's terrible. It's horrible. Because you know, I find a very haunting noise,

not scary but haunting. The claws. Yeah. That rules. Okay. Are you ready for the Aztec Death

whistle? Yeah. Oh my God. That made Vaughn shit himself because I know he had the hot pot dinner

last night with the spicy food. Oh my God. It felt like someone grabbed me. It felt like I was being

touched. One more time. No, thank you. One more time. I'm in flight of flight. Look. My nipples

are in flight of flight. Because I'm in flight of flight. Is that a whistle? It's a good one.

I'll show you. I don't like it at all. I don't like it at all. It looks like an ornament someone

would have in their backyard with the water spouting out of it. Curse item. Curse item. I want to hear

it again. No, I don't. That was horrible. That is horrible. That's what I imagine hell sounds like.

That is constant. Oh, it's done something to my neck. Yeah. Literally when you played it,

it felt like I was being grabbed from behind. That's why I had to get out of here. Oh my God.

Apologies. I don't like it. Listeners. Please. Play some like Miley Cyrus or something.

So here's the story. I am off to Christchurch straight after the show. I'm performing two

shows tonight at the piano in Christchurch. Sold out. Sold out. So don't even bother

crying to get there. The piano. The piano. It's an amazing venue. It's like a concert hall.

It's stunning. I'm really, really looking forward to it. Six and eight o'clock. I'm a hard worker.

Wow. You're doing two shows back to back. I said to her back to back. Yeah. Yeah, I know.

Anyway, so Aaron's coming down with me because my fiance because Aaron's brother and our sister-in-law

and their, our nieces live down in Christchurch. We're like, well, we'll stay the night and then

the next night we'll go stay with the gals and we'll hang out with the kids and come back on Sunday.

So I booked Aaron a flight a while back and I got exit row seats, what not, da, da, da, da.

And then yesterday we had a really stressful day with the house things and we were like,

oh, and I said, guys, just need to get my head around getting to Christchurch tomorrow. So I

started getting us all organized and I was packing my bags and I was like, well, I get two bags

because I'm Kauru Gold. Wow. What about old Jade over here? Lifetime Jade.

Hi guys. I got to pay for every bag now. I made a misbooking last weekend and turned on the

charm because you know, work pays for us to have Kauru. So that means if I book one bag,

I get a second bag for free. Yeah. So I booked Shaday and I tickets. However,

accidentally put the seat and bag under Shaday's name. Oh man. This is what I said to that.

This is what I said to the lady at the airport. She's like, oh, you only got one bag here. I was

like, okay, what's she an old girl? They love me. I was like, this is what happens when you let

this guy in charge and then Shaday rolls her eyes and then I play the incompetent bumbling husband

that have made sitcoms hit since the eighties and they were like, that's fine. We'll just work.

I did. And then on the way back, I did it with a guy. I was like, this is never going to work.

And then it did. Oh, you're a bisexual flutter. Charmer. Yeah. He's a charming boy. Well,

I was packing up my bags and then like, I was trying to think about Aaron's stuff and Aaron

always needs a bag because he's a big boy, you know, he's got big, big pants, big pants, man,

big hoodies. And so I said to Aaron, I was like, do you, did I book a bag on your flight? And he

was like, I don't know. And I said, well, can you look up the flight? Yeah. He said, did you email

it to me? I said, I don't have anything. And I went through my email. I was like, for God's sake,

Aaron's not a tech guy. I was like, he never uses his ear points. It's not on his app. It's not there.

And I was like, I sent it to you. So then I went back into my emails, couldn't find anything.

He couldn't find anything. I was so frustrated. I just needed to know. So I called in New Zealand.

An hour and a half later, I was still on hold. I don't wait. I don't wait. I've got a busy brain.

If you make me wait longer than 10 minutes, I start getting very frustrated. So an hour and a

half later, I was stewing and I couldn't work it out. So then I was like, I just need to find

this flight. Like, what if it doesn't exist? So I went through all of our bank accounts

during the time in which I'd booked my flight, found my flight, could not find it.

Like, could not find it literally anywhere. And then I went through Aaron's bank accounts,

no sign of it. Kept calling in New Zealand, could not get hold of them.

The flight doesn't exist. I just didn't book Aaron a flight.

You imagined booking him a flight?

So we had a conversation. Aaron's like, Aaron's already been through the last thing you're like,

it's all done. That's what would have happened. Yeah.

Because I paid extra for me to sit in an exit row, and I wish I only would have done if I

would have been sitting next to Aaron. But I'd done us on a separate booking because I wasn't

sure if he was going to be able to make it. So somewhere there's some confusion.

Sorry, did you just say, I'd done us on a separate booking?

I'd done us on a separate booking. What am I saying wrong there?

Wait, you went to a private school. You should know better than that.

So I'd done us on a second book, a separate booking.

No, she's off to Christchurch today. She might just be getting into the mood, you know?

I'm dropping in.

You're dropping in?

I'm dropping in his character.

Shots fine.

Returning to the mother land.

Wow, shots fine. Everybody can see the tickets to the show tonight.

Anyway, here's the thing. I need Aaron to help me. I'm doing two shows on my own.

He needs to help me pack in, set up the lights. He's worked in the theatre. I need him there.

The girls, our nieces, have been counting down with little link trains,

chains, the days until we get there. No, it's really cute. They bloody love us.

And then I was like, well, now we're going to disappoint them and you're not going to come.

So I was like, look, we just have to book a flight. I don't even know if the original flight

actually exists or not because Air New Zealand want to pick up the phone.

People were messaging me on Instagram saying they'd waited four hours. I was like,

This is what happens when this would never have happened when Christopher Luxton was in charge.

Well, if Christopher Luxton was in charge, he would have sorted this right out,

but he's not anymore. He's trying to run the country.

So I was like, look, we just have to book new flights. I was getting so stressed. It was not good.

So I hopped on Air New Zealand and I looked at them and I was like, okay.

And I just paid for them. And Aaron was like, did you book tickets? I said, yes. He said,

how much? I said $900. And that's on me. $900. Did you check Jetstar?

Like scenario run. Famously known for their leg room.

The only thing that was going to make this all okay is that I can take Aaron,

my poor boyfriend, into the Kauru lounge and he can enjoy a free glass of bubbles.

I love seeing tall people waiting on those other seats. Tall people,

especially at airports when they've decided to sit in a seat made for a child.

Yeah. No, we just couldn't have it. So look, see you tonight, Christchurch.

Do you have some kind of Alzheimer's early on seat or something?

100%. I said to Aaron, I was like, Hey, heads up. This is life. This is life with me.

You're exhausted. I'm exhausted. Imagine what it's like for me.

Well, I've been trying to, as often as I can, given my lifestyle at the moment,

get back to the gym with the help of my dear friend, Carl Peter Fletcher.

And we've been going to, I would say Les Mills is most intense class that they offer a ceremony.

It's like it's almost cross fitty. It's high intensity. Yeah.

Moving around different stations and just blowing out for 45 minutes.

Do you say hello to people that you see at the gym? Yeah, on a semi-regular basis.

Yeah. People say hello to Fletcher. He goes so often that they're always like yelling at him

in the class. They're like, yeah, Fletcher. They think he is Lesley Mills. No. Are you Lesley Mills?

Lesley. No, you got a shout out yesterday. Yeah, I did. Cause I stopped for a bit and he said,

move it Haley. I don't see. That's what I don't like about gym classes.

But that's what I pay for. Like that. I love that. I can do it, but I don't like me.

If I'm stopping for a break, it's because I need a break. No, they do it. It's

playboy laughing with you. Don't tell me to keep going. The instructor who we had yesterday,

if you pause, he's all good, but you've got to dance a little bit. You've got to like keep moving

to keep going. That's what, and spin class, the trick was turning the bike right down to easy.

Yeah, you can tell. You can tell. Cause your legs like, huh, huh.

Anyway, so during this, I'd say about halfway through, Fletcher and I are side by side on,

we just done the skis odd that we're doing these like lunges, right?

And I got that feeling that I haven't had in years at the gym when you push yourself a bit hard

and you are going to vomit. And you know where it's like your, your throat starts going,

you get that, you get that saliva. It starts, it starts coating the throat for the vomit.

Ready for the vomit. And then I,

this is the human body. Amazing.

He did. It's like still up. And I started feeling really nauseous. So I just like paused for a

moment. And that's when the lovely instructor was like, are you all right? And I was like,

I'm good. And anyway, I made a little bit of a comeback and I, you finished, you finished a class.

I finished the class, but it reminded me that Fletcher and I are trying to get our mutual friend

Leon to come and join this class, but he said he's too scared because I once dragged him to

grit years ago and he threw up afterwards. And you nearly threw up yesterday. I nearly threw

up yesterday. I would be like, I'm surprised more people don't throw up at the gym. Well,

that's what I want to know is when did you throw up at the gym? Because so many people do or like

going to like in public. Yeah. Yeah. People would have a, a Chinese at school and it would just

set off all the sympathy spears, which I was when I was a kid. That always happens on the

end. Okay. Yeah, we'll go all of public. We're not doing drunk Chinese. That's just happens.

Grow up. Get it out and carry on. Yeah. But yeah, when did you throw up in public and why?

And like, how bad was it? Yeah. I remember I threw up at my mum's work once after school

because I had a whole bag of bluebird chicken chips.

That is bad constitution.

That's why I can't eat. I was like high school, but I think I was

No, I was just already, I think I had a tummy bug or something.

Oh, here you go. Now I come to the excuses because someone can't handle a bag of chips.

And I didn't get to the toilet in time. So it was in like the corridor.

They're mostly so horrible as a parent, your kids that you don't want them there.

Everyone's like, Oh God, they bought their kid to work. And then he has a Johnny on the floor.

Oh God. I can't help it. I'm still cute.

Okay. So we want to take some calls. Maybe it was at the gym. Maybe it was an embarrassing,

you push yourself too much, push yourself too far, running up a hill during a CrossFit.

Yeah. Whenever you are bombed in public and we're not taking the drunk vom stories,

we want the soba or sick bombs. Yes. Okay. Sorry, the messages are already coming in.

And I was like, Oh, that's right. When we do these gross photos, it's gross.

Right now though, Hailey, you came very close to bombing at the gym yesterday.

In the middle. It was touching go. It was really touching go.

Some of these stories are gross and some of them make me so happy.

This is the one that says about rainbow zine. Did it just sprayed?

It's my dream to see someone spew on a ride.

So when did you vomit in public is what we want to know? Tash, where did this happen?

Hi. I was on an airplane, which is not particularly uncommon. I get air sick, but

I was feeling really unwell just as we were landing. And you know that the seatbelt sign was on.

Yeah. I tried to stand up, but the air host gave me the evil death.

I'm about to tune. Yeah. So I sat back down and I grabbed one of those little papers there

because they give you and I tried to read the script. Please throw up in that.

The guy sitting next to me wasn't please. There is nothing discreet about vomiting.

Hey, yeah. There's no way you can be like, especially if you're like me, you're like

anonymous. When did you vomit public? Oh, sorry, my phone. I vomited when I was working

part time. This is going back a few years at our local New World store. And I worked there too,

which made it worse. And I come in from lunch and I don't know why I jumped in a leader of Primo

or Zephyr. What flavor? It was banana, wasn't it? No, it was chocolate. It was chocolate.

Yeah. And we had, you'd go through the shop and then there was the galley and then behind the galley

was the butchery and there was stairs up to go to the staff room and I was running late and I went

up stairs and I vomited. I vomited everywhere. It went all over the stairs and just cascaded.

Just cascaded. Beautiful use of the word. Very discreet. Beautiful use of the word cascaded.

Oh, wait. So you stunk out of New World. Yeah. And it's run through that. And so you had to,

there was a door out the back of the butchery and you opened that door but it sort of walked

through the shop. It wasn't in New New World with all the window, you know, the glass and window.

This could have been you yesterday, Hailey. I know. So close. Stinging out the whole

Les Mills. We want to know when you had a vom in public because you came very close yesterday.

So close. Literally like.

That's how I make Jennifer Coolidge.

I'm going to spill. Oh, no. This is reminding me really these chicks that we're just all babies.

We're just all dumb babies in these dumb bodies. We're big bags of me. I said that to Shana last

weekend when she was like, why'd you do that for us? I'm just a big dumb bag of me. You are.

Kirstie, when did you have a vom in public?

On the jet boat of Pleatstown. Are you on the jet boat now?

You were on the shot over. Yes. Oh, no, please tell me you're at the back.

We did the last spin right in front of the camera at the dock.

Okay. Where did it go?

Luckily it went over the side, but we just had third burger for breakfast.

The first time we'd ever had it too. So it was great.

I guess you had to go again because you were empty. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Make room.

You need a refurgen. A refurgen is what they call it. Kirstie, thanks for your call.

Some messages. So many. Okay. So these are some of my favorites. So many. Somebody said,

you know those people that wrap Christmas presents at the mall? Yeah. Oh, hungover,

wrapping presents. Oh, no. My little kid was eating something. I couldn't even tell you what it was.

Very smelly. Vomited all over the Christmas presents. That's good stuff. That's good stuff.

Oh, my God. Somebody else said, I was really sick. I tried to call in sick to work. I worked on

the checkouts and they said, you've pulled this before, get to work or you've lost your job. So

I went in and while the joke was on then, when I spewed on the conveyor belt, the conveyor belt

just kept going and dragged the spew all around. You reckon the little bits of corn got stuck in

the hole between them? Yeah, but didn't pile up enough to stop off the little sensor.

Oh, no. My Nana gave me food poisoning. I said, Nana, I don't think this food's cooked. And she

said, how dare you? And then the next morning took me to church where I've projectile vomited

exorcist styles all the way through the church. Nana was so embarrassed, she made me walk home.

Nana was the one that gave you the food. They gave you the sec. Ruthless.

Nana sounds like a bitch. He sounds like a crazy bitch. I was at Rambo's End. Here we go. We've

got our vomiting off the ride situation. I vomited off the side of the old rocking pirate ship.

Oh, it does. It's not a bad ride, but it just gently gets you. I'd had a frozen Fanta just

before the ride. So it was just this foamy cold orange mess that was scattered on people.

Don't say foamy. Don't say foamy when we're talking about this.

I was playing rugby league after 15 minutes of constant running after no exercise for six months.

I subbed myself off. I don't think you can do that. And then I sat down on the side and

spewed everyone thought I had a concussion. Something grand is coming to Nemicolon. Opening

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Nemicolon has the key. Visit Nemicolon.com for more information.

Hello there and welcome to the great Kiwi kettle off.

I love this. You read these messages that I've just got.

Okay, so Boyd has had a very angry message from his wife.

Why the eff have you taken the kettle? And I replied in capital letters,

we're having a kettle race. And she said a whole bunch of angry faces. So if you're listening,

just chuck a pot on the stove. Yeah, tell her about putting a pot in some water in the pot.

It's going to blow her mind. Yeah, I was going to say tell her to pop over to our house and ask

Aaron for help. Take it out. Kettle. No kettles at the house. Haley had the audacity to come into

work yesterday and say, I've got a fast kettle. I've got a bloody nice, bloody expensive fast kettle.

And then I was challenged to a kettle off and I accepted people that have had a cup of tea or

coffee at your house. Always you allege say you've got a fast kettle. Yeah. Yeah. And even because

I'm not a huge kettle user, because we've got a coffee machine. Yeah. Pause for a pause.

Whenever I boil it, I'm always like, yeah, that's pretty fast. Okay. Well, it's just a kettle.

They're all the same. It's not all the same. They've got an element in them. You press the button.

Georgia, on an outside perspective, we've got six kettles on this table. Which one looks the flash

ist? Because you don't know who's kettles, who do Georgia? I do know who. You do know who's kettles

I know who they are. Okay. Well, who's do you like?

Thank you. I've got a nice kettle. I like Tony Streets fat bottom girl here.

Tony. So let me get this right. Shannon, because our producers have brought in their kettles.

Shannon, you this is a hand me down from one of New Zealand's favorite broadcasters, Tony Streets.

Yeah, about radio villain, Tony Streets. You used to work for Tony Streets, but then she hit you

and the company adopted you as a risk, as a rescue producer. And you've got a couple of bad habits,

but we're being very patient. All our producers are rescue. We want to avoid you know, we don't shop,

we adopt. Maybe about a week into working with her. She, so this is like three years ago. She's

like, here you are. Welcome to coast and gave me a kettle. I don't even recognize that brand. What

is the riches? And I've never googled it, which is weird because when a rich person gives you

something, you always go, how expensive was that? And I've never googled it. It's $200. It's $200.

Oh my Lord. Your kettle is $10 more expensive than my was. You know,

when you're upgrading from a $200 kettle, what kind of kettle are you buying?

Yeah. Well, I wanted the Dolce and Gabbana Smig one, which is $1,700. You didn't buy that one.

I was told I wasn't allowed. So because you said my kettle's so fast.

We have all brought in our kettles and they are sitting on a table with each,

exactly one liter has been placed into the kettles. The producers have worked hard on this behind

the scenes. My prediction is that we're going to blow that wall. We've got a surge block, multi

blocks, and there's no way it's going to be able to handle that draw. Jared's going to come in and

hold his finger on the surge button. Just stop it clicking on. Is that safe? I think that's.

That's kosher. Well, they know they did a test and it didn't blow them. It didn't blow the circuit.

Okay. So what we've done, we've got each of our kettles on, they're plugged into the same thing.

They have exactly one liter of tap temperature water. Yep.

The literally they got filled up as the tap. We turn the tap on and we let it run till it got to

a constant temperature and then fill them up one liter at a time. Six jugs. We're going to have a

kettle off. Now race to see who's kettle will boil at the fastest. Now I want to know is the boiling

water clicks itself off? Yes. Okay. And is your flash kettle set up to do that? Because your flash

kettle's got temperature controls. Yeah. So it switches off at 100 degrees. Okay. And I also

have a, the temperature counts up as it gets hotter. We'll actually have a running, a running

like commentary of how hot the water is. I reckon if this is what I put on a bid or a vote,

9 6 9 6. We've got Haley's beautiful. That's the one we're racing against really. The blue.

The blue Breville. The Breville blue. Yeah. We've got Fletcher's white KitchenAid. We've got Vaughn's

black Anko. I'm a man of the people. I've got a Kmart kettle. What can I say? Yeah. We've got

Shannon's hand me down. You didn't know you had a Kmart kettle. I learned this morning at 405 and

I was livid. We've got Shannon's hand me down. Tony Street. Tony Street. With a brand that I've never

seen in my life. Jared, what are you rocking there? That's a cambrook. That's a cambrook.

Must be nice. And then Karwin's got sort of a cheap looking white jug.

Racing Russell Hobbs. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Russell Hobbs. If I had to vote for,

is it a Russell Hobbs? It's a Russell Hobbs actually. I didn't think it was a Russell Hobbs.

I want to, I want to be clear. This is not my joke. Because I was going to say out of all the jugs,

that's the one I wouldn't leave unattended. Yeah. It's a homemaker. I've never even heard of that.

Okay. So we've got a lot of votes coming in for white KitchenAid. Okay. A lot of people really

up in the Ancoe. Up the Ancoe, man of the people. It's the people's kettle.

I reckon Streeties, I reckon Streeties is, Streeties X jug that now belongs to Shannon. I

reckon that's, that's my favorite. Do you know all I want to happen is Haley's to not be the first.

That's the only thing you care about. Dude, people are invested in this. They want us to Instagram live.

Someone is spending $500 on the street. Are we able to, are we able to Instagram live this so

people can watch? Or is that too hard basket? I can Instagram live on mine. No, because you'll

get the followers. Yeah, exactly. Shut it. Where's the FVH one logged in on whose phone?

Or what's the, what's the social media plan here? We should have checked this off here. Yeah,

no, I'm going to make a video. So she's making a video. No, she doesn't want you

uploading a video. Okay. So that's not on her video. Okay. We're going to come back next

and we're going to race our kettles in the great Kiwi Kettle off.

During next week, I reckon we do, I reckon we do toast. Next week, we toast our toasters.

Great toast to the test. See you there. See you there. All right, then she would do toasted

sandwich machine. Yeah, wait, wait a minute. Just our appliances. Can't wait for blend a week.

Hello there and welcome to the great Kiwi Kettle off.

Well, Haley came into work and said, I've got a fast kettle. I do have a fast kettle.

Well, we're going to test it because we've all brought our kettles and producers

and all we've got six kettles racing against each other. This is really, this is triggering me

back to bake off. Yum. He knew he contestants. Welcome to the great Kiwi Kettle off where today

we're going to find New Zealand's greatest home kettle. So many people are saying they're

electricians or appliance salespeople. There's no way you're getting away with

this tripping of the power. Yes, we are. Oh, no. So, but what happens if we trip to power?

Too much low. Too much low. We might have to evict some people from the race. Okay.

Producers, producers. Do you think a multi-box can handle three?

Well, there's some plugs down here. Why don't we plug around the studio if that happens?

Okay, we do a quick rearrange. Now, it is going to take about three minutes,

up to three minutes for these kettles to boil. So, I think we, in three, two, one,

I'll say three, two, one. Let's all switch the kettles on. Three, two, one. Okay. I heard it,

babe. It's tripped it. We've lost power. We've lost power. We've immediately lost power.

We've immediately lost power. Oh, no. It's in the relocation. Oh, no. Relocation. Relocation.

We've had a test, though. I reckon we have three plugged in. How many power points have

we ever ran in the studio? What did you do on bake off when the oven shat themselves?

We added a day to the schedule. Okay, let's add a day to the schedule. We'll be here on Sunday.

Okay, there's two plugs over here. Two plugs over there. I've got to plug in. The people are

invested. They must know. There's two here. Pass me a kettle. Get me a kettle.

So, we're actually going to plug into the mains now. So, if we drop off air and coast and hits and

all the stations in the building will lose power. That's on us. No, but there's backup power.

There is backup power. Just in advance. Sorry, Mike Hosking, if we lose power.

Now, are we all plugged in? We're all plugged in. All right.

Who's got blue? Who's got blue? Okay. Turn the kettles on and three, two, one. Switch.

Are they on? Okay, they're on. They're on. They're on. They're on. They're on. They're on.

Okay. I forgot that nothing was going to happen once they're on. They take a little time.

See, mine makes a little hiss first. What's happening over there? This is yours down here.

Yeah, the blue. Your light's on. He makes a little hiss. What's happening over there?

We're boiling. It's the Ancoe, baby! The Ancoe's making some noise.

The Ancoe is making a noise. I don't know if that's a good thing or not.

Keep an eye on them for the switches. I've got my eyes on both switches.

Your kettle's not that fast. Yeah, Mike's probably done.

Fletcher says 28 degrees. He's got a degree.

Yeah, I've got degrees coming down on my kettle. Yeah, but what if my kettle is

diverting power from heating to telling me the temperature? Yeah, exactly. Suck it.

That's what happens around the studio. Can you get the mic down to Shannon?

Let's just see how the Ancoe is going. Shannon, how's the Ancoe?

She's humming. I'm getting warm. Humming to that. Getting warm down here?

Is it what it sounds like at your house every time you put the kettle on?

Loud, though. But it's in the butler's pantry, so I don't hear it.

Vaughn, can we get a what's happening over in that corner, Georgia?

You've got a glass top on your kettle here, and we are getting some condensation on the top there.

Jared, can we get a digital readout? 48 degrees. 48 degrees!

Just a reminder, boiling temperature is 100 degrees Celsius.

We are halfway through the race. That's low, right?

They've got some action from Carlin's kettle. Carlin's kettle is joined the race.

It's classic, fantastic. I like coming to the race.

Wait for the click. Wait for the click. How's that Ancoe sounding?

Loud. Still loud.

Could be the camera. Jared, digital update on Flitch's kettle.

58 degrees. 58 degrees.

Okay. I tell you what, Streeties is powering.

Boys, can you put my hand over?

Now, Georgia, your are overlooking Streeties' kettle, the hand-me-down, and the fast,

alleged blue Breville from Haley. Yell out as soon as any of those turn off.

You've got to keep your eyes on those lights. Streeties is hotter.

Streeties is hotter. It could be hot on the outside, but maybe the water inside.

It could be losing heat through the conductivity.

What? The Ancoe is sounding close.

Someone texting saying that Ancoe's at a loud.

Breville's not even putting out any, has he put yet?

Jared, a temperature readout.

78. 78.

Oh, it's just turned on.

It's just turned on.

Oh, it's 78.

How many? I told you.

What? I told you.

You disqualified. He's out. He's disqualified.

He's out.

Disqualified.

I told you the check is sitting.

It came off.

Flitch is out. He's disqualified.

Come on, Streeties is coming.

Streeties is, but it's getting on.

It's getting on movement.

You know, on the side there, you've got the little gauge.

My kettle's just shed itself. It won't turn on.

What have you done to my kettle?

That's you.

Wait, wait, wait. You're done.

Any moment now that we have a winner.

You're out of the race.

What does it sound like over there?

It's quiet.

It's about to finish it.

It's about to finish it.

It's about to click off.

It's about to click off.

What's Breville?

Streeties is close.

Breville's not doing anything.

What?

Breville's getting a little bit of steam coming out the spout.

Breville's about to click off.

The fire.

Breville's getting some bowling.

Breville's about to click.

Breville's about to click.

Breville's about to go bowling.

Is about to pop at any moment.

Haley's kettle or Tony Street's hand me down kettle.

One of these kettle's absolutely different behind.

Commons is still lukewarm.

Breville, Breville's clicked.

Breville's clicked.

I told you.

I told you I got a fast jug.

I told you.

Wait, Jared, is mine even turning back on?

Fletch, we're trying another plug.

Wait, who's in second place?

Wait a minute.

Is the light still on on the back of the ankle?

Yep, it is.

Streeties is going.

Streeties is going.

Tony Street is in second place.

Fletch is up there.

Fletch is dead.

Commons is out.

Fletch over Fletch's kettle, ladies and gentlemen.

We'll just cut away from the camera angle on that.

Okay, Shannon, what's happening in your corner

with the cambrook and the Ancoe?

They're silent, but they haven't clicked.

They're silent, but they haven't clicked.

Okay.

So they're still both my lights on on the back?

Yeah, they're clicked down.

No way, did you killed my kettle as well?

No, it's on.

I can see the light.

Oh, it doesn't have a light on the back.

Yeah, it's on.

It's on, sweetie.

It's just, it's a K mark kettle.

It takes a little bit longer.

Yeah.

Not that I can speak of it,

because apparently my KitchenAid has shed itself.

Oh, okay.

You've killed the outlet over here.

Your kettle and Carwon's kettle have died.

Wait, it's not my kettle.

It's the outlet's fault.

Bang, sorry.

They just had to do that.

It was the kind of thing.

Off to the factory.

Are you sure?

I could probably just still plug mine

into another outlet and beat you.

I've got to tell you, guys,

the cambrook and the Ancoe have still not clicked off.

No, I reckon.

Well, we don't have all day, horn.

I think you've just got to accept it.

I think we've killed that.

No, your light's on, horn.

Is that a sweaty horn?

It's probably finished.

How hot's the water?

At the end of the day, guys.

It's hot, yeah.

At the end of the day, the Breville one.

She didn't, she made it home.

You do have a fast ten!

I know.

What?

Okay, I'm going to tell you.

Can we have a rematch with a new plug for mine?

Absolutely not.

I'm unfair and square.

It's so hot in here.

I feel like I would have beat you.

We've steamed this.

We've steamed this room.

Good for the pause.

Well, that was, yeah.

That wall socket's gone too.

Okay, so we've broken that wall socket as well.

Haley's cheated.

What she claimed was the light,

she could see was a reflection of the...

No, but yours was still bubbling when mine went off, mate.

Okay, look, mine was bubbling before yours was bubbling.

I'm going to call for a rematch here,

because we don't have the same socket.

You've got a socket.

Can you listen?

Excuse me, New Zealand.

Can you hear these sore losers?

Can you hear these sore losers?

Shannon in second place.

Can you hear these sore losers right now?

Also, I don't know if we can afford to break

any more electrical outlets here at work.

Except defeat.

We may need some of the electricians

that have been listening,

warning us against this to come in and fix this.

Breville's number one.

Somebody said my zip beat you all by about five seconds.

For proof, 15-year-olds up.

Proof.

Thank you for playing along at home.

Play.

Zodiacs, Fletch, Vaughn and Haley.

Well, behind the scenes after the great Kiwi sore losers.

Kettle off.

Vaughn and I have officially protested.

The protest flag is up.

This is what the Americas can't do.

So do I not get my medal?

No.

Butterworth over there in a lingy.

Cut us off.

And we have waived the protest flag.

Next week, we're going to get some electricians

to sort out some proper plugs.

We'll find some proper plugs.

We may have fried at least two, lots of twos.

Four different electrical plugs.

We're on here, which is a miracle.

I'm hoping there's just some buttons in a switchboard

somewhere, someone pops back in.

You'd hope so.

We're going to get an electrician.

We're going to have a rematch.

Because this was not a fair race.

I think it was a race in which you lost.

And as men, it's your right to protest that.

And I think you'll find that the Breville

will take it out in round two.

I'm not afraid.

Right.

I accept your challenge.

Am I allowed to opt in over this week?

No, you cannot go out and buy a new jug.

You're stuck with your Ancoe.

Okay.

I honestly, until we lost that wall socket,

the Ancoe wall, and yours was too.

You've just got a grunter.

It's just loud.

It's just loud.

It's a grunter.

It doesn't chug.

It doesn't mean it's good.

Coming up on the show, we're going to play a game

Hoodack Girl for Friday's live tickets.

Now, this is going to be very much like,

but I can guess your mum's name,

Vaughn, we're going to get a girl on the phone.

And then you've got to guess her name in 60 seconds

if you can guess that girl's name.

Am I allowed questions like...

Yeah, you can have a couple.

You can have a couple.

A couple of questions.

And then 60 seconds.

Yes.

And then...

You should only have 15.

So, we'll give you the chance.

So, listen up for the Activator to play Hoodack Girl,

but right now it's time for...

Fact of the day, day, day, day, day.

Today's Fact of the Day is about Roman dental care,

because we are in the midst of ancient Rome.

Fact of the day, weeks.

And we've been covering different parts of it.

The ancient Romans actually had pretty good dental care.

Oh, yeah.

They put a lot of time and effort into it.

Some of their toothpaste probably wouldn't have got the tick

from nine out of 10 dentists, though.

Did they have...

Walnut shells and stuff.

Mincey stripes.

Yeah, were they using St. Ives apricot scrub?

No, one of the flavors was mouse brain.

Yum.

Ooh.

Yeah, road like a brain.

A patty.

Moolied up and mixed with bicarbonate soda, sodium.

Powdered charcoal and sometimes bark was added.

Chuckles good, though.

Chuckles good for the teeth, isn't it?

Oh, is it too abrasive now?

They're saying it's too abrasive.

Yeah, they're saying it's bad.

It's too abrasive.

Oh, okay.

Yeah.

Other toothpastes included powder of Oxhoof's ashes.

So, they would burn the Oxhoof's and then powder them

and put them in.

Well, that's not vegan.

And burnt...

No, not at all.

And burnt powdered egg shells.

Okay, what did the ancient vegans do?

Chuckles.

Well, how did they brush their teeth?

Just a stick.

The ancient vegan...

Yeah, yeah.

I don't know.

Also, I'll just touch on lightly the fact that they also had a mouthwash.

Did they?

They had a mouthwash.

What was it?

Messalina, wife of Emperor Claudius, washed her teeth

with a paste of powdered deer antler and mouse brain

and chose to gargle undiluted human urine,

preferably the super strong stuff shipped all the way from Portugal

where urine was believed to contain more ammonia.

Oh, yeah.

I'm a lover of the Spanish person.

Yeah.

That put...

It's that pair.

Trust me, that's strong.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Strong.

Best in the world.

Best in the world.

Yeah, yeah.

Barrel aged with a beautiful oaky finish.

So, yeah, the Romans, especially in the Senate,

it was a sign of wealth if you had white teeth.

Yeah, right.

And neglected teeth could get you booted out,

even if like naturally you just didn't have very nice teeth

and I'd say teeth taken very, very seriously.

So, today's our Fact of the Day and the final fact

for the Roman, ancient Rome, Fact of the Day week thing.

Download the podcast of all the Fact of the Days

in one podcast.

Yeah.

They're so handy.

They're so handy.

They're different themes.

Is that ancient Roman toothpaste included things

like Portuguese urine and mouse brains.

Fact of the Day, Day, Day, Day, Day.

T-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

I'll be back.

Flesh One and Haley's Hoot at Girl.

So we're going to play this for the next few Fridays

because Friday's live is fast approaching November 16th.

It's Mark Arena.

It's a Thursday in Auckland.

Jason Derulo, Boys to Men, Flow Rider,

Kelly Rowland, JoJo, Travis McCoy, Baby Bash and more.

You know the lineup by now.

It's a great lineup.

The rest of the tickets are on sale right now at ZM Online.

We have a chance for you to be a VIP.

VIP tickets every Friday.

Playing Who's That Girl?

Just like that I can give you mum's name.

Vaughn, you will have two questions to ask our caller.

Two questions.

Our mystery caller.

Good morning, mystery caller.

Good morning, how are you?

Good, really good.

We've named you on the board one or your name could be One.

One.

No, it's not.

There's one.

Now Vaughn, two questions, go.

And then you'll have 60 seconds to try and guess.

What year were you born?

1997.

1997, OK.

Great year for music.

We were just talking about 1997 on the drive-in.

We were talking about the music of 1997.

We're on sync.

OK.

The year Princess Diana died.

Could it be Diana?

No, it wasn't Diana.

It means 97 is like Vicky, Katie.

What's your favourite drink?

Would you drink if we're going out?

Ooh, probably a rum and coke.

Ooh, OK.

Could be Tina.

Could be Tina.

Yeah, could be.

Rum and coke.

Jess, could be.

Could be a Jess.

OK.

Right, Vaughn, you are going to have 60 seconds

to try and guess our mystery caller's name.

Who that girl?

Vaughn Smith.

Go.

Jess.

Georgia.

Hannah.

Sarah.

Emma.

Samantha.

Olivia.

Sophie.

Rebecca.

Becky.

Courtney.

Ashley.

Kate.

Laura.

Taylor.

Lucy.

Yes, that's my name.

What?

Is your name Lucy?

Yes.

Yay!

Yay!

Fantastic.

Congratulations.

I'm well done, Vaughn.

I just...

I opened up Facebook.

You were getting close.

I opened up Facebook and just started scrolling through people.

I know.

Wow.

Well, it's worked.

Congratulations, Lucy.

Well done.

Well done.

We have for you a double VIP pass

to Friday Jams Live.

Oh, my God.

Oh, thank you.

Got him a few bloody rum and cokes on the board.

Oh, hell yeah.

We'll see you there.

I have a rum and coke with you.

Play it.

ZM's Fletch Vaughn and Hayley.

So, long time listeners of the show

will be familiar with my father-in-law.

A very interesting man that he is.

Is he still doing his karaoke sing-alongs?

Oh, OK.

His versions.

So, remember years ago when he owned the harmonising machine?

Yes.

And then he moved to Thailand.

He's Thai.

Yep.

I have to explain that because sometimes people think he's white

and moved to Thailand and that takes a bit more explanation.

Yeah, right.

But when you are Thai and you move back to Thailand.

Yep.

Much easier to get across the board, you know.

Yep.

My father-in-law is not a creep.

Yes.

So, he moves to Thailand.

And he said he got rid of his harmonising machine.

He's just purchased another one off Ali Express.

Fantastic.

Oh, this is great.

So, he's da-da-da-da-da-da-da.

And I played to him the Doja Cat song,

Paint the Town Red.

Yep.

And he said she has absolutely ruined the song.

Diana Warwick's.

Wow.

OK.

Dion Warwick.

Dion Warwick's song.

Yep.

And so, he's like, I'm going to re-record the original.

I was like, well, I mean, if Doja Cat's ruined the song, why not?

We have got...

Namely, a very high song.

We've got to play this.

He's not afraid to give it a go.

Tell him he gets immediate ear time.

As soon as the songs mix and bind us.

Well, he's recorded a couple of songs that we do play.

Yeah, right.

We'll get those two.

He doesn't know how to get them to me.

He plays the middle man.

And she's like, don't you dare.

Please start.

And she's like, don't do it.

We can just go after the show one day.

Go to the department.

Just pick up straight up.

Yeah, totally.

Just down from mine, isn't it?

Totally.

Actually, I did...

He needs some help around the apartment.

I've told him to give you a call because you're closer than I am.

It's just easier.

Yeah, I don't have a landline.

Oh.

Don't you?

I'm not embarrassing for you.

He's never going to get in touch with me.

No.

So, it was his birthday recently.

So, we weren't here.

So, last night, it turned out, was the night we were going to take him out for dinner,

for his birthday.

Yeah.

And we said...

Shade said, what do you want to do for dinner?

And he said, hot pot.

Yum.

Now, if you're not familiar with hot pot...

I've never hot potted before.

No.

What is the deal?

Is it where you get all the ingredients?

Right.

And then it's a broth.

Hot.

Yes.

Seaming hot broth in the middle.

I don't rank it.

Those ends and hot plates...

I'm paying you to cook it for me.

I don't want to cook this myself.

No, it's not the experience.

No.

You're paying for the broth that's taken days.

No time.

It's a long...

It's a long broth.

So I've never done it before.

And then when we got there and Shade was like, what do you want?

I was like, as a person that's never done it before, I'm happy to be lead on my first

experience.

Yeah.

Okay.

And so she was like, well, I've never done it before.

And I said, we'll get your dad to order.

And he's like, ah!

And everyone put their hands up.

So it was started like that.

And everyone's tensions were like, someone do something.

So anyway, we got this broth and it was cut in half.

And one side...

When I thought broth was soup.

So the bowl is in two segments.

It must be gelatinous.

Yes, it's gelatinous.

It's a gelatinous situation.

Half of it is just a tomato-based broth.

Right.

Because the kids were there and they weren't eating anything with spice.

Right.

Now next to it, the spice comes in three levels.

One chili, two chilies or three chilies.

Yep.

And we read on the reviews that it's quite hot.

So you better dig...

So I was like, well, I don't want to kill myself.

I'll go one out of three.

Yeah.

I am destroyed.

You've been in the toilet a lot.

I much of the show in the toilet.

I picked up Haley this morning and I said to her, I was like, I'm going to be touch and

go making it to work.

He picked you up.

You're the unnamed female.

Yeah.

I can't drive.

No, I'm off to the airport.

Oh, okay.

Right.

Think about it.

And I said, I'm barely going to get to work.

Do you drive this morning torture?

Oh, unnamed.

Oh, you've got a truck off as well.

Unnamed.

Unnamed.

Okay.

Could be you.

Female.

I'm not a female.

It says who.

How do you assume you're a GM?

How do you?

So I am...

The one out of three, I say to the guy, I'm like, is this right?

This is too hot to be one.

And he's like, no, that's one.

And he walked away laughing.

Everyone else abandoned it.

I was like, but we've paid for the side.

You've always got to ask if it's a white person, one out of three.

No, there was one.

Parky R1.

It's called Parky R1.

Yeah.

I went one.

Oh, that's why I went one out of three.

And so it was so hot.

It was full of those seshuang peppers that like numb you as they burn you.

And I was eating it.

And I was sweating.

And I was crying.

My nose was running.

It was all house slamming bears.

Because they're the only thing that can stop it.

Shade's driving.

Shade's driving home.

I said you were after my third beer.

I was like...

Unnamed Radio Heist.

Unnamed Radio Heist.

Yeah.

Yeah, it was just...

Slabbing bears.

They pulled me over.

Sweating like I'm guilty of something.

And so I ate it.

And then this morning I was just like, I woke up and I was like, that's not right.

Now, usually I can eat.

I love spicy food.

Yeah, you do.

This was...

I walked in and I put my bag down and I said, and if you'll excuse me, I'm off to the bathroom.

And I've been back a couple of times since.

Every time there's been action, it's not just sitting there waiting for something to happen.

He's got a hot body.

Literally, it feels like I've got tiger balm on my anus.

You've got hot pot, hot pot.

Hot pot, pot rot.

I did a squat and snot.

Were they impressed that you finished?

So I just kept eating the soup and they kept trying to come and fill it up with more broth.

I'm like, no, no, no, no, no, no.

This has got to go.

I'm trying to get through this.

Yeah.

Then Shade's had orders gelatinous duck blood.

Ew.

So I'm like that.

And then he has a few pieces.

He's like, I'm full.

I'm like, I'm out there and that go to waste.

I'm paying so I don't want to think of it go to waste.

And then on the way out, the lady said to me, is this your first time?

And I'm just like swithing and my nose is running.

You've soiled yourself.

I've had like six beers.

I'm like, yep.

And she's like, you did very, very, very well.

Oh, that's good.

And I was like, what?

She's like, no one starts on the spicy side with their first.

I'm like, what?

It should be written down or told, especially to the white people coming.

I mean, side note, you do look thin today.

I have dropped.

I'm guessing three KGs this time.

See you.

See you later.

Actually, I'm going to have to stop you there.

That's copyrighted.

Two KGs is a very good friend of mine.

Well, she's already sued me twice.

So if you could maybe get her to drop her litigious action.

That would be great.

Tell her I'll review her five stars.

Yeah.

If she does the same for this partner.

Yeah.

And then she tells all her friends.

And if you're listening, maybe give it five stars as well.

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.