ZM's Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley: Fletch, Vaughan & Hayley's Big Pod - 27th September 2023

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the ZM podcast network the flesh phone and haley big pod treat yourself to mccafe coffee with my

maccas rewards this is outrageous i'm sorry for the sloppy start of the end of the news and

fletcher's videoing me i didn't even know where they are to center matthew i did have Paul mcclain

oh my god feel i did you are a mess we're all amiss today actually okay i have an answer

yeah we know we've been messaging our friend maddie mcclain about uh last night's episode of

see you just play this audio celebrity treasurer i should just play this audio i don't want to

say what you think it's no no no no i'm not gonna say i trust you but i can't i can't skip this

ad just you know god damn it i'm sorry new zealand oh okay so this is what i didn't

want to watch but last night at the end of celebrity treasurer island jordan who does

lotto sometimes yep i mean i'm a hundred percent sonia gray when it comes to the lotto i know you

are a big sonia gray thing second guessing there the injustice of her elimination from dancing

with the stars hurt you in a way i've never seen it rolled me it rolled me so last night jordan

betrayed national treasure maryland she's a national treasure national treasure she's still a

subway operator i think so yeah she's got a subway jim mora she has her favorite broadcasting couple

yeah um they've stood the second favorite broadcasting to us hey nick and roge um

never dated they never dated yeah apparently not what i heard yeah i think every um male duo

has had gay rumors and they lead the charge um so they played you guys they jordan van

had made betrays mary lamby and national treasure national treasure won't save it from elimination

and this is her reaction right at the end of the show

she's rolling on the ground laughing wow she's lost

now if you clearly yes you and then another f and then the the malving led me to believe

national treasure said a very naughty word if you you effing something something wow well maddie

mclean said he's seen the unedited club it's if you you effing effer oh yeah yeah all right yeah

so three of the same f word yes if you you effing if okay that's funny she's laughing she that's

close what a way to go out she's gone out with a bang she looks maniacal yeah she does it's good

stuff but anyway that's what does something the people doesn't it it does turns you into something

you don't even recognize yeah i wish they'd asked me to do it

oh you don't want to do that i was kidding i've asked a thousand times it's a hard no

you get to you get there's no alcohol for like two weeks i'm out there's not enough food i'd put

a clause in my contract tell you prosecco is on the beach yeah and personal trainers six months in

advance yeah i'll be there skinny and a bikini uh cash catch up this morning again at eight o'clock

if you want to win some cash you can't eliminate me i'm looking the best i've ever looked yeah the

people must see let the people see uh on the way to top six yeah there is a time capsule this is

a classic people still doing time capsules yeah although this one's they reckon could be one of

the oldest ever yeah 1700s it may have been the original time wow wow wow well i've got the top

six things to go to 2023 time capsule COVID test this is 2023 COVID test that would be 2020 that's

trigger one yeah 22 23 but no people aren't even doing it anymore i did one the other day

yeah i've done i've done one recently it's tell you what when you're not hovering it daily yeah the

nosy stuff so yeah clothes really tight and i can't hasn't it started enough for you yeah mine's

sealed back over yeah next on the show i'm gonna talk about breath tests oh it's not a good week for

the new zealom police it's really not a good week for the new zealom and your big ups to the new

zealom police we talk about the well there was at a wellington cop shot himself in the foot yeah

accidentally look not not the best week we'll dive into that next

zm's flets one and hailey it's actually some hot content we should do the country's nicest tap

water it's petone it's petone in the heart they've got that spring you know the fresh spring and you

go on the on jackson street you can go and fill up all your things from the spring dude i love

filling up because at the top of the kai mai rangers there's a spring there and i'll drink

straight out of that just wall that taylor's first song was enix said tartanaki or new plumeth

has terrible water big thick milky water tap horrendous heavy it's almost as bad as titan

not quite that's a milky water well it's interest pretty heavy but you know a lot of the Auckland

water can be from the white catto right oh yeah no i wouldn't even touch that oh no that's the water

i drink yeah oh well at the tap oh it's not milky like your hometown anyway uh the new zealand

police uh have issued a statement apologizing for a mistake made it's when someone pulled up his

name is tj he owned the vehicle uh he was in a 1964 chevrolet impala 64 seven pallet snoop dog is

that oh really things things about 64 impala what does he say um he's come on white guy he's

drinking his gin and juice and driving on the street smoking indo and sipping on gin and juice

laid back with my mind and my money and my money on my mind and shizzle for 64 impala well uh they

got pulled over at a checkpoint yeah and apparently this happened three times over the course of a

weekend because they were heading to a like a car you know what is it called like a speedway

right where i guess they're going people are drinking and people are driving yeah so we're

going to catch him uh but they pulled up and then the window comes down and the police officer

breathalyzes the passenger because it's a left hand drive oh yeah they walk up you would think

outside of this would not be the only left hand drive going to the speedway event i'd say the 99

percent of left hand drive cars are owned by people who go to who go to speedways yeah so the female

officer that winds down asks the passenger say how are you you good you guys having a good night

yeah no problem can't drive driving without a wheel again yeah yeah classic yeah you guys are

rogue yeah yeah Jesus where's your bloody wheel breathe into this count to five one two three

four five and then it passes and she says sweet ass see you off you go and they drive off and they're

filming the whole thing and laugh and get that laugh now apparently this happened three times

over the weekend the first time another cop uh told the officer it was a left hand drive yeah the

second time um the the person doing the breath test noticed it themselves this is the third time

where they didn't notice it all so they just thought it was really funny now the driver did say he was

the designated sober driver they mean the passenger passed as well yeah yeah but the the driver said i

was the designated sober driver i would have passed with flying colors we just thought it was funny

and the police were like hey mate you know what like this was a mistake you could have mentioned

yep driver's over here mate and they did it but um i guess if you're standing up funny if you're

standing up and the car comes along you probably wouldn't notice would you or so you're just going

here just ushering them through ushering them through you're not you're not looking at the wheel

you're looking at the person see if they've got blurry eyes yeah and then breathalyze them and

send them on their way my in-laws have left hand drive cars and we've driven them places

like we got pulled over once i don't know it was just it was just like a random stop that was

variable and yeah they walk up to the passengers and they're like hello oh what are you doing over

there come around yeah yeah oh well good for them 12 past six next on the show uh why working

from home is not turning out good for a lot of people this is there's a lot of these stories

lately i feel like the big management and trying to get everybody back to work well a lot of studies

at the moment about working from home as you say big office want want us back in the office yeah

they really feel like they do they're bored well they probably guess they're paying for all this

office space yeah you want everyone back i i mean i like we've got a we i mean we work in a studio

so we have to work in a studio at the office yeah i think even even if i worked in an office i think

i'd want to work in the office yeah same i just want to get out of get out of the house yeah same

i don't wear pleasure meets play i don't want to add work in there yeah hundred percent but um

they've studied 2 000 workers 60 percent of them admit that they're unhealthy working at home

they've done they've done like a bit of looking into like the food that they're eating

working from home people that work from home consume nearly 800 extra calories

with hybrid working and they take three and a half thousand fewer steps

because you think you're working in the kitchen yes you're not you're not driving and then walking

from your car to your desk or you're not walking around walking to your toilet yeah exactly your

toilet your kitchen at home or like steps away and so it's making like people fatter in the study

i feel like it could go either way because like i know my best friend who works from home a bit

when she works from home she cooks herself a really good like nutritious lunch whereas when

she's in the office she's more like yeah saucy rolls yeah so i guess it's like yeah i i because

when i didn't have a real job and i just flapped about the house yeah i would always cook a pretty

good meal and so now i feel yeah i feel like i'd be healthier if i worked from home but i get it

man if you've got a pantry full of snacks what's stopping you oh yeah and you can eat a big bag of

chips no judgment whereas at work if you just rocked out like a big bag of chips and ate the

whole thing yeah people would be like oh my god are you okay or even yeah a bag of lollies at work

people would be like trying to eye them up or looking at you thinking you're eating a whole

bag of lollies yeah you disgusting dude you demolished that bag oh that that packet of

jeffa thuns oh yeah i'm still eating jeffa jeffa thuns oh my god they're all gone they're all gone

yeah all of those biscuits are not top tier biscuits jeffa thuns no squiggles are top tier

biscuits oh no that's 100 percent a top tier biscuit that's a top tier biscuit i'm not desperate you

know you're eating a biscuit but like a jeffa thing you eat a half a pack and you're like how

did that happen yeah that's the equivalent of two two tim tam yeah play zm's flesh for the nail

hats off to all the truckers this morning you're out there on the road especially the bloody long

hall we've been driving on all night however there are a few amongst you who are uh garnering should

we say attention garnering attention um jeffa garnering i was going to say dunkin garnering

dunkin good garnering dunkin good garnering but some of you are doing tiktok lives while driving

your trucks now i'm not saying you're holding the phones in a holder yeah uh much like if you

were using it for traffic and like dodging traffic using ways or google maps or whatever

but it's live streaming and i remember i used to see this when i'd peruse tiktok lives just to see

what new zealanders who considered what they were doing so important other people should see it

were up to and there were so many truck drivers and it was just like the video was just off the road

yep do they do night time ones as well no this was at night okay yeah right because i

didn't watch it during the day yeah human happens during the day but it's happening like during the

night and yeah not are they showing just the road but but it's night time yeah they're just talking

to people who are commenting which is the dangerous part because they're you know you're gonna read

the question oh yeah it comes up small on the bottom and people are asking questions yeah right

that's no good yeah crack down on that the best part was when you'd see a truck coming the other way

and you'd be like well you've got to do the thing and then they flash their lights and then they'd

flash and toot they flash their lights yeah the flash lights are like if they really care about

their trucks they've put some christmas lights oh yeah yeah yeah some of them really light up

jason lights all over their truck i can get why they do it though because it would be so boring

and lonely do it do it long haul you know my uncle was a long haul truck driver across australia and

he loved it because it's just time alone he is he is asbergic so he um loves his own company

is that the adjective for with asbergic asbergic i don't know i like it i might never fix that on

that for a couple of days and come up with a better title yeah but i'd be you know like i can see why

they would do it it's a bit of a tent a bit of company on the road it would make time flying

yeah totally it's dangerous what if the question is looking down at the little screen and not

having your eyes on the road i mean the little screen is also showing what's on the road but

it's little and you should probably just be yeah concentrating on the road it does feel like an

osh issue yeah plus if you crash it's all on so what it's hit the news and now people are concerned

yeah yeah it's hit the news um because people have noticed that and somebody's asked like what's the

deal and apparently in australia earlier this year it was also a big thing for right asbergic uncle

who's driving across the outback yeah people were like i understand why but like this is also

dangerous yeah it's a distracting thing and you are effectively driving a huge battering ram yeah

well do you rather they were doing this or watching netflix i'd rather they were listening on

radio they should be listening to podcasts or 6.5 which is the full season available now

or getting on the old cb rudge rudge of that rubber ducky yeah he rubber ducky what you're

doing to know where my dad would drive trucks and would go with him that was my favorite part

yeah right he said i wasn't to abuse the privilege no you went a lot slower has everybody got any

eyes on the the maramarua it was truck driving on the 9s they didn't roll their arse of maramarua

got anything about maybe the bloody red fox tavern maramarua be like yeah rudge of that

there's some little kid answering back yeah rudge of that just came through

traffic's looking good it was so much fun he let you go on the cb yeah yeah but not not to

muck around yeah bloody muck around boy you'll get a smack get a smack now people are tick tock

live and god i can only imagine what he ended to think of that in the trunk not god ask him that

sounded like he was dead he's not dead he could ask him but then i have to explain what ticked

on live but yeah can you text him now because now i feel you've cursed him you've cursed him oh what

do you mean i've killed him yeah you've killed your father come on text him send him a text

from the panoramic zm think tank this is the top six

hello there the time capsule has been found it is believed to be the world's oldest time capsule

dated 1726 found in a polish church spire okay they're doing some rena's and some stabilization

and such how do they know it's a time capsule like it could have just been someone's lunch box

it's got 1726 written on the front and oh yeah like a lot that's pretty cool it's pretty rad

it's a rad it looks like a little like a little yeah like a little what would you call that little

case yeah what happened in the year 1726 um i've got to go to the wikipedia page of 171726

um started on a tuesday newton william told the supreme

p isaac stackley about his theory of gravity

huh it was isaac his theory uh big births that year um lord sterling american brigadier general

during the revolutionary war of course december oh yeah celebrate that that's a big year yeah

wasn't it it's a huge year a great day i can't see any other notes what was in there what was in

this um coins 300 year old coins uh a note what did it say um basically like back in five minutes

yeah you know like so many shops at the moment there's not enough stuff so they're like i'll be back

in ten back in five it's like unattended why don't you just tell us you're doing ways yeah like you're

doing ways ways yeah ways ten be back soon that's a pose that's a two that's yeah that's number two

uh a lead bullet um that had been shot into a into the casket and damaged some of the documents so

they think it might be like a rogue bullet from like a world war oh because they said yeah it's

entered post ceiling oh cool so oh okay so it's had four packages it's got four packages in it yeah

1726 1786 1884 and 1914 so they kept adding to it that's not how it works you dumb dumb that's not

how it was but everybody forgot that it was there after that you know over a hundred years ago put

some more stuff in in 1726 three men were arrested during a february raid on mother claps molly house

which is a coffee house catering to homosexuals in 1726 i thought the gays were only invented in

the fifties like it was a hell of a tonight post war post yeah nuclear bombs yeah didn't get the

gays oppenheimer did they did oppenheimer invent the gays went into the gays and that's what he said

when he said he's like i have unleashed something on the world yeah i can the genius out of the bottle

is i can't i can't ever take this back and in 40 years a woman called kristen aguilera is gonna

write a song about a genie coming out of a bottle and the gays are gonna love that and they are gonna

get dirty filthy nasty yeah but tell you what they party yeah and i'll leave you with that

and they bloody my name is oppenheimer you're welcome you're welcome uh so i've got the top

six things to put into a 2023 time capsule guys four warning it's pretty grim out there

number six on the list of the top six things to go into uh a 2023 time capsule maybe uh a sample

of the flood waters from all the floods that have been happening around the world this year yeah

that's only a one in a hundred event yeah 100 year it's a one in a hundred year event that's happened

on every continent and most countries have reported record amounts of flooding here at home

maybe when pakistan was one-third underwater yeah floods in the us hurricanes that bring it in and

surface flooding all sorts of okay from around the world and also but maybe get a bit of that

melted ice cap in there as well it's just some water yeah did you see is it france joseph uh has

500 meters 500 meters in five years what like how much is it when you go and visit the glaciers

they have photos of over the years yeah last time i was here like a year or two ago and that's gone

down so much some old family slides that i've gotten i was looking through them and there was the

glaciers in like the 60s and when we were probably down there and then just all the way down the

black car park it's crazy yeah and he lit a tire there's another slide of him lighting a tire fire

besides that shut up freezing yin and yang man these things are so so cold light a tire on fire

number five on the list speaking of fires are the top six things to go into a 2023 uh time capsule

ash from some of the many many wildfires canada was on fire hawaii was on fire europe was on fire

australia started it is straight up like guys this is going to be a very bad fire season everybody

behave so maybe a bit of ash from some of those wildfires can pop in there too number four on

the list of the top six things going to a 2023 time capsule a russian tank yeah the ucranians in

fact the tank could be the time capsule yeah those ucranians have got very good at disarming

those tanks they have yeah very clever number three on the list of the top six things to go

into a 2023 time capsule uh the crown jewels because queen elizabeth's not using them anymore

they can't get a new crown we could probably pop a few jewels in the yeah that happened this year

uh number two on the list of the top six things to go into a 2023 time capsule ai i'm finished with

it so just pop it all i think we could pop that in the box yeah uh and number one on the list of

the top six things to make it a positive yeah it would be good to wrap this up on a positive

i'm looking forward to this one something good yeah from the year so far the top six things to

go into the uh 2023 time capsule um number one lisa marie prizley tina turner and shanada kona

oh wow okay yeah you said positive that really amplified that i did now yeah that sucks what a

year it's been you should look yeah so i'm looking at the list of well-known people that have died

this year it's a long list like i forgot half of these people would pass yeah crazy that but that's

me at the end of every year yeah it is oh my god i forgot they died that is today's top six

okay there is a lot

shut up it's a fade out it's a lovely fade out shut up tom uh there is a law firm uh urwin mitchell

like it you know like when you know like i like it when it's just names yeah it's because all the

partners say yeah they get together don't they brian christen todd no they always use your

last words how would be how would be what smith fletcher and sprow sprow doesn't go right yeah

fletcher and smith sounds good fletcher smith and sprow that works oh yes fletcher smith and

sprow yeah we do sound a bit more like surveyors like quantities yeah lawyers who's polling well

in the fletcher smith and sprow yeah yeah yeah uh well this law firm has predicted that if someone

was to get married in 2023 yeah and it was to end in divorce then 2031 would be their divorce day

so they're lasting eight years the seven-year rich okay that's the average wait does the itch start

again oh i've been through the itch when did you wear how many years seven years yeah yeah seven

year itch yeah man talks about the seven year itch and then so when's your next seven-year itch

when's your 14 year itch circular i don't know if it just keeps happening every seven years no it

does 2025 is my next seven-year itch it's like fleas they can come back they do we got to keep on

top of your treatment don't you box you get them once a little are you putting the dab on the back

of your neck no don't touch it once you put it on there i want to clean it though yeah that's why

you love to see it reach that off the back of your neck um that's why seven-year itch seven-year

itch is it is it cyclical the seven-year itch i worked hard sometimes part of this having

psychological backing the happiness in a marriage or long term romantic relationships

the declines after around seven years well hang on you guys have been together for you're almost

up for a bloody third seven-year itch yeah we are did your relationship go through a couple of itches

there was a time when Vaughn announced on other shows didn't you you'd go and join other shows

and just talk on them we talked about this and i want to argue in front of i don't want to argue

in front of him he would talk to other radio shows and i'd be like how do you i'm right here

in front of you literally right here yeah but like i said it meant nothing and i was back here

but that's when he told me he was bi radio yeah i was bi radio bi radio sorry he prefers

mornings but he will afternoon yeah sometimes you just want a little afternoon yeah yeah every

now and then but we need to hold but since i've known and it's been a lot easier to deal with

yeah totally because you're like let him go and i yeah you can have every night every friday you're

allowed to have an afternoon slot and then back and breakfast on monday yeah we don't need to talk

about what you did in the afternoon yeah uh this law firm also uh they analyzed a lot of the

divorce because they're a divorce lawyers they would yeah they'd be dealing in divorces all the

time and they'd see how often they end yeah so they have all the data on their people right yeah

and they said that the ideal age to get married as a woman who literally turns 34 next week yeah

is between 28 and 32 of mr of mr you've missed it now i got engaged that's just that's uh

genderless all right 28 to 32 i mean you've been engaged with the lowest chance of divorce

occurring in those age groups if you were to get married at the age yeah but you've been engaged

so long with erin so long it's you're technically married anyway i got engaged on my 29th birthday

yep no i'm a 30th my 30th birthday okay well that's in the bracket you've even got married

that's what they're saying okay yeah so you're still saying yeah i'm doomed but why bother

yeah save the money most common length of um opposite marriages i wonder if they've got

the stats for same sex no they don't homophobic they said that the same sex marriages the most

common length is eight years which is an increase from pre 2021 we can't stand each other anymore

the gays actually get the itch a lot earlier than seven years yes seven weeks seven week

yes seven weeks once they push past that the mating failure so apparently it is cyclical

anything they've identified it it's a they haven't dug down super deep because there's more to it

yeah but apparently it's not just in relationships it's jobs uh living in houses people get seven

year we're about to get our next seven-year itch year after next year after oh yeah total yeah 21

21 years get the third itch i might pop it i might leave i might dance out

i've got a rule uh i've got a deal with my mother my father never goes online so this

is can be avoided for him yeah my mother-in-law my father-in-law anybody that i'm likely to inherit

money off and i don't want it taken by a scammer i mean people that i love and care for yep i would

hate to see them of course scammed to say if you've ever in doubt don't do anything or click

any links screen cap it send it to me and be like is this a scam and i will not judge you

i will just say look it looks like one yep um let me have a little bit of a look but of a google

because often if you google like trending scams yeah you'll you'll see it and you'll be like hey

don't do that yeah i mean oftentimes it's ridiculous have you been getting lots of phone calls lately

i get them from australia i the i always do i just i never answer the visa credit card system

you have purchased oh and i don't get those a whole lot of itunes cards it says you've never

done this before so we have caught this as a precautionary thing press 2 blah blah and i just

hang up and that's when i'm assuming they get your details somehow i assume that's what yeah but it's

not just um the baby boomers and the upper x's that have to be looked after yep uh it is gen z

gen z are three times more likely to fall for online scams than their boomer grandparents

yes dumb dumb shannon and if we go to shannon i believe women's the last time you fell for a scam

quite recent but i get very close on the rig i've said it before thank god she's she's pretty thank god

yeah it sucks as well because my boyfriend literally made a tv show with nigel ladder

about scams and he scammed people and it was this whole thing and that week he was doing it i got

scammed is he scamming you no well maybe i don't know but i like he tried to not be patronizing

but he was like this is interesting this is your the exact kind of person we're studying at the

moment and i was like oh it's all uncomfortable because you know what you're a really kind person

and god you're just beautiful and and she's the you know the inheritor of miss leagues australia

yeah well she fell for one as well we fell for the same was miss leagues australia your mum did

well we fell for the same toll road oh yeah even though you've never been on a toll road

no over a ten minute commute i love that you always know because it's always from an o2 one

number or something i don't think my bank has photo phones so why are gen z falling for scams

more than boomers yeah it is a lot more so five percent of total boomers reported falling for a

scam 16 percent of total gen z reported falling for a scam but then also boomers don't want to

admit they've ever made a mistake so they may not admit it yeah it could be a little bit higher

and that's also what what stops people reporting scams is they're embarrassed about it and they

don't want to be like they have to admit like i've been scammed out of a whole lot of money

and those people that go on the front page of the paper or you know they're online and they're like

i i got scammed a hundred thousand dollars it's like i would never admit that yeah you'd

feel like a fool everybody's just laughing at you you watch those documentaries of people who

lost money and sent money overseas and stuff yeah they get sort of brainwashed and you can see how

even after they've been told that they're scammed they'll quite often still be so caught up in it

that they won't believe no no no their family that are like oh no you're being scammed they'll

keep sending money to um uleo glacis uleo glacis who sounds like he's spanish but he's actually from

niggurag yeah he's just there on holiday though but he's stuck there and he needs money to get

home to his son on rican glacis uh so apparently it's just because gen z spent so much more time

online and lived through social media accounts that they're more likely to um fall for scams

to save their social media accounts your cash your cash cows though are going to be your boomers

because the gen z they don't have much money yeah but then if you're getting a thou if you're getting

two or three dollars from a toll road you know three thousand times of gen z it's a lot of money

what i shared last week or the week before that i got scammed by an online jumpsuit company

right i'd spent close to a hundred bucks on two cheap in cheerful jumpsuits well i got a

shipping update the other day oh so you didn't get scammed well i don't know there's no i think

this the shipping updates another scam shipment status updated well it's got a tracking number

i've i'm because i didn't cancel i'm following with great interest and nothing else has been taken

from my account that i've seen right i should check you really should you really that makes

it sound like there's endless money in there there's not i just if you're a gen z listing now and

you're a bit worried about a scam reach out to Vaughan he's here to help yep yep you don't mind

nah absolutely not just change your profile picture if you're in like a bikini on a beach

before you message me just change that that's hard to explain to my wife wait an attractive woman

in her 20s is sending me screams i saw this article yesterday and i said we simply must address it

i this has hit me in so many emotional parts of my body so there is a cat rescue a charity called

coast to coast cat rescue now i've just followed them on facebook and i've given them a like okay

now is this where they make the cats do the running the biking and the kayaking across the

south island you're gonna try to beat the cats and they run fast yeah the cats in the kayak is

the funniest thing the key the key to it is that they live on one of the coasts and they just take

them to the other coast then because then they've got that instinct tracking thing yeah yes yes yes

yes no they're a charity dedicated to rescuing and rehoming felines now you know how i feel about

that i've got to rescue cat same no i rescued my cat i've told you so why do i have to keep

saying this i rescued my cat from a breeder yeah thank you and how much did you pay well it was

ransom money whatever makes you feel better um now coast to coast cat rescue is launching

a new program called companion cats where they are pairing up the elderly and you know how i

feel about the elderly yeah with these older cats adult cats and they're pairing them up

in a win-win situation for both the person and the cat and that and it gives them something to

love it gives them company and apparently it's just it's changing lives so they're doing they've

got local business sponsorships you know they're a charity they take donations and it covers all

the costs associated with uh the companion cat so the seniors don't have any financial burden

right chip in it and such animals cost a fortune at the moment well you you've got like a hundred

you're not eating some of them it's the cost no no those animals i'm talking the dogs dogs and

cats so food kitty litter flea worm treatments all your sort of ongoing costs for the cat and

medical care so if it got you know stuck in the lawn mower or something no that's a put down well

you're putting your putting your cat down one leg and then you know three leg of cat cute so that's

all covered and the cat can be returned at any time oh that's nice so they don't have a spiritual

bond yeah hard for the cat though cats are very sort of you know is it like

territorial that i constantly get on podcasts for better help if i'm not enjoying the therapist i

can change to another therapist at any time yeah at any time i know this one sucks yeah i have

another cat yeah a less scratchy one ruin my this is like heartfelt and touching like what's

that old person show you like that oh my god uh rest homes old folks home for kindergarten

yeah four-year-olds for four-year-olds oh my god i know because it's the thing like loneliness is

such a huge problem and it's terribly sad for old people so these cats are just little companions

they're still in their laps and i can't wait to be a lonely old person but yeah that's just me

that's just me no cats oh my god scientific no indoor pets scientific evidence has shown that a

cat's purr yeah can calm your nervous system and lower your blood pressure really because it gave

me a hell of a fright when at one o'clock this morning the cat bound out of the hot water cupboard

and started meowing and purring and then jumped on the bed and then i couldn't get back to sleep for

a long time i would say that had the exact no but these are old cats you've got kittens the boisterous

old cats old people it's a win-win yeah i mean we're once an asshole always an asshole that's

silly little poll it is so silly silly silly that's silly little poll silly little poll

today's the little poll what would you rather have exposed your notes app or your group chat

everybody's like freaking out about their notes app so i'm looking and it's just

nothing in here could get me in trouble i've got a lemon chicken sauce recipe oh pass that on

i've got a lot of tv shows and podcasts and books that i have added to my

watch or read list list yep there's always one of them but nothing scandalous and i'm absolutely

shocked at these poll results because i honestly goes back i honestly thought i honestly thought

group chats would be the most scandalous thing to have leaked but it's mine because i use my notes

sometimes to communicate silently to people when i don't want them you know like i i write i just saw

some on my notes app this driver keeps going 25 kilometers over the speed oh yeah and then this

one i think was for josh thompson these seats are making my buddy chi that was from the seven days

tour i also write a lot of jokes unformed jokes i write joke and then i write a thought starter

or something like that and if people read those it'd be so embarrassing i just read when it's not

funny at all listen to this but could the contents of this unfunny joke cost you your career because

there's group chats that probably yeah i would smithy loves a ghost doesn't he i was the guy

it's not even the goss it's just some like in out of context comments or jokes personal jokes

well like we're in a lot of group chats where they're the roasting is full noise yeah phenomenal

but you know well uh the poll results are in and 27 percent of people which would you rather

have exposed 27 percent of people said group chat with your besties yeah so that means yeah you know

nearly a third two thirds of people are saying they're i would say 27 closer to a quarter than a

third yeah it is actually now that now that yeah i wanted to round that make it seem a little bit

over rounded quarter and have three quarters would rather have their notes at what are um people

using notes for producers what are you did you what what did you vote for i see group chat yeah

yeah you'd rather have your group chat exposed yeah i think so because the notes app i'm talking

uni days it's very common for girls to write the boys they've hooked up with i did this yeah what

and i just checked my list and it's full named like i put first last name i don't want you know

knowing their last names just for my notes just for my notes what was that last thing yeah

oh so before i go last name please last name sometimes it's just a nickname it would be just

a nickname or a description yeah blonde big guy my friend's list actually has emojis and each emoji

relates to a certain rating oh i haven't hooked up with anybody since notes apps been a thing

no oh hon oh baby including my wife she's absolutely stonewalled me yeah since their first day yeah

born to set to use a 1b5 or post-its didn't you didn't need a 1b5 there was a lot of pages in that

just a single post that would have taken care of the entire the entire list i know a lot of

girlies as well and i've done this before if you've got a hard message to send you'll pre-write it

in case you don't you don't want to send it in the little box so yeah pre-write them yeah and i don't

i don't want those guys selly okay this is difficult for me to write yeah but it's important i do so

now so you understand how i feel but before i do what was your last name before i do i need to add

you to my list just really need the last name please selly the vast majority of people don't

want people seeing what's in their notes the message is in um a leash no no no no no it's group

chats group chats that significantly less people right to be big chunk but but still a huge yeah

quarter just over a quarter nearly a third and i was edging towards a third uh a lesha says uh the

first time i opened the notes that was a few months ago to make lists of foods i was going to try on a

year on a europe trip so snoop away on my s car go on creme brulee to your heart's extension

they've had creme brulee before you can get it anywhere creme brulee here creme brulee you can

get snails in the garden too i don't think they're quite the same you need to give them a wash and

a bit of butter and garlic yeah yeah the amount of times i've been in homemade s car go and i get a

little blitzen a little blitzen that'll really ruin the meal um josh says bro no one's getting the

boys chat on record right you feral i imagine megan said notes app is full of wholesome things

like cute things my daughter says or dumb things my husband says shopping lists etc chat with besties

would surely result in being cut from other friend groups and disowned from by family members yeah

that is so dangerous well it's like you don't want to hear a overhear a conversation about you

no um shea said i would rather leak a nude than leak my chat oh that would okay that's a good

one would you rather have your nude leaked yeah a nude from win or your 2020 absolutely a new

from 2023 ain't no chance no no but what about those luscious breasts i know give the people what

they want i know what if it was top heavy yeah from the rib cage up she's going 23 um

emma said viewed notes app and then realized that i have all my usernames and passwords on

there like the boom millennial line i am you might want to sort that out because if your phone gets

stolen they've just got everything now yeah my notes page has my practice conversations with

people not my real ones way more cringe practice conversations like hunts chats yeah is that a

thing do you do this for sure practice examples um when we find our last builder we wrote out a

you know the email before you send it because you don't want to write it in the email

yeah you do you just write it in your notes she's saying this is more of a conversation practice

not an not a really good at arguing though because she puts it down and then she works out what i'll

say back she's like doing all the pack of path at the time yeah yeah uh allen said i wake up in

the night and write my thoughts and my notes out there's some real weird stuff in there people

don't even know my strange dreams not dirty this isn't break it's very quickly really quickly

very defensive all right very group chat is mostly about cats and fun things i don't tend to gossip

too much maybe a little bit i'd love to hear grumpy lisa's thoughts on this one oh did grumpy

lisa lisa message shannon's just going to check if we're gonna we always like i think we if she

ever does it's become a little bit of a tradition yeah we'll include grumpy lisa's thoughts on it

um mason said notes app it's just shopping list and carving records group chat would end up with

a few of us in jail or at least a quarter oh god oh yeah that's not what you want that's not what

you want uh no grumpy lisa no grumpy lisa okay grumpy lisa feedback i don't think

but you know you can guarantee god damn guarantee it if grumpy lisa response will sell a little

poll in it i'm gonna say it textbook grumpy fashion yeah we'll put it in the results

21 minutes away from eight next on the show a couple of celebs a couple of kiwi celebs

have had their image used they have outrageous

the effervescent hillary barry or hills bears national treasure hills bears oh my god she's

so sweet and her husband's so lovely we love mr barry mr b at maddie mclean's wedding

good lord he was a hit wasn't he he was a very handsome man he's very handsome

very friendly he gets you going gets me he's got my allergies all the fluster yeah so

her image has been used uh recently to um sell keto fat burning gummies right and if i know

hillary barry one thing i know about her is she is a body positive quen yeah that would not

sell use her image to sell keto gummies were they also using dye henwoods dye henwoods had

the same experience and i know i believe tony street yeah the lovely tony street although

vorn you're still she's still beefing with her correct okay yeah it says tony street in two months

they lost 24 kilos without dieting without fasting using these gummies no that doesn't scream tony

no it's not that's and that's three kgs a week without dieting yeah the news read is

simon de lo i believe he also had his image used on some stage bean i've absolutely done tony dirty

here oh my god edited previous photos edited previous photos of her imagine would you would

use that would you stretch your photo absolutely that is it's insane but imagine if they used you

and they but they photoshopped the after yeah oh this is me and then they photoshop you skinny

in the light and that's the results you'd be like oh i can't believe they've done this or oh my god

there's bloody paula bennett selling these keto gummies i mean she was very open about her

weight loss surgery yeah as the you know the start for her weight loss air dye henwoods had it

they're all just their images being used without their consent yeah well we were talking about this

before the show and shannon producer shannon this happened to you yeah i'm not even a celeb

no well you're a nobody i'm a nobody why would somebody use an utter nobody's image on the

bottom of the society's boot yeah it's absolute scraps of humanity okay dust you are the dust

that accumulates under the couch oh my god i might just go home early today you left in a bin

when the bag is covered in hot water and forgotten about

wow

i'd say she's got a pretty good case for you're gonna lie wow there you're gonna laugh too

yeah guys this is a real dust behavior

all right what do you got meat juice your photo was used yeah yeah so someone it's because

you're so hot because she's bloody beautiful yeah you can't say that either oh i'll take that over

meat juice i'll take anything now the pendulum swings um so in 2021 so what two years ago i got

a notification saying um that someone had followed me and they were called shannon dot trim and i was

originally just shannon trim right and then wait to plug your social media no well i lost it

that's right yes i do i do recall they posted all these photos of me with uh adult things around

me saying if you want to see my only fans um and they had this girl who looked quite similar

to me what is your only fans that shannon and jade yeah yeah she's in the middle initial in there

but yeah they found this model who looked quite like just generic features she was blonde but she

had all these adult things with her they followed all of the men who followed me including my bosses

they followed my brother they followed all these men oh my god and then i obviously reported their

account you know all my friends were reporting it and then i got a notification saying your

account has been deleted by instagram and they counter reported me and i got deleted as my own

catfish oh my god and i had had that instagram since i was 13 years old that had existed for

years and they wouldn't have used your account if you were binge juice so you know i just want

to really go on record and say you're not binge you're a fresh fruit salad yeah you know but yeah

they would use these like scandalous photos and then the next photo would be a legit photo of me

and they kind of copied my feed but scattered it with oh my god because they photoshopped your

face on that woman no that she just looked kind of similar to me and i guess amongst the feed of

photos that were me that they took from my account so i lost my instagram and i submitted to instagram

my license i had to submit all my id my passport everything to prove my identity and it still got

denied so i had to make a brand new account which is at Shannon j tram yeah i had to chuck a j in

there so what happened to the account that was you the fake one it existed for a while but now

when you search i don't think anything comes up right yeah gotcha i reckon we should take some

calls and messages of when someone's used your image and you've just been regular and you've

whether you're binge juice or you're a fresh fruit salad or you're mega famous i know a girl who

was like in a relationship and they'd used her photos and made a tinder and she was like wait

that sounds like a likely excuse no one would believe them no one would believe a guy pulling

that shit but you know and she you know was in a happy long-term relationship but someone had just

because she had an open i guess facebook or instagram people used her photos and and were

catfishing people yeah i've had that once before we've talked about that we want to know when

someone used your image probably without your consent yeah maybe you were a stock image for

something yeah you ended up advertising something online yes or you know you see those like cafes

and they've got like those wall stickers of like people sitting outside and you're like huh or you

go overseas and they take a photo of you doing some um i don't know ziplining thing and then all

of a sudden you're the face of a mexican zipline the boarding i got tagged in this thing and someone's

like did you get this done and my they'd used my face and they'd done that photo show would

have looked like if i got that tattoo boarding stuff oh my gosh okay well oh and what about

what about those people that get filmed from behind for those like yeah you need to lose weight

we want to know when someone's used your image hillary barry the lovely hillbars yeah people

are using her image to sell uh keto gummies keto gummy bears same with tony street dying

henwood paula bennett and we want to know just if you've had this happen as a non-celebrity

have you had someone use your image a bit of binge juice your destiny to use your image uh jack

good morning morning how are we doing somebody use your image yeah so i was probably in about my

mid 20s and people said that there was like a tender going around of this guy named chris

who was uh 31 years old but using photos from when i was like 19 oh my god so was that when you

look hottest jack do you think you look at us that no you're looking good now you're quite hot now

yeah i'm quite hot now you sound you sound hot yeah you do sound hot but then they're not going to

use a manga are they if they're doing a fake account no it is it is it is a complement of sorts

sweet where did they get the photos of you as a 19 year old from i i guess they got them off my

facebook yeah you got a lot of that quite a small town a lot of people were like what's this oh wow

wait did you have a partner no i can't thank god because that wasn't like a big deal but also like

maybe they're getting matches i'm not yeah yeah taking your matches i'm wearing that congrats on

yeah well well done take taking the compliment i guess yeah uh as horrible as it is we want to

know when somebody's used your image oh my god listen to these these just these are hot off the

press oh my god my daughter had an ex-friend steal a bikini pics from her social media and set up

on only fans using her photos and was making money off them what oh my god i had someone use me and

my partner's um tape on twitter after my snapchat got hacked last year a bit of a weird thing to

come across you would hate that flit for your snapchat god oh that thing just dings the whole

show oh my oh my oh my um i had a family photo at kelly charlton's in the 1990s okay where's this

going and then our friend was in tokyo on holiday and it was the size of a billboard it was my family

promoting kelly charlton's in japan oh my god they don't chuck binduos on a billboard in tokyo

though no they don't look like a family i want to see the photo if you can see that in that'd be great

katherine good morning when did somebody use your image morning guys how are you very good thank you

very well uh so when i was at university i broke my league and um used electric wheelchair to get

around because i couldn't walk and katherine was it a bit much could you even those scooters

we got a leg up there a bit look at me are they yeah go on katherine please please you're in pain

yet a broken leg thank you um yes i had my photo taken and then i became the poster girl for

disability services and that's not no no no no no no no you were temporarily

that's you you're gonna be able shamed oh oh my god well this is as bad as we're on glee that guy

in the wheelchair it turns out he wasn't even in a wheelchair oh my god and the guy on super store

he's not even in a wheelchair are you kidding me no he's in an arty from glee and bloody katherine

over here katherine all cancelled uh thank you katherine listen to this story it wasn't my image

that was used but after my previous partner died sorry to hear that someone made a facebook with

his name and image and started messaging me saying i miss you what that's bad no that is so manipulative

oh my god that's sad my husband's ex used my facebook profile picture to make a ad and she

put it in the paper saying i was a sex worker with all my oh my god you can take them that's

information right you could totally take them okay here's another one well we just had um katherine

able washing um someone said at uni there was a picture of me one day and i was like from a

distance i was like is that me and i got closer and i was like oh no and it was like i am brown but

i'm not moldy and i was being used to promote moldy oh no i don't i'm that can happen to your wife

i didn't do this i didn't do this

now we've been talking about the um the observations that people are making about

men and women and the things that we do and think about the roman empire uh men have a favorite war

uh men think that they can how embarrassing it was vietnam so embarrassing it was

men think that they can land a plane yep yep women are thinking of being kidnapped and now

people are noticing that the girlies we have small tv's and we don't care

always yes you do you buy small tv we buy small tv it's just a small screen thing you could be

watching a show on television but you'll turn your phone sideways and watch it on the phone sitting

on the couch in front of the tv put on the big screen no i love watching things on my laptop

only if you're bed bound and there's no tv in your bedroom or if you're on a plane

or at the gym should have should a tv should be watched on anything less than 65 inches now i will

say i have a big tv now yes that's not up but when it is it'll it'll be great but before that i had a

very small tv 30 inch that's embarrassing that how did Aaron let that happen i don't know you

emasculated them yeah i know but we're more of an aesthetic house and because we didn't have

an aesthetic tv we were like we'll just keep it small poor fella poor guy hey no i've i've

i'm gonna turn things around next week i've never met a guy that says um god i love living in an

aesthetic house yes he bloody loves it i love the theme yeah i was telling him about plans for

the designs of the house and he was like no i don't want to do it i said just get out of my way

let me do what i want this is me when we've changed things are renovated in the past shut

is that what do you think i said it just doesn't matter what i think though does it yeah well it

doesn't if you're gonna be like that yeah before i was like go like this now can we ask our gurlies

shannon and carwin do you have a small tv yeah and it just doesn't bother me at all yeah you're

just happy to watch anything on a screen yeah yeah how big are we talking well how big is a computer

like like a computer monitor yeah bigger than that for sure but not well like this big like a

half meter as big as this tv on the wall oh no way smaller than that oh my god that's embarrassing

she must be rocking some kind of 30 inch thing and she's like like the back of it's quite oh

wait have you got a body back yeah but you don't need that i'm watching below deck i don't need

hd big body back the depth of the may god they used to really take those hd cameras on board ships

to document the life below deck for you to watch it and fuzzy non hd no but then i feel like i'm

on the boat can't oh my god carwin how how small is your tally well we have quite a big one but

it's because it's not mine oh because it's your boyfriend's yeah okay but before that i had maybe

like a what's the standard like a 25 inch 20 that's so small what am i doing i'm just watching

gossip girl on it you know like glee doesn't need to be high definition jared you live with a woman

you gotta you're rocking a small tally of you and forced a larger tally roll um we're rocking a

smaller tally but because the big tally broke oh yeah right you've downgraded but small tally's

maybe a little bit smaller than a wall tv oh yeah 40 inches 42 yeah okay yeah yeah we're down from a

58 on show that oh babe i miss it how big is yours flinch 75 65 oh wow mine's bigger mine that's

75 i was like i'm gonna next time i get a tv it's gonna be 85 i'm ready for an 85 yeah no you're

not yeah i know you're not i am not in your setup it is it is i don't care if they have to be too

high by the way we need to bring that down i do know you're too high too high there's a ratio it's

got to be at eye line when you're sitting down we did the power ring in our wall for our tv and

i was like we're gonna bring it down vorns is too high no i like it up there because you can see it

from the dining table yeah i know because you're a mat you're a father and you stand to watch tv

i will 100 walk around that's what's happened you're a man father what are you watching here

yeah mr beast hands on hips look where they are what's mr beast up to oh yeah this is how i watch

mr beast what is this buddy guy what's he called the budget on this why don't you kids watch something

with a bit of story he's got his own chocolate bar what's he doing here he's flying and all you

know what he did last week what what are you traveling in all the different prices of flight

things he was like this is the cheapest you can fly and they flew economy and then he's like and

this is what oh yes and this is business class and this is first class and this is emirates cabin

and he just spent hundreds of thousands of dollars taking these shithead mates

around the world go outside in the rain and clean up a bloody mess

who's the real mr beast around here jaren says you know producer jaren knows someone with a 98

inch oh that's too big yeah that's cinema you're almost got a mini cinema it takes up not the whole

wall of his living room because he's quite rich but yeah it's probably it feels like this giant

you've got rich friends yeah one of emir's mates is dating a ceo of

yeah i always i always think when you walk into someone's house and if they got a nice big tv and

it's warm out and i always say i don't know right for themselves it is yeah it's on a cabinet and it's

small

yeah great big crt thing they invite you around to watch something bunny ears on top you guys want

to watch the all blacks and you're like i don't even really care about sports up though man up the

waz 2024 is going to be our season but don't invite people around to watch sports at your house if

we're sitting around at 30 something we're certainly not going to shannon's for any kind of viewing

party ever yeah sorry shannon 30 inch computer monitor we don't have enough seating anyway we're

everybody happy to reallocate shannon back to being bingus yeah i think i think this is big

this is big couch dust energy

tinda in the us has started taking applications for its premium tear subscription

so at the moment or at the moment on tinda you can there's different levels you might pay i think

it's like 30 bucks a month or 20 something a month right um and that gives you more swipes whatever

but this premium service is aimed at the top 1% of tinda users you've got to be invited and it

will cost you 500 us dollars a month that's no that's just over 800 new zealand dollars a month

oh that sounds expensive when they that is expensive when they say top one percent of users

like that's the hot ones right the ones with the algorithm you know you see those how do you get

invited i need to pay for this well your hot people have got a good way to get it they got to the

ready well how it's the mingers that'll end up paying how do you how do you get invited

how do they know you earn lots of money no so i think they just somehow work out from you using

tinda if they want to invite you so that's what's making me think you've got to be hot or

somewhat of a regular user yeah before maybe they open it up to everybody for a month or maybe

they won't you might as well hire a prostitute i wanted to say that but didn't but i that's what

i was the cheaper yeah well yeah you know at least mucking around if that's how much money

we're bloody spending i'm trying to find lovers so what is what is weird is that this will give

you the option to be able to if you see someone's profile you can just message them right without

even matching so would you yeah that would be that's pesty right big pesty energy i didn't swipe you

yeah and then they're messaging you saying hey you're hot how's about it and i've already decided

that you're not but they're paying five hundred dollars a month but they might tell you where do

you get all that money they might have a big tv i might say daddy where's the money from then they've

got a 98 inch tv yeah oh weird but hey good on them for making money what's tinda worth these days

tinda worth i don't know because they own a whole bunch of yeah they own a whole bunch of like i think

they own other ones like okay match group and match group yeah match match group they own a bunch of

them but yeah so um you may be invited uh in the in the future if you're one of tinda's top

one percent and if you can afford five or eight hundred new zealand dollars a month nope for this

service no play durian's flesh born and hailey fact of the day day day day day

today's back to the day uh anthony supplied this thank you anthony for roman ancient rome fact of

the day week themed i still haven't really worked out how to say that yeah rolled off the tongue

well this is because and you would have seen this online guys all they do is think about

anything about rome i remember this will get this will get you thinking this will get you thinking

okay because uh anthony said have you heard of the the nemesh ships of ancient rome and i said i

haven't and now i've been reading about them fascinating yet puzzling okay because on a lake

the neemi lake neemi uh in italy uh there were two large ships constructed pleasure barges

that that uh were destroyed by fire in world war two after um musselini had spent lots of money

to get them up as a sort of a look at our long history of naval pride right uh look at these

beautiful ships that were built centuries ago yeah they were built in one ad so by the time world

war one happened these things were nearly 2000 years old these ships that have been sitting on

the bottom of the of lake neemi now you might be thinking ships on a lake how big is this lake

well i've been googling sizes of lakes that are comparable to have two large luxury

pleasure ships built on them did they do like a dinner cruise they did everything dude i'll tell

you more about that in a minute okay if i may tell you uh you need to localize this if you're

familiar with lake poepleke on the north shore of Auckland nope yeah not that's a real um it's a

small lake it's really deep though isn't it it's very deep it's very small that's how big the lake

was okay if uh for Hamiltonians listening the Hamilton lake oh yeah the one down by the playground

you know that lake and compete to lake popor whoa whoa whoa calm your like a slither you've

gone way too big there would be larger lakes on farms than this lake and maybe like for wellingtonians

because i don't know of any lakes in wellington maybe like 10 bucket fountains oh okay i see no

maybe like 100 well it was like one point the equivalent of like 1.1 square kilometers i've

got a list of lakes here uh you know there's over 3000 lakes in the size uh around new zealand um

very interesting now i've kind of got lost a little bit down the rabbit hole of lakes around the uh

lakes around New Zealand but there's lots of like local comparisons for like how about

how about that poepond why doesn't haggley park have a lake does they have a lake doesn't

they no haggley park i do find a christ church a comparable christ church lake and it's out of

town a little bit right start a petition get christ church lake get a nice lake at haggley park

um so we can go on row boats and get some ducks and stuff we've got the punting down the bloody

get some ducks yeah i know that's a river isn't it we're gonna shoot the ducks on the haggley park lake

no just like we get some ducks for the lake i'm just saying oh yeah no she's already ducks in there

ducks will just come to a lake i think you don't need to get them you don't need to force them

no you've got to invite the habitation you've got to start you've got to invite them facebook

invites yeah yeah yeah come and check out this quacker of a new body of water and they wouldn't

say that they're not self aware that they don't come on but wait we're sending the facebook invites

but they're not going to get a absolute come on come on can you take the seriously please

puns born yeah god he's sometimes i wonder if he's coming live at our lake for free you won't be

billed they're not doing humor they are famously a humorless bird oh okay what is wrong with you

daffy duck of course donald duck famously humorous humor less yeah thank you okay so he two of these

bigger ass boats were built on this lake why well it was the lake apparently had a little bit of

like religious reason so like yeah your flitch is rolling his eyes the at the right on a full moon

it would like fully reflect the lake yeah and a big image of jesus make it look well no this was

pre-g well because it turned into a mirror and reflected jesus from the clouds yeah no really

the time of jesus more like egyptian you don't know religions no it is it says here it says isis

for you the egyptian isis called isis was certainly not around then not they were way around in

toyota um toyota hilux there is a lake in haigley park yeah my sister lord just kicks me saying

ah there is a lake they sail remote control boats on it why haven't i ever seen this lake i'm going

to look at that there's a river and river goes around the outside i know there's a river born

upon the avon that's the river on river where's the lake in haigley i'm going to keep going with

what was on the ship i'm going to have a look so when they are finally got these oh it's big

i can see it without even victoria lake look at that there is a lake you didn't do a very good

google search one i googled christchurch lakes and it gave me nothing it gave me one on the outskirts

of town yeah no this is good yeah look that's a nice one shut up alice alice has just messaged

from christchurch everyone all our christchurch listeners are very upset with us well you know

when next time um we're in christchurch for work we're going to go to the lake and feed the ducks

who no you can't feed them who are humorless birds don't do puns as we've established you can't

love facebook they can't yeah i stop talking about yeah you go from the botanic gardens you go over

and then victoria lake oh there's a public toilet nearby oh good perfect that's what i like with my

you know you've worn ducks humorless low-breed have facebook go cruising old school stores yeah

that's what a duck does anyway these boats these boats sure shouldn't let me tell you about the

boats when they finally got them so fishermen local fishermen new lakes is like albert is right

next to victoria lake so they've actually got two albert and victoria yeah queen that'll be why

they've called them those uh so they uh they the local fishermen knew about these boats for ages

and when they wanted to like sell things to tourists i'm talking hundreds of years ago they

just dropped hooks down and until it grabbed something and then just yank it and hope that

they broke a bit off and then they could sell it so people were doing this for a while so when

they finally drained this lake pre-world war two musselines like drain it let's get this out as i

said before let's show the people what a wonderful naval history we had um they'd kind of been pulled

to bits but there were still things there's a museum dedicated to them you can go and see all the brass

fittings but they said they had marble floors oh mosaic floor heating and plumbing there were

baths on the boat that pumped water in heated it you could bathe yeah i'm guessing eat drink

so very similar to the inter-islander very similar except just on a lake and there was two of them

on different sides of the lake they believe it was some sort of like religious competition on who

because of jesus who could it work again jesus didn't have skin in the game at the stage of the

the proceedings it was the religion du jour was mostly just egyptian and roman gods but they had

different sides of the lakes and the different moons okay and these two massive boats they

bought them up in world war two and they were like look and then uh they got burnt down okay wrap it

up you've been going on too long they got burnt down so i just can't believe had he thought that

ducks had a sense of humor the world's famously done the world's first luxury cruisers were invented

by the romans but were on a small lake no bigger than lake victoria and christich which

i've known about for years the one with this the step up silver the one with the birds were

impaling themselves on i have been to that lake me too oh that less of a lake more of a sizable

puddle fact of the day day day day day

play zm's flesh for the naly play zm

today the impossible phone and topic uh this is a story that we think is hard yeah a topic

that we may not get many calls on hopefully we do on this one it's very interesting oh yeah so the

we got the idea from this news story an ohio man was out hiking and he'd had enough

we've all been there we thought you thought i'm gonna go for a hike no training nothing

we've all been enough more than we can chew and that's when he decided that rather than walk

all the way back out of the trail he would call 9-1-1 and fake a bear attack

yeah so that the helicopter had to come and rescue him now what did they say when they

saw him and he had no scratches on him well that so you should see the other guy when he

when he dusting off his fists when he called he claimed to be near death suffering a head

injury and being circled by bears circled by bears bears famously like sharks circle you

yeah um and so yeah when they obviously when they picked him up there wasn't a scratch on him

and they're like well what's happened i told you about that podcast about that guy that did

actually get attacked by bears yeah he survived it yeah i've listened to that it's insane horrible

so he actually uh was very intoxicated uh and apologized for wasting their time he's pissed on

a tramp yeah he's pissed on a high um he was arrested and charged with falsely reporting an

emergency incident a misdemeanor with a maximum penalty of six months in jail yeah five hundred

fine do you know how much it costs to get a chopper in there yeah they're they're not cheap

they're not cheap and this is even an ambulance they've got medical equipment in those choppers

an ambulance is at least a million dollars yeah ambulances in New Zealand cost like a million

bucks to buy yeah oh yeah that makes sense i think you mean like how much they charge you to like

go out for a question no no it costs a million dollars to have my marching coach left one

in her memory and when we found out how much we were like yeah but that nose isn't free

no it's not it's not all the bandages and stuff um so we want to ask this morning

i'll eight hundred dollars at m nine six nine six have you ever been helicoptered out chop it out

of somewhere lift it out somewhere exciting imagine that that's your first time on a helicopter

for most people yes my nana went in one when unfortunately she passed away but she was in

the fungerate like the north hospital yeah and they didn't have the right things the chopper

at Auckland and she'd never been in the past when she got to Auckland yeah not in the chopper

that'd be pretty cool if you had to die halfway to heaven already halfway to heaven you know taking

a bit of the legwork out of it for jesus that would mean that heavens at what like 28 000 feet

you have you ever been up there it'd be the bar in the plane man that's my goddess outside the dome

right okay so i'll eight hundred miles at m it's the impossible phone and topic has anybody

listening now being helicoptered out oh my god of sighting yeah maybe you really hurt yourself

and you you're on a tram you've never been on a helicopter right i've never been on one not even

for lesia they are the wildest the first time i went on one it was a small like two-seater one

which was scary enough but that when it leaves the ground it is the most unusual feeling it

gives a little bit of a wobble and then there i here we go mary and you're just like no no no

this is wildly unnatural that that long uh flight we took from Auckland to Rotorua that was wild

because there was a long time in a helicopter yeah and it was hooning yeah great the best way to get to

right like Rotorua really really so quick so quick we must go why oh my god this was for

this was a work that we certainly would pay for that um i'll eight hundred don't flinch and i

have earned in this sort of money we will just helicopter at Rotorua have a nice boys weekend

of course well just i'm just asking you to helicopter home to get it to get around traffic

yeah not on a word of a lie uh i'll eight hundred does it m is a number text through

nine six nine six impossible phone and topic have you ever been chop it out of somewhere

well a man on a hike in ohio had enough he was boozed uh he called 911 said he was surrounded

by bears and had a head injury he just wanted to be helicoptered out what is what how wrong

is your day gone when you're alone and drunk in the bush like what's happened where are your friends

why you drunk i know that's a bad day um but it's the impossible final have you ever been

helicoptered out not impossible helicoptered out by the way we're hearing lots of people who've just

farted about in helicopters which are cool stories like jeff said when he was uh in florida he got to

do a police swat and he got to do a drunk bus by helicopter couldn't chat but one of us to know

i wanted to know what you can just go along with the swat team or is he actual no i think he was

i think he was actually i don't mean they're just like hey who wants to have a go at this

i think there's a bit more to them they'll be called a meritan police force who knows who knows

who knows uh all right we're texting calls jamie have you been helicoptered out i have twice

twice whoa okay your bad luck how how what what happened so the first time i was maybe 19 we went

with a group of friends for a walk up mount taranaki yep and i probably i probably wasn't

wearing the best shoes anyway on the way back down i blipped a couple of times and i rolled my

ankle really bad and i couldn't get back down and the ambulance couldn't come get me and get up to me

so my friends had to put me on a wire fence to carry me back down to the base and the helicopter

had to come get me that time oh my god that's embarrassing isn't it wait did you break the

ankle was it just sprang no i literally just sprained it oh so they could walk do they

send you a bill for the helicopter i didn't know that's part of our beautiful health care system

they're great aren't they they do an amazing job and then once you this happened twice so

yeah twice so the second time i was on a family camping trip at uh like wikid and moana and on

yeah it is beautiful there on the way home um we were driving around the rewindy roads and we

got into a car crash and it wasn't anything serious but i got really bad whiplash and we were just

worried about my spine and stuff i couldn't see wait i want to be there when you roll your ankle

and get a whiplash you're like helicopter now whiplash though it's dangerous yeah i do want to

say slightly you know i want to see a broken spine i want to see a fractured femur uh jamie thank you

the impossible phone and topic we want to know if you've been helicoptered out

so many so many people you always see that chopper up there i guess it's going somewhere

yeah and the people who have been helicoptered are messaging in listen to this one i got abandoned

up mount ruo pehu because the shuttle left without me they just send a chopper

did you just being up there like how do i get down hello hello it's an expensive way home that's you

sarah you were uh chop it out yeah hi hi good boy so i think she might be a sarah more than a sarah

sorry sarah sorry we do have a sarah for next though oh my god okay sarah well sarah sarah

i apologize uh when did you get chopped it out um so when i was 11 i was skiing on ruo pehu with

my dad and going going up a rope so so holding on to the rope and when we got to the top dad

hopped off started going down the mountain i went to let go and i couldn't let go and my jacket had

gotten wound in with the rope she's gonna lose an arm and so i literally couldn't let go and

my dad saw what was happening and he was like okay she's gonna get a hell of a fright but there's a

she'll go over the safety brake and it'll be fine but i went over the safety brake and it didn't stop

and went through the machine like into the they had there was a temporary one sarah back in the

day it had massive big wheels sarah's in the machine so um they did you rage against the machine

no she's in the machine i was wasn't raging um anyway a guy that was nearby came and pulled

the brake until it stopped and it stopped and you know i had to get chopped it off

what happened to you they've got a burn this unit um i'm fine totally fine but i did have um like

burns on my arms on my back and my face was all kind of like to get a lifetime to get a lifetime

passed to uh no they gave me a pass for the next season but i didn't know the next season that's not

enough it's lifetime baby that's all i've did you get a nickname toe rope yeah i did it i did it maybe

it's taken a few years to be funny that's traumatic that morning that morning i'd asked my parents for

a helmet which was quite unusual back then then the helmet had they had stopped and hired me one

and the helmet had completely been cut out the helmet saved your life how good are helmets

that's the best helmets protect them reins even talk to sarah sarah thank you so much let's go to

sarah now shut this bit of your good

sarah i think i've had twice oh okay did you get chewed up by a ski rope one of those times

um no first time came off my horse um up mount prong here at the 12 year old okay damaged my spinal

cord oh see that's where the helicopter not a sprained ankle not a sprained ankle and uh what

did she get a sore neck what was the second one sarah

second one is not real payho um i used to do can get a spang and i had a rock actually

got between my helmet line and my goggle line stop it oh my god a rock so you fell over and

hit a rock and it went in between oh it went in between so thankfully for having the helmet and

star hey can we give call of the week to the helmet i mean the helmet the helmet

the helmet would certainly win we've got to give it to a human because the helmet we didn't hear

what happened here the helmet so the helmet donned what happened you did you get knocked out cold

yeah i got knocked out cold um i day banana me took down a banana boat down to ski patrol

ski patrol um and they were trying to wake me up for over an hour before i finally came to

and now you're alive now i'm alive give them a cafe we're gonna give you the call of the

wake fifty dollar mac cafe voucher thanks to our mates at mac cafe not just for you but also for

the helmet the helmets uh thank you for all of our text messages so many so many hundreds of

texts should we do a little potty spish with some of these stories of survival and then a helicopter

yeah well if you enjoyed that give us a rating and review and be sure to tell your mates you know

what i reckon your script reading is getting better thank you i give it five stars yeah just

like i'd give this podcast i'm telling my friends about your um script reading too thank you much

like i'm going to do about this podcast thank you vorn and hayley for that good boy zm's fletch vorn

and hayley

Machine-generated transcript that may contain inaccuracies.